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Understanding of My Personal Motivation

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Published: Sep 19, 2019

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10 Personal Statement Essay Examples That Worked

What’s covered:, what is a personal statement.

  • Essay 1: Summer Program
  • Essay 2: Being Bangladeshi-American
  • Essay 3: Why Medicine
  • Essay 4: Love of Writing
  • Essay 5: Starting a Fire
  • Essay 6: Dedicating a Track
  • Essay 7: Body Image and Eating Disorders
  • Essay 8: Becoming a Coach
  • Essay 9: Eritrea
  • Essay 10: Journaling
  • Is Your Personal Statement Strong Enough?

Your personal statement is any essay that you must write for your main application, such as the Common App Essay , University of California Essays , or Coalition Application Essay . This type of essay focuses on your unique experiences, ideas, or beliefs that may not be discussed throughout the rest of your application. This essay should be an opportunity for the admissions officers to get to know you better and give them a glimpse into who you really are.

In this post, we will share 10 different personal statements that were all written by real students. We will also provide commentary on what each essay did well and where there is room for improvement, so you can make your personal statement as strong as possible!

Please note: Looking at examples of real essays students have submitted to colleges can be very beneficial to get inspiration for your essays. You should never copy or plagiarize from these examples when writing your own essays. Colleges can tell when an essay isn’t genuine and will not view students favorably if they plagiarized. 

Personal Statement Examples

Essay example #1: exchange program.

The twisting roads, ornate mosaics, and fragrant scent of freshly ground spices had been so foreign at first. Now in my fifth week of the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco, I felt more comfortable in the city. With a bag full of pastries from the market, I navigated to a bus stop, paid the fare, and began the trip back to my host family’s house. It was hard to believe that only a few years earlier my mom was worried about letting me travel around my home city on my own, let alone a place that I had only lived in for a few weeks. While I had been on a journey towards self-sufficiency and independence for a few years now, it was Morocco that pushed me to become the confident, self-reflective person that I am today.

As a child, my parents pressured me to achieve perfect grades, master my swim strokes, and discover interesting hobbies like playing the oboe and learning to pick locks. I felt compelled to live my life according to their wishes. Of course, this pressure was not a wholly negative factor in my life –– you might even call it support. However, the constant presence of my parents’ hopes for me overcame my own sense of desire and led me to become quite dependent on them. I pushed myself to get straight A’s, complied with years of oboe lessons, and dutifully attended hours of swim practice after school. Despite all these achievements, I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success. I had always been expected to succeed on the path they had defined. However, this path was interrupted seven years after my parents’ divorce when my dad moved across the country to Oregon.

I missed my dad’s close presence, but I loved my new sense of freedom. My parents’ separation allowed me the space to explore my own strengths and interests as each of them became individually busier. As early as middle school, I was riding the light rail train by myself, reading maps to get myself home, and applying to special academic programs without urging from my parents. Even as I took more initiatives on my own, my parents both continued to see me as somewhat immature. All of that changed three years ago, when I applied and was accepted to the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco. I would be studying Arabic and learning my way around the city of Marrakesh. Although I think my parents were a little surprised when I told them my news, the addition of a fully-funded scholarship convinced them to let me go.

I lived with a host family in Marrakesh and learned that they, too, had high expectations for me. I didn’t know a word of Arabic, and although my host parents and one brother spoke good English, they knew I was there to learn. If I messed up, they patiently corrected me but refused to let me fall into the easy pattern of speaking English just as I did at home. Just as I had when I was younger, I felt pressured and stressed about meeting their expectations. However, one day, as I strolled through the bustling market square after successfully bargaining with one of the street vendors, I realized my mistake. My host family wasn’t being unfair by making me fumble through Arabic. I had applied for this trip, and I had committed to the intensive language study. My host family’s rules about speaking Arabic at home had not been to fulfill their expectations for me, but to help me fulfill my expectations for myself. Similarly, the pressure my parents had put on me as a child had come out of love and their hopes for me, not out of a desire to crush my individuality.

As my bus drove through the still-bustling market square and past the medieval Ben-Youssef madrasa, I realized that becoming independent was a process, not an event. I thought that my parents’ separation when I was ten had been the one experience that would transform me into a self-motivated and autonomous person. It did, but that didn’t mean that I didn’t still have room to grow. Now, although I am even more self-sufficient than I was three years ago, I try to approach every experience with the expectation that it will change me. It’s still difficult, but I understand that just because growth can be uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not important.

What the Essay Did Well

This is a nice essay because it delves into particular character trait of the student and how it has been shaped and matured over time. Although it doesn’t focus the essay around a specific anecdote, the essay is still successful because it is centered around this student’s independence. This is a nice approach for a personal statement: highlight a particular trait of yours and explore how it has grown with you.

The ideas in this essay are universal to growing up—living up to parents’ expectations, yearning for freedom, and coming to terms with reality—but it feels unique to the student because of the inclusion of details specific to them. Including their oboe lessons, the experience of riding the light rail by themselves, and the negotiations with a street vendor helps show the reader what these common tropes of growing up looked like for them personally. 

Another strength of the essay is the level of self-reflection included throughout the piece. Since there is no central anecdote tying everything together, an essay about a character trait is only successful when you deeply reflect on how you felt, where you made mistakes, and how that trait impacts your life. The author includes reflection in sentences like “ I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success, ” and “ I understand that just because growth can be uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not important. ” These sentences help us see how the student was impacted and what their point of view is.

What Could Be Improved

The largest change this essay would benefit from is to show not tell. The platitude you have heard a million times no doubt, but for good reason. This essay heavily relies on telling the reader what occurred, making us less engaged as the entire reading experience feels more passive. If the student had shown us what happens though, it keeps the reader tied to the action and makes them feel like they are there with the student, making it much more enjoyable to read. 

For example, they tell us about the pressure to succeed their parents placed on them: “ I pushed myself to get straight A’s, complied with years of oboe lessons, and dutifully attended hours of swim practice after school.”  They could have shown us what that pressure looked like with a sentence like this: “ My stomach turned somersaults as my rattling knee thumped against the desk before every test, scared to get anything less than a 95. For five years the painful squawk of the oboe only reminded me of my parents’ claps and whistles at my concerts. I mastered the butterfly, backstroke, and freestyle, fighting against the anchor of their expectations threatening to pull me down.”

If the student had gone through their essay and applied this exercise of bringing more detail and colorful language to sentences that tell the reader what happened, the essay would be really great. 

Table of Contents

Essay Example #2: Being Bangladeshi-American

Life before was good: verdant forests, sumptuous curries, and a devoted family.

Then, my family abandoned our comfortable life in Bangladesh for a chance at the American dream in Los Angeles. Within our first year, my father was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. He lost his battle three weeks before my sixth birthday. Facing a new country without the steady presence of my father, we were vulnerable — prisoners of hardship in the land of the free. We resettled in the Bronx, in my uncle’s renovated basement. It was meant to be our refuge, but I felt more displaced than ever. Gone were the high-rise condos of West L.A.; instead, government projects towered over the neighborhood. Pedestrians no longer smiled and greeted me; the atmosphere was hostile, even toxic. Schoolkids were quick to pick on those they saw as weak or foreign, hurling harsh words I’d never heard before.

Meanwhile, my family began integrating into the local Bangladeshi community. I struggled to understand those who shared my heritage. Bangladeshi mothers stayed home while fathers drove cabs and sold fruit by the roadside — painful societal positions. Riding on crosstown buses or walking home from school, I began to internalize these disparities. During my fleeting encounters with affluent Upper East Siders, I saw kids my age with nannies, parents who wore suits to work, and luxurious apartments with spectacular views. Most took cabs to their destinations: cabs that Bangladeshis drove. I watched the mundane moments of their lives with longing, aching to plant myself in their shoes. Shame prickled down my spine. I distanced myself from my heritage, rejecting the traditional panjabis worn on Eid and refusing the torkari we ate for dinner every day. 

As I grappled with my relationship with the Bangladeshi community, I turned my attention to helping my Bronx community by pursuing an internship with Assemblyman Luis Sepulveda. I handled desk work and took calls, spending the bulk of my time actively listening to the hardships constituents faced — everything from a veteran stripped of his benefits to a grandmother unable to support her bedridden grandchild.

I’d never exposed myself to stories like these, and now I was the first to hear them. As an intern, I could only assist in what felt like the small ways — pointing out local job offerings, printing information on free ESL classes, reaching out to non-profits. But to a community facing an onslaught of intense struggles, I realized that something as small as these actions could have vast impacts. Seeing the immediate consequences of my actions inspired me. Throughout that summer, I internalized my community’s daily challenges in a new light. I began to stop seeing the prevalent underemployment and cramped living quarters less as sources of shame. Instead, I saw them as realities that had to be acknowledged, but could ultimately be remedied. I also realized the benefits of the Bangladeshi culture I had been so ashamed of. My Bangla language skills were an asset to the office, and my understanding of Bangladeshi etiquette allowed for smooth communication between office staff and its constituents. As I helped my neighbors navigate city services, I saw my heritage with pride — a perspective I never expected to have.

I can now appreciate the value of my unique culture and background, and of living with less. This perspective offers room for progress, community integration, and a future worth fighting for. My time with Assemblyman Sepulveda’s office taught me that I can be a change agent in enabling this progression. Far from being ashamed of my community, I want to someday return to local politics in the Bronx to continue helping others access the American Dream. I hope to help my community appreciate the opportunity to make progress together. By embracing reality, I learned to live it. Along the way, I discovered one thing: life is good, but we can make it better.

This student’s passion for social justice and civic duty shines through in this essay because of how honest it is. Sharing their personal experience with immigrating, moving around, being an outsider, and finding a community allows us to see the hardships this student has faced and builds empathy towards their situation. However, what really makes it strong is that they go beyond describing the difficulties they faced and explain the mental impact it had on them as a child: Shame prickled down my spine. I distanced myself from my heritage, rejecting the traditional panjabis worn on Eid and refusing the torkari we ate for dinner every day. 

The rejection of their culture presented at the beginning of the essay creates a nice juxtaposition with the student’s view in the latter half of the essay and helps demonstrate how they have matured. They use their experience interning as a way to delve into a change in their thought process about their culture and show how their passion for social justice began. Using this experience as a mechanism to explore their thoughts and feelings is an excellent example of how items that are included elsewhere on your application should be incorporated into your essay.

This essay prioritizes emotions and personal views over specific anecdotes. Although there are details and certain moments incorporated throughout to emphasize the author’s points, the main focus remains on the student and how they grapple with their culture and identity.  

One area for improvement is the conclusion. Although the forward-looking approach is a nice way to end an essay focused on social justice, it would be nice to include more details and imagery in the conclusion. How does the student want to help their community? What government position do they see themselves holding one day? 

A more impactful ending might look like the student walking into their office at the New York City Housing Authority in 15 years and looking at the plans to build a new development in the Bronx just blocks away from where the grew up that would provide quality housing to people in their Bangladeshi community. They would smile while thinking about how far they have come from that young kid who used to be ashamed of their culture. 

Essay Example #3: Why Medicine

I took my first trip to China to visit my cousin Anna in July of 2014. Distance had kept us apart, but when we were together, we fell into all of our old inside jokes and caught up on each other’s lives. Her sparkling personality and optimistic attitude always brought a smile to my face. This time, however, my heart broke when I saw the effects of her brain cancer; she had suffered from a stroke that paralyzed her left side. She was still herself in many ways, but I could see that the damage to her brain made things difficult for her. I stayed by her every day, providing the support she needed, whether assisting her with eating and drinking, reading to her, or just watching “Friends.” During my flight back home, sorrow and helplessness overwhelmed me. Would I ever see Anna again? Could I have done more to make Anna comfortable? I wished I could stay in China longer to care for her. As I deplaned, I wondered if I could transform my grief to help other children and teenagers in the US who suffered as Anna did.

The day after I got home, as jet lag dragged me awake a few minutes after midnight, I remembered hearing about the Family Reach Foundation (FRF) and its work with children going through treatments at the local hospital and their families. I began volunteering in the FRF’s Children’s Activity Room, where I play with children battling cancer. Volunteering has both made me appreciate my own health and also cherish the new relationships I build with the children and families. We play sports, make figures out of playdoh, and dress up. When they take on the roles of firefighters or fairies, we all get caught up in the game; for that time, they forget the sanitized, stark, impersonal walls of the pediatric oncology ward. Building close relationships with them and seeing them giggle and laugh is so rewarding — I love watching them grow and get better throughout their course of treatment.

Hearing from the parents about their children’s condition and seeing the children recover inspired me to consider medical research. To get started, I enrolled in a summer collegelevel course in Abnormal Psychology. There I worked with Catelyn, a rising college senior, on a data analysis project regarding Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). Together, we examined the neurological etiology of DID by studying four fMRI and PET cases. I fell in love with gathering data and analyzing the results and was amazed by our final product: several stunning brain images showcasing the areas of hyper and hypoactivity in brains affected by DID. Desire quickly followed my amazement — I want to continue this project and study more brains. Their complexity, delicacy, and importance to every aspect of life fascinate me. Successfully completing this research project gave me a sense of hope; I know I am capable of participating in a large scale research project and potentially making a difference in someone else’s life through my research.

Anna’s diagnosis inspired me to begin volunteering at FRF; from there, I discovered my desire to help people further by contributing to medical research. As my research interest blossomed, I realized that it’s no coincidence that I want to study brains—after all, Anna suffered from brain cancer. Reflecting on these experiences this past year and a half, I see that everything I’ve done is connected. Sadly, a few months after I returned from China, Anna passed away. I am still sad, but as I run a toy truck across the floor and watch one of the little patients’ eyes light up, I imagine that she would be proud of my commitment to pursue medicine and study the brain.

This essay has a very strong emotional core that tugs at the heart strings and makes the reader feel invested. Writing about sickness can be difficult and doesn’t always belong in a personal statement, but in this case it works well because the focus is on how this student cared for her cousin and dealt with the grief and emotions surrounding her condition. Writing about the compassion she showed and the doubts and concerns that filled her mind keeps the focus on the author and her personality. 

This continues when she again discusses the activities she did with the kids at FRF and the personal reflection this experience allowed her to have. For example, she writes: Volunteering has both made me appreciate my own health and also cherish the new relationships I build with the children and families. We play sports, make figures out of playdoh, and dress up.

Concluding the essay with the sad story of her cousin’s passing brings the essay full circle and returns to the emotional heart of the piece to once again build a connection with the reader. However, it finishes on a hopeful note and demonstrates how this student has been able to turn a tragic experience into a source of lifelong inspiration. 

One thing this essay should be cognizant of is that personal statements should not read as summaries of your extracurricular resume. Although this essay doesn’t fully fall into that trap, it does describe two key extracurriculars the student participated in. However, the inclusion of such a strong emotional core running throughout the essay helps keep the focus on the student and her thoughts and feelings during these activities.

To avoid making this mistake, make sure you have a common thread running through your essay and the extracurriculars provide support to the story you are trying to tell, rather than crafting a story around your activities. And, as this essay does, make sure there is lots of personal reflection and feelings weaved throughout to focus attention to you rather than your extracurriculars. 

Essay Example #4: Love of Writing

“I want to be a writer.” This had been my answer to every youthful discussion with the adults in my life about what I would do when I grew up. As early as elementary school, I remember reading my writing pieces aloud to an audience at “Author of the Month” ceremonies. Bearing this goal in mind, and hoping to gain some valuable experience, I signed up for a journalism class during my freshman year. Despite my love for writing, I initially found myself uninterested in the subject and I struggled to enjoy the class. When I thought of writing, I imagined lyrical prose, profound poetry, and thrilling plot lines. Journalism required a laconic style and orderly structure, and I found my teacher’s assignments formulaic and dull. That class shook my confidence as a writer. I was uncertain if I should continue in it for the rest of my high school career.

Despite my misgivings, I decided that I couldn’t make a final decision on whether to quit journalism until I had some experience working for a paper outside of the classroom. The following year, I applied to be a staff reporter on our school newspaper. I hoped this would help me become more self-driven and creative, rather than merely writing articles that my teacher assigned. To my surprise, my time on staff was worlds away from what I experienced in the journalism class. Although I was unaccustomed to working in a fast-paced environment and initially found it burdensome to research and complete high-quality stories in a relatively short amount of time, I also found it exciting. I enjoyed learning more about topics and events on campus that I did not know much about; some of my stories that I covered in my first semester concerned a chess tournament, a food drive, and a Spanish immersion party. I relished in the freedom I had to explore and learn, and to write more independently than I could in a classroom.

Although I enjoyed many aspects of working for the paper immediately, reporting also pushed me outside of my comfort zone. I am a shy person, and speaking with people I did not know intimidated me. During my first interview, I met with the basketball coach to prepare for a story about the team’s winning streak. As I approached his office, I felt everything from my toes to my tongue freeze into a solid block, and I could hardly get out my opening questions. Fortunately, the coach was very kind and helped me through the conversation. Encouraged, I prepared for my next interview with more confidence. After a few weeks of practice, I even started to look forward to interviewing people on campus. That first journalism class may have bored me, but even if journalism in practice was challenging, it was anything but tedious.

Over the course of that year, I grew to love writing for our school newspaper. Reporting made me aware of my surroundings, and made me want to know more about current events on campus and in the town where I grew up. By interacting with people all over campus, I came to understand the breadth of individuals and communities that make up my high school. I felt far more connected to diverse parts of my school through my work as a journalist, and I realized that journalism gave me a window into seeing beyond my own experiences. The style of news writing may be different from what I used to think “writing” meant, but I learned that I can still derive exciting plots from events that may have gone unnoticed if not for my stories. I no longer struggle to approach others, and truly enjoy getting to know people and recognizing their accomplishments through my writing. Becoming a writer may be a difficult path, but it is as rewarding as I hoped when I was young.

This essay is clearly structured in a manner that makes it flow very nicely and contributes to its success. It starts with a quote to draw in the reader and show this student’s life-long passion for writing. Then it addresses the challenges of facing new, unfamiliar territory and how this student overcame it. Finally, it concludes by reflecting on this eye-opening experience and a nod to their younger self from the introduction. Having a well-thought out and sequential structure with clear transitions makes it extremely easy for the reader to follow along and take away the main idea.

Another positive aspect of the essay is the use of strong and expressive language. Sentences like “ When I thought of writing, I imagined lyrical prose, profound poetry, and thrilling plot lines ” stand out because of the intentional use of words like “lyrical”, “profound”, and “thrilling” to convey the student’s love of writing. The author also uses an active voice to capture the readers’ attention and keep us engaged. They rely on their language and diction to reveal details to the reader, for instance saying “ I felt everything from my toes to my tongue freeze into a solid block ” to describe feeling nervous.

This essay is already very strong, so there isn’t much that needs to be changed. One thing that could take the essay from great to outstanding would be to throw in more quotes, internal dialogue, and sensory descriptors.

It would be nice to see the nerves they felt interviewing the coach by including dialogue like “ Um…I want to interview you about…uh…”.  They could have shown their original distaste for journalism by narrating the thoughts running through their head. The fast-paced environment of their newspaper could have come to life with descriptions about the clacking of keyboards and the whirl of people running around laying out articles.

Essay Example #5: Starting a Fire

Was I no longer the beloved daughter of nature, whisperer of trees? Knee-high rubber boots, camouflage, bug spray—I wore the garb and perfume of a proud wild woman, yet there I was, hunched over the pathetic pile of stubborn sticks, utterly stumped, on the verge of tears. As a child, I had considered myself a kind of rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees, who could glide through tick-infested meadows and emerge Lyme-free. I knew the cracks of the earth like the scars on my own rough palms. Yet here I was, ten years later, incapable of performing the most fundamental outdoor task: I could not, for the life of me, start a fire. 

Furiously I rubbed the twigs together—rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers. No smoke. The twigs were too young, too sticky-green; I tossed them away with a shower of curses, and began tearing through the underbrush in search of a more flammable collection. My efforts were fruitless. Livid, I bit a rejected twig, determined to prove that the forest had spurned me, offering only young, wet bones that would never burn. But the wood cracked like carrots between my teeth—old, brittle, and bitter. Roaring and nursing my aching palms, I retreated to the tent, where I sulked and awaited the jeers of my family. 

Rattling their empty worm cans and reeking of fat fish, my brother and cousins swaggered into the campsite. Immediately, they noticed the minor stick massacre by the fire pit and called to me, their deep voices already sharp with contempt. 

“Where’s the fire, Princess Clara?” they taunted. “Having some trouble?” They prodded me with the ends of the chewed branches and, with a few effortless scrapes of wood on rock, sparked a red and roaring flame. My face burned long after I left the fire pit. The camp stank of salmon and shame. 

In the tent, I pondered my failure. Was I so dainty? Was I that incapable? I thought of my hands, how calloused and capable they had been, how tender and smooth they had become. It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive. And I’d gotten glasses, having grown horrifically nearsighted; long nights of dim lighting and thick books had done this. I couldn’t remember the last time I had lain down on a hill, barefaced, and seen the stars without having to squint. Crawling along the edge of the tent, a spider confirmed my transformation—he disgusted me, and I felt an overwhelming urge to squash him. 

Yet, I realized I hadn’t really changed—I had only shifted perspective. I still eagerly explored new worlds, but through poems and prose rather than pastures and puddles. I’d grown to prefer the boom of a bass over that of a bullfrog, learned to coax a different kind of fire from wood, having developed a burn for writing rhymes and scrawling hypotheses. 

That night, I stayed up late with my journal and wrote about the spider I had decided not to kill. I had tolerated him just barely, only shrieking when he jumped—it helped to watch him decorate the corners of the tent with his delicate webs, knowing that he couldn’t start fires, either. When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.

This student is an excellent writer, which allows a simple story to be outstandingly compelling. The author articulates her points beautifully and creatively through her immense use of details and figurative language. Lines like “a rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees,” and “rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers,” create vivid images that draw the reader in. 

The flowery and descriptive prose also contributes to the nice juxtaposition between the old Clara and the new Clara. The latter half of the essay contrasts elements of nature with music and writing to demonstrate how natural these interests are for her now. This sentence perfectly encapsulates the contrast she is trying to build: “It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive.”

In addition to being well-written, this essay is thematically cohesive. It begins with the simple introduction “Fire!” and ends with the following image: “When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.” This full-circle approach leaves readers satisfied and impressed.

There is very little this essay should change, however one thing to be cautious about is having an essay that is overly-descriptive. We know from the essay that this student likes to read and write, and depending on other elements of her application, it might make total sense to have such a flowery and ornate writing style. However, your personal statement needs to reflect your voice as well as your personality. If you would never use language like this in conversation or your writing, don’t put it in your personal statement. Make sure there is a balance between eloquence and your personal voice.

Essay Example #6: Dedicating a Track

“Getting beat is one thing – it’s part of competing – but I want no part in losing.” Coach Rob Stark’s motto never fails to remind me of his encouragement on early-morning bus rides to track meets around the state. I’ve always appreciated the phrase, but an experience last June helped me understand its more profound, universal meaning.

Stark, as we affectionately call him, has coached track at my high school for 25 years. His care, dedication, and emphasis on developing good character has left an enduring impact on me and hundreds of other students. Not only did he help me discover my talent and love for running, but he also taught me the importance of commitment and discipline and to approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running. When I learned a neighboring high school had dedicated their track to a longtime coach, I felt that Stark deserved similar honors.

Our school district’s board of education indicated they would only dedicate our track to Stark if I could demonstrate that he was extraordinary. I took charge and mobilized my teammates to distribute petitions, reach out to alumni, and compile statistics on the many team and individual champions Stark had coached over the years. We received astounding support, collecting almost 3,000 signatures and pages of endorsements from across the community. With help from my teammates, I presented this evidence to the board.

They didn’t bite. 

Most members argued that dedicating the track was a low priority. Knowing that we had to act quickly to convince them of its importance, I called a team meeting where we drafted a rebuttal for the next board meeting. To my surprise, they chose me to deliver it. I was far from the best public speaker in the group, and I felt nervous about going before the unsympathetic board again. However, at that second meeting, I discovered that I enjoy articulating and arguing for something that I’m passionate about.

Public speaking resembles a cross country race. Walking to the starting line, you have to trust your training and quell your last minute doubts. When the gun fires, you can’t think too hard about anything; your performance has to be instinctual, natural, even relaxed. At the next board meeting, the podium was my starting line. As I walked up to it, familiar butterflies fluttered in my stomach. Instead of the track stretching out in front of me, I faced the vast audience of teachers, board members, and my teammates. I felt my adrenaline build, and reassured myself: I’ve put in the work, my argument is powerful and sound. As the board president told me to introduce myself, I heard, “runners set” in the back of my mind. She finished speaking, and Bang! The brief silence was the gunshot for me to begin. 

The next few minutes blurred together, but when the dust settled, I knew from the board members’ expressions and the audience’s thunderous approval that I had run quite a race. Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough; the board voted down our proposal. I was disappointed, but proud of myself, my team, and our collaboration off the track. We stood up for a cause we believed in, and I overcame my worries about being a leader. Although I discovered that changing the status quo through an elected body can be a painstakingly difficult process and requires perseverance, I learned that I enjoy the challenges this effort offers. Last month, one of the school board members joked that I had become a “regular” – I now often show up to meetings to advocate for a variety of causes, including better environmental practices in cafeterias and safer equipment for athletes.

Just as Stark taught me, I worked passionately to achieve my goal. I may have been beaten when I appealed to the board, but I certainly didn’t lose, and that would have made Stark proud.

This essay effectively conveys this student’s compassion for others, initiative, and determination—all great qualities to exemplify in a personal statement!

Although they rely on telling us a lot of what happened up until the board meeting, the use of running a race (their passion) as a metaphor for public speaking provides a lot of insight into the fear that this student overcame to work towards something bigger than themself. Comparing a podium to the starting line, the audience to the track, and silence to the gunshot is a nice way of demonstrating this student’s passion for cross country running without making that the focus of the story.

The essay does a nice job of coming full circle at the end by explaining what the quote from the beginning meant to them after this experience. Without explicitly saying “ I now know that what Stark actually meant is…” they rely on the strength of their argument above to make it obvious to the reader what it means to get beat but not lose. 

One of the biggest areas of improvement in the intro, however, is how the essay tells us Stark’s impact rather than showing us: His care, dedication, and emphasis on developing good character has left an enduring impact on me and hundreds of other students. Not only did he help me discover my talent and love for running, but he also taught me the importance of commitment and discipline and to approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running.

The writer could’ve helped us feel a stronger emotional connection to Stark if they had included examples of Stark’s qualities, rather than explicitly stating them. For example, they could’ve written something like: Stark was the kind of person who would give you gas money if you told him your parents couldn’t afford to pick you up from practice. And he actually did that—several times. At track meets, alumni regularly would come talk to him and tell him how he’d changed their lives. Before Stark, I was ambivalent about running and was on the JV team, but his encouragement motivated me to run longer and harder and eventually make varsity. Because of him, I approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running.

Essay Example #7: Body Image and Eating Disorders

I press the “discover” button on my Instagram app, hoping to find enticing pictures to satisfy my boredom. Scrolling through, I see funny videos and mouth-watering pictures of food. However, one image stops me immediately. A fit teenage girl with a “perfect body” relaxes in a bikini on a beach. Beneath it, I see a slew of flattering comments. I shake with disapproval over the image’s unrealistic quality. However, part of me still wants to have a body like hers so that others will make similar comments to me.

I would like to resolve a silent issue that harms many teenagers and adults: negative self image and low self-esteem in a world where social media shapes how people view each other. When people see the façades others wear to create an “ideal” image, they can develop poor thought patterns rooted in negative self-talk. The constant comparisons to “perfect” others make people feel small. In this new digital age, it is hard to distinguish authentic from artificial representations.

When I was 11, I developed anorexia nervosa. Though I was already thin, I wanted to be skinny like the models that I saw on the magazine covers on the grocery store stands. Little did I know that those models probably also suffered from disorders, and that photoshop erased their flaws. I preferred being underweight to being healthy. No matter how little I ate or how thin I was, I always thought that I was too fat. I became obsessed with the number on the scale and would try to eat the least that I could without my parents urging me to take more. Fortunately, I stopped engaging in anorexic behaviors before middle school. However, my underlying mental habits did not change. The images that had provoked my disorder in the first place were still a constant presence in my life.

By age 15, I was in recovery from anorexia, but suffered from depression. While I used to only compare myself to models, the growth of social media meant I also compared myself to my friends and acquaintances. I felt left out when I saw my friends’ excitement about lake trips they had taken without me. As I scrolled past endless photos of my flawless, thin classmates with hundreds of likes and affirming comments, I felt my jealousy spiral. I wanted to be admired and loved by other people too. However, I felt that I could never be enough. I began to hate the way that I looked, and felt nothing in my life was good enough. I wanted to be called “perfect” and “body goals,” so I tried to only post at certain times of day to maximize my “likes.” When that didn’t work, I started to feel too anxious to post anything at all.  

Body image insecurities and social media comparisons affect thousands of people – men, women, children, and adults – every day. I am lucky – after a few months of my destructive social media habits, I came across a video that pointed out the illusory nature of social media; many Instagram posts only show off good things while people hide their flaws. I began going to therapy, and recovered from my depression. To address the problem of self-image and social media, we can all focus on what matters on the inside and not what is on the surface. As an effort to become healthy internally, I started a club at my school to promote clean eating and radiating beauty from within. It has helped me grow in my confidence, and today I’m not afraid to show others my struggles by sharing my experience with eating disorders. Someday, I hope to make this club a national organization to help teenagers and adults across the country. I support the idea of body positivity and embracing difference, not “perfection.” After all, how can we be ourselves if we all look the same?

This essay covers the difficult topics of eating disorders and mental health. If you’re thinking about covering similar topics in your essay, we recommend reading our post Should You Talk About Mental Health in College Essays?

The short answer is that, yes, you can talk about mental health, but it can be risky. If you do go that route, it’s important to focus on what you learned from the experience.

The strength of this essay is the student’s vulnerability, in excerpts such as this: I wanted to be admired and loved by other people too. However, I felt that I could never be enough. I began to hate the way that I looked, and felt nothing in my life was good enough. I wanted to be called “perfect” and “body goals,” so I tried to only post at certain times of day to maximize my “likes.”

The student goes on to share how they recovered from their depression through an eye-opening video and therapy sessions, and they’re now helping others find their self-worth as well. It’s great that this essay looks towards the future and shares the writer’s goals of making their club a national organization; we can see their ambition and compassion.

The main weakness of this essay is that it doesn’t focus enough on their recovery process, which is arguably the most important part. They could’ve told us more about the video they watched or the process of starting their club and the interactions they’ve had with other members. Especially when sharing such a vulnerable topic, there should be vulnerability in the recovery process too. That way, the reader can fully appreciate all that this student has overcome.

Essay Example #8: Becoming a Coach

”Advanced females ages 13 to 14 please proceed to staging with your coaches at this time.” Skittering around the room, eyes wide and pleading, I frantically explained my situation to nearby coaches. The seconds ticked away in my head; every polite refusal increased my desperation.

Despair weighed me down. I sank to my knees as a stream of competitors, coaches, and officials flowed around me. My dojang had no coach, and the tournament rules prohibited me from competing without one.

Although I wanted to remain strong, doubts began to cloud my mind. I could not help wondering: what was the point of perfecting my skills if I would never even compete? The other members of my team, who had found coaches minutes earlier, attempted to comfort me, but I barely heard their words. They couldn’t understand my despair at being left on the outside, and I never wanted them to understand.

Since my first lesson 12 years ago, the members of my dojang have become family. I have watched them grow up, finding my own happiness in theirs. Together, we have honed our kicks, blocks, and strikes. We have pushed one another to aim higher and become better martial artists. Although my dojang had searched for a reliable coach for years, we had not found one. When we attended competitions in the past, my teammates and I had always gotten lucky and found a sympathetic coach. Now, I knew this practice was unsustainable. It would devastate me to see the other members of my dojang in my situation, unable to compete and losing hope as a result. My dojang needed a coach, and I decided it was up to me to find one.

I first approached the adults in the dojang – both instructors and members’ parents. However, these attempts only reacquainted me with polite refusals. Everyone I asked told me they couldn’t devote multiple weekends per year to competitions. I soon realized that I would have become the coach myself.

At first, the inner workings of tournaments were a mystery to me. To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side. I learned everything from motivational strategies to technical, behind-the-scenes components of Taekwondo competitions. Though I emerged with new knowledge and confidence in my capabilities, others did not share this faith.

Parents threw me disbelieving looks when they learned that their children’s coach was only a child herself. My self-confidence was my armor, deflecting their surly glances. Every armor is penetrable, however, and as the relentless barrage of doubts pounded my resilience, it began to wear down. I grew unsure of my own abilities.

Despite the attack, I refused to give up. When I saw the shining eyes of the youngest students preparing for their first competition, I knew I couldn’t let them down. To quit would be to set them up to be barred from competing like I was. The knowledge that I could solve my dojang’s longtime problem motivated me to overcome my apprehension.

Now that my dojang flourishes at competitions, the attacks on me have weakened, but not ended. I may never win the approval of every parent; at times, I am still tormented by doubts, but I find solace in the fact that members of my dojang now only worry about competing to the best of their abilities.

Now, as I arrive at a tournament with my students, I close my eyes and remember the past. I visualize the frantic search for a coach and the chaos amongst my teammates as we competed with one another to find coaches before the staging calls for our respective divisions. I open my eyes to the exact opposite scene. Lacking a coach hurt my ability to compete, but I am proud to know that no member of my dojang will have to face that problem again.

This essay begins with an in-the-moment narrative that really illustrates the chaos of looking for a coach last-minute. We feel the writer’s emotions, particularly her dejectedness, at not being able to compete. Starting an essay in media res  is a great way to capture the attention of your readers and build anticipation for what comes next.

Through this essay, we can see how gutsy and determined the student is in deciding to become a coach themselves. She shows us these characteristics through their actions, rather than explicitly telling us: To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side.  Also, by discussing the opposition she faced and how it affected her, the student is open and vulnerable about the reality of the situation.

The essay comes full circle as the author recalls the frantic situations in seeking out a coach, but this is no longer a concern for them and their team. Overall, this essay is extremely effective in painting this student as mature, bold, and compassionate.

The biggest thing this essay needs to work on is showing not telling. Throughout the essay, the student tells us that she “emerged with new knowledge and confidence,” she “grew unsure of her own abilities,” and she “refused to give up”. What we really want to know is what this looks like.

Instead of saying she “emerged with new knowledge and confidence” she should have shared how she taught a new move to a fellow team-member without hesitation. Rather than telling us she “grew unsure of her own abilities” she should have shown what that looked like by including her internal dialogue and rhetorical questions that ran through her mind. She could have demonstrated what “refusing to give up” looks like by explaining how she kept learning coaching techniques on her own, turned to a mentor for advice, or devised a plan to win over the trust of parents. 

Essay Example #9: Eritrea

No one knows where Eritrea is.

On the first day of school, for the past nine years, I would pensively stand in front of a class, a teacher, a stranger  waiting for the inevitable question: Where are you from?

I smile politely, my dimples accentuating my ambiguous features. “Eritrea,” I answer promptly and proudly. But I  am always prepared. Before their expression can deepen into confusion, ready to ask “where is that,” I elaborate,  perhaps with a fleeting hint of exasperation, “East Africa, near Ethiopia.”

Sometimes, I single out the key-shaped hermit nation on a map, stunning teachers who have “never had a student  from there!” Grinning, I resist the urge to remark, “You didn’t even know it existed until two minutes ago!”

Eritrea is to the East of Ethiopia, its arid coastline clutches the lucrative Red Sea. Battle scars litter the ancient  streets – the colonial Italian architecture lathered with bullet holes, the mosques mangled with mortar shells.  Originally part of the world’s first Christian kingdom, Eritrea passed through the hands of colonial Italy, Britain, and  Ethiopia for over a century, until a bloody thirty year war of Independence liberated us.

But these are facts that anyone can know with a quick Google search. These are facts that I have memorised and compounded, first from my Grandmother and now from pristine books  borrowed from the library.

No historical narrative, however, can adequately capture what Eritrea is.  No one knows the aroma of bushels of potatoes, tomatoes, and garlic – still covered in dirt – that leads you to the open-air market. No one knows the poignant scent of spices, arranged in orange piles reminiscent of compacted  dunes.  No one knows how to haggle stubborn herders for sheep and roosters for Christmas celebrations as deliberately as my mother. No one can replicate the perfect balance of spices in dorho and tsebhi as well as my grandmother,  her gnarly hands stirring the pot with ancient precision (chastising my clumsy knife work with the potatoes).  It’s impossible to learn when the injera is ready – the exact moment you have to lift the lid of the mogogo. Do it too  early (or too late) and the flatbread becomes mangled and gross. It is a sixth sense passed through matriarchal  lineages.

There are no sources that catalogue the scent of incense that wafts through the sunlit porch on St. Michael’s; no  films that can capture the luminescence of hundreds of flaming bonfires that fluoresce the sidewalks on Kudus  Yohannes, as excited children chant Ge’ez proverbs whose origin has been lost to time.  You cannot learn the familiarity of walking beneath the towering Gothic figure of the Enda Mariam Cathedral, the  crowds undulating to the ringing of the archaic bells.  I have memorized the sound of the rains hounding the metal roof during kiremti , the heat of the sun pounding  against the Toyota’s window as we sped down towards Ghinda , the opulent brilliance of the stars twinkling in a  sky untainted by light pollution, the scent of warm rolls of bani wafting through the streets at precisely 6 o’clock each day…

I fill my flimsy sketchbook with pictures from my memory. My hand remembers the shapes of the hibiscus drifting  in the wind, the outline of my grandmother (affectionately nicknamed a’abaye ) leaning over the garden, the bizarre architecture of the Fiat Tagliero .  I dice the vegetables with movements handed down from generations. My nose remembers the scent of frying garlic, the sourness of the warm tayta , the sharpness of the mit’mt’a …

This knowledge is intrinsic.  “I am Eritrean,” I repeat. “I am proud.”  Within me is an encyclopedia of history, culture, and idealism.

Eritrea is the coffee made from scratch, the spices drying in the sun, the priests and nuns. Eritrea is wise, filled with ambition, and unseen potential.  Eritrea isn’t a place, it’s an identity.

This is an exceptional essay that provides a window into this student’s culture that really makes their love for their country and heritage leap off the page. The sheer level of details and sensory descriptors this student is able to fit in this space makes the essay stand out. From the smells, to the traditions, sounds, and sights, the author encapsulates all the glory of Eritrea for the reader. 

The vivid images this student is able to create for the reader, whether it is having the tedious conversation with every teacher or cooking in their grandmother’s kitchen, transports us into the story and makes us feel like we are there in the moment with the student. This is a prime example of an essay that shows , not tells.

Besides the amazing imagery, the use of shorter paragraphs also contributes to how engaging this essay is. Employing this tactic helps break up the text to make it more readable and it isolates ideas so they stick out more than if they were enveloped in a large paragraph.

Overall, this is a really strong essay that brings to life this student’s heritage through its use of vivid imagery. This essay exemplifies what it means to show not tell in your writing, and it is a great example of how you can write an intimate personal statement without making yourself the primary focus of your essay. 

There is very little this essay should improve upon, but one thing the student might consider would be to inject more personal reflection into their response. Although we can clearly take away their deep love and passion for their homeland and culture, the essay would be a bit more personal if they included the emotions and feelings they associate with the various aspects of Eritrea. For example, the way their heart swells with pride when their grandmother praises their ability to cook a flatbread or the feeling of serenity when they hear the bells ring out from the cathedral. Including personal details as well as sensory ones would create a wonderful balance of imagery and reflection.

Essay Example #10: Journaling

Flipping past dozens of colorful entries in my journal, I arrive at the final blank sheet. I press my pen lightly to the page, barely scratching its surface to create a series of loops stringing together into sentences. Emotions spill out, and with their release, I feel lightness in my chest. The stream of thoughts slows as I reach the bottom of the page, and I gently close the cover of the worn book: another journal finished.

I add the journal to the stack of eleven books on my nightstand. Struck by the bittersweet sensation of closing a chapter of my life, I grab the notebook at the bottom of the pile to reminisce.

“I want to make a flying mushen to fly in space and your in it” – October 2008

Pulling back the cover of my first Tinkerbell-themed diary, the prompt “My Hopes and Dreams” captures my attention. Though “machine” is misspelled in my scribbled response, I see the beginnings of my past obsession with outer space. At the age of five, I tore through novels about the solar system, experimented with rockets built from plastic straws, and rented Space Shuttle films from Blockbuster to satisfy my curiosities. While I chased down answers to questions as limitless as the universe, I fell in love with learning. Eight journals later, the same relentless curiosity brought me to an airplane descending on San Francisco Bay.

“I wish I had infinite sunsets” – July 2019

I reach for the charcoal notepad near the top of the pile and open to the first page: my flight to the Stanford Pre-Collegiate Summer Institutes. While I was excited to explore bioengineering, anxiety twisted in my stomach as I imagined my destination, unsure of whether I could overcome my shyness and connect with others.

With each new conversation, the sweat on my palms became less noticeable, and I met students from 23 different countries. Many of the moments where I challenged myself socially revolved around the third story deck of the Jerry house. A strange medley of English, Arabic, and Mandarin filled the summer air as my friends and I gathered there every evening, and dialogues at sunset soon became moments of bliss. In our conversations about cultural differences, the possibility of an afterlife, and the plausibility of far-fetched conspiracy theories, I learned to voice my opinion. As I was introduced to different viewpoints, these moments challenged my understanding of the world around me. In my final entries from California, I find excitement to learn from others and increased confidence, a tool that would later allow me to impact my community.

“The beauty in a tower of cans” – June 2020

Returning my gaze to the stack of journals, I stretch to take the floral-patterned book sitting on top. I flip through, eventually finding the beginnings of the organization I created during the outbreak of COVID-19. Since then, Door-to-Door Deliveries has woven its way through my entries and into reality, allowing me to aid high-risk populations through free grocery delivery.

With the confidence I gained the summer before, I took action when seeing others in need rather than letting my shyness hold me back. I reached out to local churches and senior centers to spread word of our services and interacted with customers through our website and social media pages. To further expand our impact, we held two food drives, and I mustered the courage to ask for donations door-to-door. In a tower of canned donations, I saw the value of reaching out to help others and realized my own potential to impact the world around me.

I delicately close the journal in my hands, smiling softly as the memories reappear, one after another. Reaching under my bed, I pull out a fresh notebook and open to its first sheet. I lightly press my pen to the page, “And so begins the next chapter…”

The structuring of this essay makes it easy and enjoyable to read. The student effectively organizes their various life experiences around their tower of journals, which centers the reader and makes the different stories easy to follow. Additionally, the student engages quotes from their journals—and unique formatting of the quotes—to signal that they are moving in time and show us which memory we should follow them to.

Thematically, the student uses the idea of shyness to connect the different memories they draw out of their journals. As the student describes their experiences overcoming shyness at the Stanford Pre-Collegiate Summer Institutes and Door-to-Door Deliveries, this essay can be read as an Overcoming Obstacles essay.

At the end of this essay, readers are fully convinced that this student is dedicated (they have committed to journaling every day), thoughtful (journaling is a thoughtful process and, in the essay, the student reflects thoughtfully on the past), and motivated (they flew across the country for a summer program and started a business). These are definitely qualities admissions officers are looking for in applicants!

Although this essay is already exceptionally strong as it’s written, the first journal entry feels out of place compared to the other two entries that discuss the author’s shyness and determination. It works well for the essay to have an entry from when the student was younger to add some humor (with misspelled words) and nostalgia, but if the student had either connected the quote they chose to the idea of overcoming a fear present in the other two anecdotes or if they had picked a different quote all together related to their shyness, it would have made the entire essay feel more cohesive.

Where to Get Your Personal Statement Edited

Do you want feedback on your personal statement? After rereading your essays countless times, it can be difficult to evaluate your writing objectively. That’s why we created our free Peer Essay Review tool , where you can get a free review of your essay from another student. You can also improve your own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays. 

If you want a college admissions expert to review your essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools. Find the right advisor for you to improve your chances of getting into your dream school!

Next Step: Supplemental Essays

Essay Guides for Each School

How to Write a Stellar Extracurricular Activity College Essay

4 Tips for Writing a Diversity College Essay

How to Write the “Why This College” Essay

Related CollegeVine Blog Posts

my personal motivation essay

Motivation Essay for Students and Children

500+ words essay on motivation.

Everyone suggests other than the person lack motivation, or directly suggests the person remain motivated. But, no one ever tells what is the motivation of how one can stay motivated. Motivation means to face the obstacle and find an inspiration that helps you to go through tough times. In addition, it helps you to move further in life.

Motivation Essay

Meaning of Motivation

Motivation is something that cannot be understood with words but with practice. It means to be moved by something so strongly that it becomes an inspiration for you. Furthermore, it is a discipline that helps you to achieve your life goals and also helps to be successful in life .

Besides, it the most common practice that everyone does whether it is your boss in office or a school teacher or a university professor everyone motivates others in a way or other.

Role of Motivation

It is a strong tool that helps to get ahead in life. For being motivated we need a driving tool or goal that keeps us motivated and moves forward. Also, it helps in being progressive both physically and mentally.

Moreover, your goal does not be to big and long term they can be small and empowering. Furthermore, you need the right mindset to be motivated.

Besides, you need to push your self towards your goal no one other than you can push your limit. Also, you should be willing to leave your comfort zone because your true potential is going to revel when you leave your comfort zone.

Types of Motivation

Although there are various types of motivation according to me there are generally two types of motivation that are self- motivation and motivation by others.

Self-motivation- It refers to the power of someone to stay motivated without the influence of other situations and people. Furthermore, self-motivated people always find a way to reason and strength to complete a task. Also, they do not need other people to encourage them to perform a challenging task.

Motivation by others- This motivation requires help from others as the person is not able to maintain a self-motivated state. In this, a person requires encouragement from others. Also, he needs to listen to motivational speeches, a strong goal and most importantly and inspiration.

Get the huge list of more than 500 Essay Topics and Ideas

Importance of Motivation

Motivation is very important for the overall development of the personality and mind of the people. It also puts a person in action and in a competitive state. Furthermore, it improves efficiency and desire to achieve the goal. It leads to stability and improvement in work.

Above all, it satisfies a person’s needs and to achieve his/her goal. It helps the person to fight his negative attitude. The person also tries to come out of his/her comfort zone so that she/ he can achieve the goal.

To conclude, motivation is one of the key elements that help a person to be successful. A motivated person tries to push his limits and always tries to improve his performance day by day. Also, the person always gives her/his best no matter what the task is. Besides, the person always tries to remain progressive and dedicated to her/his goals.

FAQs about Motivation Essay

Q.1 Define what is motivation fit. A.1 This refers to a psychological phenomenon in which a person assumes or expects something from the job or life but gets different results other than his expectations. In a profession, it is a primary criterion for determining if the person will stay or leave the job.

Q.2 List some best motivators. A.2 some of the best motivators are:

  • Inspiration
  • Fear of failure
  • Power of Rejection
  • Don’t pity your self
  • Be assertive
  • Stay among positive and motivated people
  • Be calm and visionary

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How to Write a Personal Essay for Your College Application

my personal motivation essay

What does it take to land in the “accept” (instead of “reject”) pile?

How can you write an essay that helps advance you in the eyes of the admissions officers and makes a real impression? Here are some tips to get you started.

  • Start early.  Do not leave it until the last minute. Give yourself time when you don’t have other homework or extracurriculars hanging over your head to work on the essay.
  • Keep the focus narrow.  Your essay does not have to cover a massive, earth-shattering event. Some people in their teens haven’t experienced a major life event. Some people have. Either way, it’s okay.
  • Be yourself.  Whether writing about a painful experience or a more simple experience, use the narrative to be vulnerable and honest about who you are. Use words you would normally use. Trust your voice and the fact that your story is interesting enough in that no one else has lived it.
  • Be creative.  “Show, don’t tell,” and that applies here — to an extent. The best essays typically do both. You can help your reader see and feel what you are describing by using some figurative language throughout your piece.
  • Make a point. As you finish your final body paragraphs ask yourself “So what?” This will help you hone in on how to end your essay in a way that elevates it into a story about an insight or discovery you made about yourself, rather than just being about an experience you had.

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Where your work meets your life. See more from Ascend here .

We’ve all heard about the dreaded “college essay,” the bane of every high school senior’s existence. This daunting element of the college application is something that can create angst for even the most accomplished students.

  • AA Amy Allen is a writer, educator, and lifelong learner. Her freelance writing business,  All of the Write Words , focuses on providing high school students with one-on-one feedback to guide them through the college application process and with crafting a thoughtful personal essay. A dedicated poet, Amy’s work has also been published in several journals including  Pine Row Press ,  Months to Years,  and  Atlanta Review .

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Self-Motivation Explained + 100 Ways To Motivate Yourself

What is Self-Motivation? 100+ Ways to Motivate Yourself (Definition + Quotes)

To demonstrate this point, let’s consider two scenarios you’ve likely experienced:

  • You have something you have to do . You’re not excited or passionate about it, but you know you need to get it done. This feeling of obligation motivates you to work hard to complete the task;
  • You have something you get to do . You’re interested in your task—you might have even assigned this task for yourself rather than receiving it from someone else—and you are happy to put in the time and effort to complete it.

In which scenario are you more effective? In which scenario are you more efficient? And, in which scenario do you feel the most fulfilled?

I’m willing to bet that your answer to each of those questions is Scenario 2.

It likely won’t come as a surprise that doing something for its own sake and for your own purposes is likely to be more fulfilling, enjoyable, and successful than doing something to meet external standards or to please others.

The feeling described in Scenario 2 is that of being self-motivated . Read on to learn more about self-motivation and why it’s the most effective kind of motivation.

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Goal Achievement Exercises for free . These detailed, science-based exercises will help you or your clients create actionable goals and master techniques to create lasting behavior change.

This Article Contains:

  • What Is the Meaning of Self-Motivation?

3 Examples of Self-Motivation

The psychology of self-motivation: how are self-efficacy and motivation related, the importance of self-motivation, is self-motivation a skill and can it be developed through training, how to foster self-motivation in the workplace, research on self-motivation.

  • 17 Activities, Exercises, and Worksheets for Self-Motivation (PDF)

5 Meditations to Promote Self-Motivation

Self-motivation quizzes, questionnaires, and tests, apps for increasing self-motivation, popular podcasts on self-motivation, 22 quotes and messages to ignite self-motivation, 6 images to inspire self-motivation, 15 recommended movies to get yourself motivated, ted talks, speeches, and videos on self-motivation, 7 books on self-motivation, a take-home message, what is the meaning of self-motivation.

Above, we explored a basic example of self-motivation, but here’s a succinct definition of the concept:

“Self-motivation is, in its simplest form, the force that drives you to do things”

(Skills You Need, n.d.).

It’s the drive you have to work toward your goals, to put effort into self-development, and to achieve personal fulfillment.

It’s important to note here that self-motivation is generally driven by intrinsic motivation, a kind of motivation that comes from sincerely wanting to achieve and desiring the inherent rewards associated with it.

Self-motivation can also be driven by extrinsic motivation, the drive to achieve that comes from wanting the external rewards (like money, power, status, or recognition), although it’s clear that intrinsic motivation is usually a more effective and fulfilling drive.

Self-Motivation and Emotional Intelligence

According to emotional intelligence expert Daniel Goleman, self-motivation is a key component of emotional intelligence . Emotional intelligence is the measure of one’s ability to recognize and manage his or her own emotions and the emotions of other people.

Self-motivation’s relevance to emotional intelligence highlights its role within our ability to understand ourselves, relate to others, and succeed in reaching our goals .

Goleman states that there are four components of motivation:

  • Achievement drive, or the personal drive to achieve, improve, and meet certain standards;
  • Commitment to your own personal goals;
  • Initiative, or the “readiness to act on opportunities”;
  • Optimism, or the tendency to look ahead and persevere with the belief that you can reach your goals (Skills You Need, n.d.).

What is Self-Motivation? examples

  • A man who goes to work every only as a means to pay the bills, keep his family off his back, and please his boss is not self-motivated, while a man who needs no external forces to make the trek into work every day and finds fulfillment in what he does is self-motivated;
  • The student who only completes her homework because her parents remind her or nag her, or because they ground her when she fails to complete it is not self-motivated, but the student who completes her homework with no prodding because she wants to learn and succeed in school is self-motivated;
  • The woman who only goes to the gym when her friends drag her there or because her doctor is adamant that she needs to exercise to get healthy is not self-motivated, but the woman who likes the way exercise makes her feel and schedules time at the gym whether or not anyone encourages her is self-motivated.

As you can see, self-motivation is all about where your drive comes from; if your motivation comes from within and pushes you to achieve for your own personal reasons, it can be considered self-motivation.

If you are only motivated to achieve standards set by someone else and not for your own internal satisfaction, you are probably not self-motivated.

It’s possible to be self-motivated in some areas and not in others. For example, if the man from the first example is not internally motivated to go to work but is sure to make time for his marathon training, he is not self-motivated when it comes to work but might be self-motivated to run.

my personal motivation essay

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Psychologist Scott Geller is at the forefront of research on self-motivation, and he explains that there are three questions you can use to determine whether you (or someone in your life) is self-motivated:

  • Can you do it?
  • Will it work?
  • Is it worth it?

If you answered “yes” to each question, you are likely self-motivated.

If you believe you can do it, you have self-efficacy . If you believe it will work, you have response efficacy—belief that the action you are taking will lead to the outcome you want. And if you believe it is worth it, you have weighed the cost against the consequences and decided the consequences outweigh the cost (Geller, 2016).

Speaking of consequences, Geller considers “consequences” to be one of four vital “C” words that underpin self-motivation:

  • Consequences: To be self-motivated, you sincerely have to want the consequences associated with the actions you take rather than simply doing something to avoid negative consequences;
  • Competence: If you answer all three of the questions above with a “yes,” you will feel competent in your ability to get things done;
  • Choice: Having a sense of autonomy over your actions encourages self-motivation;
  • Community: Having social support and connections with others is critical for feeling motivated and believing in yourself and your power to achieve (Geller, 2016).

Much of Geller’s work on self-motivation is grounded in the research of psychologist and self-efficacy researcher Albert Bandura . In 1981, Bandura set the stage for Geller’s current conceptualization of self-motivation with this description:

“Self-motivation . . . requires personal standards against which to evaluate ongoing performance. By making self-satisfaction conditional on a certain level of performance, individuals create self-inducements to persist in their efforts until their performances match internal standards. Both the anticipated satisfactions for matching attainments and the dissatisfactions with insufficient ones provide incentives for self-directed actions”

(Bandura & Schunk, 1981).

From this quote, you can see where Geller’s three questions come from. Believing that you can do it, that it will work, and that it is worth it will drive you to match the internal standards you set for yourself.

We explore this further in The Science of Self-Acceptance Masterclass© .

The DARN-C acronym is a commonly used tool in motivational interviewing. Motivational interviewing is a directive, client-centered treatment that enhances intrinsic motivation to make positive life changes (Miller & Rollnick, 2013).

The DARN-C acronym stands for desire , ability , reason , need , and commitment , which builds the basis of change talk.

1. Desire indicates precisely what the client wants and wishes for. This desire is the motivating factor for change. 2. The ability component of motivation is necessary because clients must believe that they can change, so a realistic perspective on how achievable this change can be is needed. 3. The reason for the change can be motivated by current pitfalls, benefits of a changed future, or aspects of both. 4. The need indicates the urgency of the change without specifying the underlying reason. The needs that arise during motivational interviewing questions reflect the importance of the shift to the individual. 5. Lastly, commitment is about specific actions that the client will take to change, an understanding of how to convert intentions into concrete action plans.

my personal motivation essay

As you have likely already guessed, self-motivation is an important concept. While pleasing others and meeting external standards can certainly motivate us to get things done, such efforts aren’t exactly labors of love.

In other words, doing things because we feel we have to do them or to gain some external reward is enough in many cases, but it doesn’t invoke the passion needed to drive innovation and excellence.

It’s fine to use external sources to motivate you in some areas, but external motivation is less likely to leave you feeling personally fulfilled and finding deeper meaning in your life .

Not only do we generally do better work when we are self-motivated, but we are also better able to cope with stress and are simply happier when we are doing what we want to be doing.

Is Self-Motivation a Skill and Can It Be Developed Through Training?

The answer is a definite “yes.”

Self-motivation is driven by a set of skills that are within your control. Read on to learn how to use this to your advantage.

12 Tips and Skills to Motivate Yourself Today

The Skills You Need website lists six vital skills that form the foundation of self-motivation, and they are all skills that you can develop through sustained effort:

  • Setting high but realistic goals (e.g., SMART goals);
  • Taking the right level of risk;
  • Constantly seeking feedback to figure out how to improve;
  • Being committed to personal and/or organizational goals and going the extra mile to achieve them;
  • Actively seeking out opportunities and seizing them when they occur;
  • Being able to deal with setbacks and continue to pursue your goals despite obstacles (i.e., resilience).

Further, there are six things you can do to maintain your self-motivation:

  • Continue learning and acquiring knowledge (i.e., develop a love of learning);
  • Spend time with motivated, enthusiastic, and supportive people;
  • Cultivate a positive mindset and build your optimism and resilience;
  • Identify your strengths and weaknesses, and work on them;
  • Avoid procrastination and work on your time management skills;
  • Get help when you need it, and be willing to help others succeed (Skills You Need, n.d.).

14 Strategies for Students to Increase Their Self-Motivation to Study

Students are particularly well-suited to reap the benefits of self-motivation, but it can be hard to be self-motivated in the current educational environment.

Luckily, there are some things you can do as teachers, parents, and adult mentors to help students become self-motivated. In addition, there are plenty of strategies that students can apply themselves.

Here are some ideas for how to encourage self-motivation in students:

  • Provide students with as much autonomy and freedom of choice as possible (e.g., give students a choice in their seating arrangements or a range of options for their final project, and implement problem-based learning);
  • Provide useful feedback, praise hard work, and deliver critical feedback using words like “and” and “what if” instead of “but” to encourage student competence;
  • Cultivate a high-quality relationship with your students by taking a genuine interest in them, acting friendly, staying flexible, keeping your focus on the end goal of learning, and not giving up on them;
  • Encourage your students to think about, write about, and discuss how what they are learning is relevant to their own lives (Ferlazzo, 2015).

And, here are some ways that students can bolster their own self-motivation:

  • Attach meaning to your studies and take personal ownership over your knowledge and learning;
  • Create a plan: Map out your semester, your month, your week, and even your day;
  • Build a routine and apply time management skills to become more organized and productive;
  • Identify several comfortable study environments (they should be quiet and have few distractions);
  • Get enough sleep, eat nutritious food, and exercise regularly to stay healthy;
  • Tame “time monsters” like the internet, video games, or unproductive time spent with friends;
  • Avoid multitasking by choosing one subject or task to work on at a time and focusing all of your attention on it;
  • Take planned—and well-earned—breaks to stay refreshed and motivated;
  • Connect with a support system of friends and family who will encourage you to do your best;
  • Talk positively to yourself (Buckle, 2013).

You may find it much easier to encourage self-motivation in the workplace than in school.

After all, everyone in the workplace is there because they chose to be there, not because they’re required to be there by the law or by their parents. Employees might have vastly disparate reasons for being at work, but it’s unlikely they were compelled to work for their specific organization against their will.

As a manager, there are many ways to foster self-motivation in the workplace, including:

  • Giving your employees one-on-one attention, feedback, and recognition;
  • Ensure your employees have opportunities for meaningful advancement as well as training and education opportunities;
  • Set the example in terms of tone, work ethic, and values . Be a role model for positivity, optimism, and hard work;
  • Cultivate an uplifting and motivating culture that encourages employees to want to do their best;
  • Foster socialization through teamwork and team-based activities, projects, and events;
  • Stay as transparent as possible and open yourself up to questions, concerns, and ideas from your employees. Implement an open-door policy to ensure your employees feel heard (DeMers, 2015).

Writers Nick Nanton and J. W. Dicks at Fast Company offer some further strategies to ensure that both you and your employees stay motivated:

  • Sell your mission statement to your team as you would to an investor. Ensure the people working to meet that mission understand it and buy into it;
  • Foster a culture in which each employee has a specific job and a specific role with the organization, and give them room to grow and opportunities to implement ambitious new ideas;
  • Focus on inspiring your staff instead of just motivating them. Inspired employees will inherently be motivated;
  • Show your team recognition and appreciation for the hard work they do;
  • Share your passion with your team and lead from the front by developing a positive mindset and displaying a positive attitude (2015).

Techniques to Motivate Yourself at Work

You can also take control of your own self-motivation at work. Some good techniques for becoming more self-motivated at work include:

  • Finding work that interests you (This is a vital tip—it’s much easier to be self-motivated when you are passionate about what you do and fully engaged in it.);
  • Request feedback from your boss or colleagues to learn about where you can improve and to enhance role clarity;
  • Learn a new skill that is relevant to your role (or your desired role);
  • Ask for a raise. Financial incentives are generally considered extrinsic motivation, but if you’re happy with your position, being paid what you think you are worth can be very self-motivating;
  • Remind yourself of your “why,” the reason you do the work you do. When you are doing meaningful work, you are more likely to find fulfillment and stay self-motivated;
  • Volunteer your services to others (This is especially helpful if you have trouble defining your “why.”);
  • Take a vacation to allow yourself to rest, recharge, and come back refreshed and ready to work (Stahl, 2016).

The research on self-motivation clarifies its vital role in helping us achieve our goals. Check out the findings on two important and related topics below.

Self-Discipline and Self-Motivation

While self-discipline and self-motivation are two distinct concepts, self-discipline is vital to maintaining self-motivation. It’s not enough simply to be self-motivated—to achieve your goals, you need to couple self-motivation with self-discipline.

A study of online learners showed that even though they might all be considered self-motivated (since they are all taking a voluntary course with the goal of learning), those with self-discipline were the most likely to succeed.

Those who were highly self-disciplined displayed higher competence at the end of the course, fulfilled more external tasks, and were more effective in achieving their goals (Gorbunovs, Kapenieks, & Cakula, 2016).

Self-Motivation and Weight Loss

Very often, self-motivation is a key component of weight loss. Research on the connection between the two is quite clear.

In multiple studies, researchers found that participants who reported greater autonomy support and self-determined motivation were more effective in losing weight, more likely to keep the weight off for longer periods of time, and more positive about their weight loss journey (Teixeira, Silva, Mata, Palmeira, & Markland, 2012).

When we have our own closely held reasons for wanting to lose weight—and these reasons are based on personal fulfillment rather than meeting external standards—we are much more likely to find success.

16 Activities, Exercises, and Worksheets for Self-Motivation (PDFs)

17 Activities, Exercises, and Worksheets for Self-Motivation (PDF)

Check out the activities, exercises, and worksheets below to find ways to enhance your self-motivation. Or, share these resources with your clients to help them get self-motivated.

Quick and Easy Motivation Techniques

Some techniques and exercises are more difficult than others. If you’re looking for a quick and easy exercise or activity to boost your self-motivation, try these:

  • Listen to motivational music, like: a. Bill Conti’s Gonna Fly Now ; b. Paul Engemann’s Push it to the Limit ; c. Queen’s We Will Rock You ; d. Kenny Loggins’ Danger Zone ; e. ACDC’s Thunderstruck .
  • Watch a motivational movie, like: a. Forrest Gump ; b. The Pursuit of Happyness ; c. Life is Beautiful ; d. Rain Man ; e . The Family Man .
  • Read books that boost motivation from authors like: a. Napoleon Hill; b. Brian Tracy; c. Tony Robbins; d. Jim Rohn (Mueller, 2012).

Stronger Motivational Techniques

If you need techniques with a bit more power, you can try these:

  • Set wisely chosen and deeply personal goals that you are excited about working toward;
  • Schedule rewards for yourself when you accomplish your goals (or when you make steps toward your goals, for the larger ones);
  • Visualize yourself achieving and fulfilling these goals;
  • Create a vision board with your goals, aims, and dreams in mind, and post it somewhere you will see it often;
  • Pay attention to your “hierarchy of needs” (à la Abraham Maslow) and ensure you are meeting your lower-level needs (including physiological needs like food and sleep, safety needs, social needs, and esteem needs);
  • Consider using Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), the study linking neurology, language, and programming to understand human experience and motivation;
  • Envision what could happen when you reach your goals, as well as what could happen when you fail to reach your goals;
  • Incorporate things you are interested in and engage your curiosity when setting and working toward your goals;
  • Make a commitment to someone or something to ensure your future self will find it difficult to change plans or put things off (Mueller, 2012).

Self-Motivation Workbook (PDF)

This workbook is an excellent resource for anyone who wants to develop self-motivation.

It contains 23 pages of self-motivation information, activities, and exercises to help you find the drive within yourself that’s needed to achieve your goals.

You’ll find sections like:

  • What Makes People Self-Motivated?;
  • Lack of Energy or Self-Motivation?;
  • Making Decisions;
  • Don’t Make Excuses;
  • Be Clear About Your Decisions;
  • The Three Decisions That Will Shape Your Life;
  • The NAC Concept of Pain and Pleasure;
  • Transforming Yourself.

Please note that you will need to register with www.plr.me to download this workbook. You can find more free motivation tools and worksheets here .

Exercise: Build Self-Efficacy

Building self-efficacy is one of the best ways to develop your self-motivation. It might sound difficult or complex, but there are three simple activities you can do that help get you there:

  • Ensure early success by choosing activities or steps that you know you can do;
  • Watch others succeed in the activity you want to try—this is particularly effective if the person you are observing is similar to you and/or close to you;
  • Find a supportive voice, like a coach, counselor, friendly manager, or mentor to encourage you and give you feedback (Mantell, 2012).

Set SMART Goals

As noted earlier, setting SMART goals is a great way to enhance your self-motivation.

When you set these goals, make sure they are:

  • Measurable;
  • Attainable;

Creating goals for yourself is one of the best things you can do to build a foundation for self-motivation. And if your goals are SMART, you are much more likely to find it easy to motivate yourself.

Getting Motivated to Change

This PDF from Texas Christian University’s Institute of Behavior Research offers many useful handouts and worksheets on motivation, along with some instructions for how to use them and suggestions for implementing change-focused counseling and coaching (Bartholomew, Dansereau, & Simpson, 2006).

It breaks things down into four parts:

  • Motivation 101;
  • The Art of Self-Motivation;
  • Staying Motivated;
  • Making It Second Nature.

All four parts contain great resources, but the Art of Self-Motivation section includes some really useful handouts and worksheets, including:

  • Motivation and Change handout (page 28);
  • Taking a Hard Look – Pros and Cons (page 29);
  • Target Log (page 30).

Some of the resources in this PDF are targeted to people who are recovering from addiction, but it’s easy enough to alter and adapt them for more general use.

Click here to access this 63-page resource.

Meditation can be a great way to help maintain your self-motivation.

Try these meditations to help you stay self-motivated:

  • Mountain Refuge’s Meditation for Self-Motivation ( 20-minute guided meditation from Meditainment);
  • Meditation to Help Stop Procrastination (guided meditation from Jason Stephenson that’s about one half-hour);

  • Guided Meditation—Motivation (11-minute guided meditation from Minds with Integrity);

  • 10 Minute Meditation for Motivation and Building a Positive Mindset (10-minute guided meditation from The Mindful Movement);

  • Guided Meditation—Increase Motivation and Confidence (nine-minute guided meditation from Michael Mackenzie at Project Meditation).

There are several fun quizzes and questionnaires you can use to explore your level of self-motivation. They aren’t all rigorous and validated instruments, but that doesn’t mean they can’t be helpful.

Self-Motivation Quiz From Richard Step

You can find this quick five-minute quiz from Richard Step at this link . It includes 45 questions rated on a three-point scale (with Rarely, Maybe, and A Lot as the three options).

You can take it with a focus on your life in general, or you can narrow your focus to one of several areas, including:

  • Academics and schoolwork;
  • Business ownership;
  • Career growth and change;
  • Creativity;
  • Entrepreneurship and self-employment;
  • Faith and spirituality;
  • Family life;
  • Fitness and health;
  • Friendships;
  • Future vision;
  • Goal setting and completion;
  • Helping other people;
  • Hobbies and casual interests;
  • “I was asked to take the test”;
  • Just for fun or curiosity;
  • Leadership and management;
  • Life purpose and passions;
  • Marriage and relationships
  • Money and wealth;
  • Psychological research;
  • Retirement and legacy living
  • Self-discovery and development;
  • Shopping and spending;
  • Teaching and training others;
  • Teamwork and team-building;
  • Trauma recovery.

Your results from this quiz will help you determine what makes you tick and what your main motivators are.

Motivation Style Quiz

If you want to learn what type of incentives you are most responsive to, this quiz from Martha Beck at Oprah.com can help. It includes only 10 questions with five response options each, so it’s a quick and easy way to discover your motivation style.

Your results will be presented via a score on the five different motivator types:

  • Connection;
  • Accomplishment;
  • Enlightenment;

Scores can range from 1 to 10, with higher scores indicating that something is a greater motivator for you. Anything with a score of 6 or higher can be considered one of your major motivators, while anything below 3 is only minimally important. Your main motivational style is the component with the highest score.

Along with your scores, you will see descriptions of each motivation style to get an idea of what your “type” is like.

The Self-Motivation Inventory

For a slightly more research-backed scale of self-motivation, you might want to consider the Self-Motivation Inventory. This inventory will help you determine your level of self-motivation and whether you’re driven more by internal or external motivators.

It includes 30 items rated on a scale from 1 (less true) to 5 (more true), dependent on how well you feel each item describes you.

A few sample items include:

  • I frequently think about how good I will feel when I accomplish what I have set out to do;
  • If asked about what motivates me to succeed, I would say that the number one factor is a sense of personal fulfillment, that I gave my all and did my best;
  • When I think about the reward for doing something, the first thing I think about is the sense of accomplishment or achievement;
  • On several occasions, I have given myself a consequence for making a poor or less optimal decision. For instance, if I chose to eat an extra helping of dessert, I tell myself to work out an extra 10 minutes at the gym;
  • Even if something makes me feel slightly nervous or uncomfortable, I typically do not have much trouble getting myself to do it.

When you have answered all 30 questions, total your responses for your overall score. Your score will place you within one of the following categories:

  • Total Score 113-150: highly self-motivated;
  • Total Score 75-112: somewhat self-motivated;
  • Total Score 38-74: slightly self-motivated (perhaps in one or two areas, but not overall);
  • Total Score 0-37: not at all self-motivated (more externally motivated).

This inventory was developed by Milana Leshinsky and Larina Kase, and you can find it at this link .

If you’ve committed to becoming more self-motivated and working toward your goals, these seven smartphone apps can help you get started and maintain your drive:

  • DayOneApp : This journaling app allows you to add pictures, local weather data, and geo-location to each journal entry (iOS and Android);
  • MyFitnessPal : This food- and exercise-focused app helps determine the calories and overall nutrition of the food you eat and records your exercise activity (iOS and Android);
  • Headout : This app shares exciting, last-minute deals on fun experiences, including nearby activities, events, and tours. Make sure you make time to rest and relax in addition to all the work (iOS and Android);
  • Coach.me : This app acts as a sort of digital coach by posing powerful questions that will help you narrow down your desires, set goals, and stay open-minded and on track (iOS and Android) (Boss, 2016).

If you’re a fan of podcasts, you might be happy to know that there are plenty of motivation-related podcasts available.

Here’s just a sample of the podcasts out there focused on this topic:

  • The Daily Boost: Best Daily Motivation ( website );
  • The Accidental Creative ( website );
  • Inspire Nation—Daily Inspiration, Motivation, Meditation ( website );
  • The School of Greatness with Lewis Howes ( website );
  • Cortex ( website );
  • The Tony Robbins Podcast ( website );
  • Happier with Gretchen Rubin ( website );
  • Beyond the To Do List—Personal Productivity Perspectives ( website );
  • The Charlene Show ( website );
  • The Ziglar Show—Inspiring Your True Performance ( website );
  • Courageous Self-Confidence ( website ).

Check out other great podcasts that are focused on improving your motivation at https://player.fm/ .

Sometimes you just need a quick boost to get self-motivated, and quotes are a great way to get the spike in motivation that you need. Among this list are 17 quotes collected by Lydia Sweatt (2016). Give these quotes and messages a read next time you’re lacking in motivation.

“The only time you fail is when you fall down and stay down.”
“Most people can motivate themselves to do things simply by knowing that those things need to be done. But not me. For me, motivation is this horrible, scary game where I try to make myself do something while I actively avoid doing it. If I win, I have to do something I don’t want to do. And if I lose, I’m one step closer to ruining my entire life. And I never know whether I’m going to win or lose until the last second.”

Allie Brosh

“Always choose the future over the past. What do we do now?”

Brian Tracy

“You are your master. Only you have the master keys to open the inner locks.”
“Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy.”

Norman Vincent Peale

“If you can dream it, you can do it.”

Walt Disney

“Where there is a will, there is a way. If there is a chance in a million that you can do something, anything to keep what you want from ending, do it. Pry the door open or, if need be, wedge your foot in that door and keep it open.”

Pauline Kael

“Do not wait; the time will never be ‘just right.’ Start where you stand, and work with whatever tools you may have at your command, and better tools will be found as you go along.”

George Herbert

“Press forward. Do not stop, do not linger in your journey, but strive for the mark set before you.”

George Whitefield

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”

Eleanor Roosevelt

“Aim for the moon. If you miss, you may hit a star.”

W. Clement Stone

“Don’t watch the clock; do what it does. Keep going.”

Sam Levenson

“There will be obstacles. There will be doubters. There will be mistakes. But with hard work, there are no limits.”

Michael Phelps

“Keep your eyes on the stars, and your feet on the ground.”

Theodore Roosevelt

“We aim above the mark to hit the mark.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

“One way to keep momentum going is to have constantly greater goals.”

Michael Korda

“Change your life today. Don’t gamble on the future, act now, without delay.”

Simone de Beauvoir

“You just can’t beat the person who never gives up.”
“Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.”

Arthur Ashe

“Why should you continue going after your dreams? Because seeing the look on the faces of the people who said you couldn’t . . . will be priceless.”
“Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.”

Harriet Beecher Stow

Similarly, sometimes a motivational poster, meme, or image can work wonders for your self-motivation. Below are six of my favorite motivation-related images. (Images that are not Creative Commons can be accessed via the links.)

6 Images to Inspire Self-Motivation

The Classic Road Sign

I don’t know about you, but there’s something that calls to me in this image: the blue sky and clouds, the angle encouraging us to look up, and “Motivation” in big letters. For some reason, it just works!

Looking at this image makes me think about life as a journey and motivation as an important piece of that journey. If we want to reach our next destination, we need to put forth some effort to make it happen. And when we do, seeing that big road sign welcoming us can often be reward enough.

The Yes I Can image also points out that the best motivation is self-motivation; as we’ve learned in this piece, that is truly the case. When we are motivated for our own internal reasons and committed to reach our goals for personal fulfillment rather than meeting the standards of others, we are more likely to succeed.

Sometimes, all we need is a quick reminder that “Yes I can!” Keep this image handy, especially when you’re working towards a particularly challenging goal, and it might give you the boost of motivation you need to stay on track.

I Cannot Change Yesterday, But I Can Change Today

The message of this image  is such an important point to remember, especially for those of us who struggle with leaving the past where it belongs: in the past.

It can be all too easy to dwell on past experiences, mistakes you’ve made, and roads that you should have taken. However, that does nothing to improve your current state. It’s good to reflect on what has brought you to where you are today, but letting worry, shame, embarrassment, and self-doubt based on your past creep into your present is a sure recipe for failure.

Remember that yesterday is done and gone—you can’t change it, so there’s no point dwelling on it. Take your lessons learned and apply them to something you can change: today.

What Matters Most Is How You See Yourself

This is another classic image in self-motivation and self-esteem, probably because it has a kitten in it. Kittens make for popular images.

Besides being cute, it also gets an important point across: The most important thing is the view you have of yourself. What other people think simply doesn’t matter most of the time. It’s what you think and feel about yourself that drives your behavior.

If you want to stay motivated and achieve your long-term goals, make sure to work on your sense of self-esteem and self-efficacy. See the best in yourself when you look in the mirror, and you’ll ensure that the best in yourself is what you manifest through your actions.

(Im)possible

This exhilarating (and potentially anxiety-inducing) image reminds us that what seems impossible is sometimes very possible. Of course, some things are truly impossible, based on things like gravity and the laws of nature, but this image isn’t about those things. It’s about things that seem impossible until you actually try them.

Challenge yourself to try something that seems impossible, giving it at least one solid attempt. You may be surprised at the outcome.

Don’t Worry, You Got This

This meme is both adorable and motivational. Featuring a tiny hedgehog in a victorious pose, this is a great image to go to when you’re in need of self-motivation combined with light-heartedness and humor. It can sometimes give a boost that simply can’t be found in more solemn inspirational quotes.

Looking at the cute little hedgehog and telling yourself, “ You got this! ” might be enough to get yourself in the frame of mind to take on a new challenge with enthusiasm and a smile.

If you’re a cinephile, you might find movies a good source of motivation.

If so, this list of 15 motivational movies (along with the movies listed above) might be enough to give you a boost:

  • To Kill a Mockingbird (1962);
  • The Shawshank Redemption (1994);
  • Queen of Katwe (2016);
  • Apollo 13 (1995);
  • The Queen (2006);
  • Lion (2016);
  • Southpaw (2015);
  • The African Queen (1951);
  • Dangal (2016);
  • Field of Dreams (1989);
  • My Life as a Zucchini (2016);
  • The Finest Hours (2016);
  • Begin Again (2013);
  • Sing Street (2016).

To see descriptions of the motivational power of these movies, read Samuel R. Murrian’s (2017) article  here .

Don’t have time for a full-length feature film? That’s okay! There are also tons of great TED Talks and YouTube videos on self-motivation. Check out any of the videos listed below to learn more about self-motivation:

The Psychology of Self-Motivation – Scott Geller

Psychology Professor Scott Gellar (mentioned earlier in this article) explains how to become more self-motivated in this inspiring TEDx Talk.

How Can We Become More Self-Motivated – Kyra G.

Thirteen-year-old Kyra shares in this TEDxYOUTH talk how to be motivated by setting goals and looking up to positive role models.

Self Motivation – Brendan Clark

Another young TEDxYOUTH speaker, Brendan Clark shares his own philosophies on motivation and success in this video.

Of course, there’s always the old-fashioned option to learn more about self-motivation: reading.

Check out these excellent books on self-motivation if you want an in-depth look at the topic:

  • Why We Do What We Do: Understanding Self-Motivation by Edward L. Deci and Richard Flaste ( Amazon );
  • The Self-Motivation Handbook by Jim Cathcart ( Amazon );
  • Self-Theories: Their Role in Motivation, Personality, and Development by Carol Dweck ( Amazon );
  • The Motivation Manifesto by Brendon Burchard ( Amazon );
  • The Motivation Myth: How High Achievers Really Set Themselves Up to Win by Jeff Haden ( Amazon );
  • No Excuses! The Power of Self-Discipline by Brian Tracy ( Amazon );
  • The Self-Driven Child: The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control Over Their Lives by William Stixrud and Ned Johnson ( Amazon ).

my personal motivation essay

17 Tools To Increase Motivation and Goal Achievement

These 17 Motivation & Goal Achievement Exercises [PDF] contain all you need to help others set meaningful goals, increase self-drive, and experience greater accomplishment and life satisfaction.

Created by Experts. 100% Science-based.

In this piece, we covered what self-motivation is, how it fits into similar concepts in psychology, how you can boost it in yourself, and how you can encourage it in others.

It’s possible to increase self-motivation, and in turn, to increase your productivity and success. Hopefully, this article gave you some techniques and tools for achieving this.

What’s your take on self-motivation? What works best for you? Do you find yourself motivated more by external rewards or by internal drives? Did you find that your motivation differs in different areas of life? Let us know your thoughts in the comments.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Goal Achievement Exercises for free .

  • Bandura, A., & Schunk, D. H. (1981). Cultivating competence, self-efficacy, and intrinsic interest through proximal self-motivation. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 41 , 586-598.
  • Bartholomew, N. G., Dansereau, D. F., & Simpson, D. D. (2006). Getting motivated to change. TCU Institute of Behavioral Research. Retrieved from http://ibr.tcu.edu/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/TMA06Sept-mot.pdf
  • Boss, J. (2016). 7 apps to help integrate tech with self-improvement goals. Entrepreneur. Retrieved from https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/254636
  • Buckle, K. (2013). 10 tips for self-motivation for students. Gratia Plena. Retrieved from https://gratiaplenacounseling.org/10-tips-for-self-motivation-for-students/
  • DeMers, J. (2015). 6 motivation secrets to inspire your employees. Inc. Retrieved from https://www.inc.com/jayson-demers/6-motivation-secrets-to-inspire-your-employees.html
  • Ferlazzo, L. (2015). Strategies for helping students motivate themselves. Edutopia. Retrieved from https://www.edutopia.org/blog/strategies-helping-students-motivate-themselves-larry-ferlazzo
  • Geller, E. S. (2016). The psychology of self-motivation. In E. S. Geller (Ed.) Applied Psychology (pp. 83-118). New York, NY, US: Cambridge University Press.
  • Gorbunovs, A., Kapenieks, A., & Cakula, S. (2016). Self-discipline as a key indicator to improve learning outcomes in e-learning environment. Procedia – Social and Behavioral Sciences, 231 , 245-262. Mantell, M. (2012). Four strategies that build lasting motivation (and how to use them to achieve your goals). LifeHacker. Retrieved from https://lifehacker.com/5958782/four-strategies-that-build-lasting-motivation-and-how-to-use-them-to-achieve-your-goals
  • Mueller, S. (2012). Self-motivation techniques: Proven motivation tactics to boost your motivation. Planet of Success. Retrieved from http://www.planetofsuccess.com/motivationtechniques/
  • Murrian, S. R. (2017). 15 inspiring, uplifting movies you can watch right now on Netflix for a hopeful new year. Parade. Retrieved from https://parade.com/632586/samuelmurrian/15-inspiring-uplifting-movies-you-can-watch-right-now-on-netflix-for-a-hopeful-new-year/
  • Nanton, N., & Dicks, J. W. (2015). 5 steps to keeping your employees—and yourself—motivated daily. Fast Company. Retrieved from https://www.fastcompany.com/3041620/5-steps-to-keeping-your-employees-and-yourself-motivated-daily
  • Skills You Need. (n.d.). Self-motivation. Skills You Need: Personal Skills. Retrieved from https://www.skillsyouneed.com/ps/self-motivation.html
  • Stahl, A. (2016). Seven ways to get motivated at work. Forbes: Leadership. Retrieved from https://www.forbes.com/sites/ashleystahl/2016/11/22/seven-ways-to-get-motivated-at-work/#414d52633cd5
  • Sweatt, L. (2016). 17 motivational quotes to help you achieve your dreams. Success. Retrieved from https://www.success.com/article/17-motivational-quotes-to-help-you-achieve-your-dreams
  • Texeira, P. J., Silva, M. N., Mata, J., Palmeira, A. L., & Markland, D. (2012). International Journal of Behavioral Nutrition and Physical Activity, 9, 22.

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Thank you for the abundance of information.

https://kaunselorfahimah.com/

This article very helpful for me. For me, intrinsic motivation work for me. Thank you so much to the writer.

Moly Salindran

Wow.. wonderful article. Covered all corners .. its so inspirational and insightful.

reyhan

thanks alot of information

Christine Cunningham

Excellent resource and information for all areas of life. I look forward to reading some of the books your listed.

JP

SIMPLY PHENOMENAL ARTICLE.

Sanjay Prajapati

Thank you so much for this wonderful post. Really great

Erepamo Eradiri

This is the one of best example “A man who goes to work every only as a means to pay the bills, keep his family off his back, and please his boss is not self-motivated, while a man who needs no external forces to make the trek into work every day and finds fulfillment in what he does is self-motivated;” Thanks for sharing this helpful post in fast-changing life!

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my personal motivation essay

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Importance of Motivation: Driving Success and Personal Growth Essay Writing

Motivation serves as a powerful force that propels individuals towards achieving their goals and aspirations. It is the inner drive that energizes and directs behavior, pushing individuals to persist, overcome challenges, and strive for excellence.

Importance of Motivation

Importance of Motivation

Motivation plays a crucial role in personal development and self improvement. Lets explore the significance of motivation in various aspects of life, including personal growth, academic achievement, career success, and overall well-being.

Importance of Motivation for Personal Growth

Motivation fuels individuals to step out of their comfort zones, embrace new experiences, and continually challenge themselves. With motivation as the driving force, individuals can set meaningful goals, acquire new skills, and cultivate positive habits. It enables personal development by fostering a growth mindset, resilience, and a willingness to learn from setbacks.

Importance of Motivation in Academic Achievement

Motivation is vital for academic success. It provides students with the desire and determination to excel in their studies, engage in learning, and achieve academic goals. Motivated students exhibit higher levels of effort, persistence, and dedication, leading to improved performance and a deeper understanding of the subject matter. Additionally, motivation helps students overcome obstacles, maintain focus, and take advantage of opportunities for intellectual growth.

Importance of Motivation in Career Success

Motivation is a key driver of career success. It fuels ambition, determination, and a strong work ethic. Motivated individuals set clear career goals, strive for continuous improvement, and take initiative to seize opportunities. They exhibit enthusiasm and passion for their work, leading to higher levels of productivity, innovation, and job satisfaction. Motivation also enables individuals to navigate challenges, persevere during setbacks, and adapt to changing circumstances in the workplace.

Importance of Motivation for Goal Achievement

Motivation is essential for achieving desired goals, whether it is personal or professional. It provides individuals with the necessary drive and commitment to overcome obstacles, stay focused, and make consistent progress towards their objectives. Motivated individuals are more likely to develop effective goal-setting strategies, create action plans, and maintain the necessary discipline and perseverance to see their goals through to completion.

Importance of Motivation for Well-being and Happiness

Motivation contributes significantly to overall well-being and happiness . When individuals are motivated, they experience a sense of purpose, fulfillment, and satisfaction in their lives. Motivation provides a positive outlook, increases self-confidence, and enhances one’s sense of accomplishment. It also fosters a sense of autonomy and control, allowing individuals to make choices aligned with their values and passions, leading to a more fulfilling and meaningful life.

Motivation serves as a driving force in achieving personal growth, academic success, career advancement, and overall well-being. It fuels individuals to set goals, take action, and persist in the face of challenges. By cultivating motivation, individuals can unlock their full potential, overcome obstacles, and pursue excellence in various aspects of life. Recognizing the importance of motivation and actively nurturing it can lead to greater fulfillment, success, and a more vibrant and purposeful existence.

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How to Get Motivated to Write an Essay: 9 Easy Steps

Writing essays is an essential part of school and college life, but most people dread writing them.

Especially if you’re not a prolific writer, it can be hard to structure them, to put pen to paper, and to get them done efficiently.

Staying focused on homework can be hard enough!

In this guide, I’m giving you my best tips for how to get motivated to write an essay, which assumes that you currently don’t have the motivation now.

Follow these steps to set up each of your essays, and then conquer them one by one.

You’ll find that once you do, you feel more accomplished, more able to stick to a plan, and much more able to stay focused on homework!

writing-essay-on-typewriter

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my personal motivation essay

1. Choose an Enjoyable Topic, if Possible

If you’re going to be motivated to write an essay, the easiest way to do so is by choosing a topic that means something to you.

Sure, some essays already have the topic handed out and in that case, you don’t have much of a choice, but many times you do.

You’ll be confined to a specific area, probably – whether it’s choosing an influential person in history, a book written by a woman, etc.

But within the bounds of what you can choose, make sure to choose something that is meaningful to you and gets you at least somewhat excited to research and explore the topic.

This helps you to feel like you’re motivated to write an essay because you genuinely want to learn more rather than being forced to.

2. Outline the Essay including the Introduction and Conclusion

In this step, you’re going to set up the essay to make it as easy as possible to think about.

This is one of my biggest tips when it comes to sticking to a plan .

This helps get you motivated to write the essay because it makes it seem less daunting.

Most essays have an introduction, a body, and a conclusion.

You need to work out how many body paragraphs you will need based on the points you are going to make in the essay.

Write this outline down to help you with the next step and to see that you can approach the essay by these individual sections rather than feeling like you need to sit down and just write an essay all at once.

writing-essay-on-notebook-paper

3. Chunk the Word Count Down

Once you have your outline down, it’s time to figure out how many words should go in each section.

For instance, if I were doing a 1000 word essay, I would probably do 100 for an introduction, 200 for 4 body paragraphs each and 100 for a conclusion.

However you break it down is up to you and how many words you want the final essay to be.

This seems like extra work up front, but writing an essay that is properly outlined and has word counts attached to it can give you motivation because you see that it is already starting to come together before you even start writing. Suddenly, it seems a lot easier and that’s what encourages us to forge ahead.

4. Break Down the Work Over Multiple Days

As long as you’re not someone who has waited until the last day to write your essay (and if you have then this is not for you), break down the work over multiple days and plan it out so it’s not all on one day.

For instance, if you had 5 days and 5 sections, you could do a section a day, or if you only have 2 days, you could split it up in half.

Use a tool like Click Up or Trello, found in my productivity tools list , to help you plan.

This means you don’t have to work up the motivation to write your essay all at once, but only have to work up the motivation to write a certain number of words, which some people find easier.

5. Organize Your Research and Notes

Figure out where your lack of motivation to write your essay is coming from.

Chances are, the whole thing seems overwhelming and that’s one of the reasons you don’t start.

I always like to organize my research into easy-to-read notes, and many times I’ve used index cards to write down each fact and then you can arrange the index cards into the structure you want your essay to take later on.

You have to first digest the material you have researched in order to put it into an essay, so make sure to do this crucial step in between researching and writing, otherwise you’ll be left with a pile of books with no notes and trying to write the essay from memory of exactly what the quote was about photosynthesis on page 66 on the book with the blue cover.

I know that these steps feel like they’re adding more stress to your essay writing experience, I promise that once you do them you will feel so much more motivated to get it done.

typewriter-to-write-an-essay

6. Look Up Quotes

Especially if you’re writing for a high school paper, a lot of times it can be a good idea to start with a quote in your introduction.

Regardless, looking for quotes surrounding your topic is a great idea to give yourself some inspiration to write an essay and give you the motivation to start.

Remember that the quote doesn’t always have to exactly be about your topic or have the exact wording of your topic, but maybe it’s from an important person that you’re writing about in your essay or they’re talking about a general concept that you’re including in your essay.

We’ve got some great options to get you started in these quotes on staying focused and these quotes on never giving up .

7. Read Related Essays or Past Essays

It’s unlikely this is your first essay, in which case you should read over your past essays to remind yourself how you structured them and look at examples of when you finished essays, including any feedback that teachers gave you.

You can also read related essays on the subject that you look up online or the teacher hands out from past students, but you need to be very careful to only read this and not make any notes that could lead to you plagiarizing, even on accident.

It may be an idea to read essays in an unrelated topic, just so you can get more ideas for structuring an essay but won’t be in danger of stealing someone else’s words or ideas.

8. Plan Writing Sessions with a Friend

If it’s truly the motivation to write the essay that you struggle with and not the difficulty, team up with a friend and plan writing sessions where you set goals for how far along in your essays you want to be by the end of it.

You shouldn’t share notes to the point that you end up with the same essay, but working across from someone who is also working on the essay can be a huge motivator so you don’t feel left behind.

This also works more broadly if you decide to work in the library where other people are also working on various assignments, as the atmosphere of productivity can be one of the things that encourages you to improve your own productivity even further.

books-on-writing-essays

9. Choose a Reward for When You Finish

If getting a good grade on the essay isn’t a good enough motivator, choose a reward for yourself for when you finish the essay to help keep you motivated to study .

It could be a cake that you bake yourself, it could be a friend that you hang out with, it could be a weekend trip you plan.

It could be something small like a television show you watch or, if the essay is part of a longer string of assignments, taking an hour break afterwards.

Whatever it is, push yourself through writing the essay in order to get to the reward at the end.

How to Get Motivated to Write an Essay: 9 Easy Steps via @allamericanatlas

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What Students Are Saying About What Motivates Them to Learn

Teenagers share what drives them in school: inspiring teachers, interesting classes, the feeling of accomplishment and more.

my personal motivation essay

By The Learning Network

This week we asked students, “ What motivates you to learn? ” The question was inspired by an Opinion essay by Jonathan Malesic called “ The Key to Success in College Is So Simple, It’s Almost Never Mentioned .”

That key, says Mr. Malesic, who teaches writing at the University of Texas at Dallas, is “a simple willingness to learn.” He writes, “In more than 20 years of college teaching, I have seen that students who are open to new knowledge will learn. Students who aren’t won’t.”

We wanted to know what it was that got students to open up to new knowledge. They said great teachers, interactive classes, setting their own goals and having a genuine interest in a subject were all highly motivating. But many admitted that grades and getting into the colleges and careers of their choice were their main drivers, and they criticized the school system for being so “destination-focused” and quashing their curiosity with endless standardized tests. Read more about their motives below.

Thank you to all those who joined the conversation on our writing prompts this week, including students from Glenwood Springs High School in Glenwood Springs, Colo. ; Holicong Middle School in Buckingham, Pa. ; and Patrick Henry High School in Ashland, Va.

Please note: Student comments have been lightly edited for length, but otherwise appear as they were originally submitted.

Teachers who inspire a love of learning

For me, knowingness was like a lock; someone had to give me the key. I used to be the type of person who never wanted to ask questions for fear of not looking like the “smart girl” I was supposed to be. With that came many personal struggles with school work and a lack of understanding. It wasn’t until a teacher gave me the key that I was able to become more successful and enjoy learning. This teacher, who I now greatly look up to, told me that just because you ask a question doesn’t mean you are stupid, it’s actually quite the opposite.

— Laynie, Cambridge-Isanti High School, Minnesota

When I think back on my schooling and when I was most engaged, it was when I was with a teacher that genuinely enjoyed the material they were teaching. Even my history class this year is much more exciting and engaging because I can tell that my teacher enjoys it and he makes it enjoyable by adding in elements that relate to the modern day so we can better understand it.

— Isabella, Atrisco Heritage Academy High School

The motivation I have to learn presents itself when I am taught with passion. A recent example portraying this idea was just a few nights ago when I was studying for a math test. Before my scheduled tutoring call, I began to prepare by looking over notes and attempting to solve new problems. I felt no joy in this, just the repetition, problem after problem. When I entered the zoom meeting, my tutor, Will, began to review and explain the concepts to me in a completely different manner, resulting in motivation. I suddenly perked up, becoming excited when I solved a problem, or even if I got one wrong. Will also noticed the sudden change in my character and asked me why I was so exhilarated. My only answer was that I was having fun and I was motivated to learn.

— Adalena, The Potomac School

A genuine interest and curiosity in a subject

From my own personal experience I had discovered the “willingness to learn” through playing instruments. In elementary through middle school I had been forced to play piano, but never really had a passion for it. I didn’t strive to be better, but rather did it to satisfy my parents. That was until I heard my school’s rock band, where I saw the guitarist and decided that I wanted to learn guitar. When learning guitar I got better at it faster than I ever did while playing piano.

— Gavin, Fountain Valley High School

I was most excited during our astronomy unit in 8th grade. I really enjoyed learning about all things space: including the star types, how planets were formed and how the universe was formed. I really felt engaged during class and would find myself somewhat looking forward to every day.

— Jonah, Holicong MS

I have been most engaged in class when we are discussing or even debating a controversial topic that I am highly interested in like climate change. Being able to contribute different ideas and facts to the conversation excited me … I somewhat agree with “school should cultivate students’ curiosity and let them feel the thrill of finding something out” but I think that the educational system has lost sight of that goal. Everything now is about standardized testing, our intelligence being defined by a number.

— Alyanna, Valley Stream North High School

Also, schools often don’t offer classes that students are interested in taking; if students had more classes focused on their passions and interests instead of having the same common core classes for all grade levels, then class averages would go up because students will be more interested in learning their topics and be more willing to study and participate in class discussions.

— Krystle, Cary High School

Hands-on, interactive activities

I am the most engaged in work when 2 specific things are assigned: group work and partner work. I believe project work lets me creatively express what I have learned; whether it be an essay, poster, etc. Partner work lets me have a friend to engage in learning with and share ideas with, and is much more fun than leaving your ideas in your head.

— Dylan, Central Bucks School District

As a student, I believe that students should be able to find things out for themselves. As a teenager I can relate to being annoyed by a teacher whose only way of teaching is long verbal lessons … I believe the occasional interactive or hands on activity that makes students figure things out for themselves is beneficial: Activities like, reading articles, watching videos, and working with a partner could all be ways to enhance the learning experience.

— Collin, Holicong MS

I am most engaged when there is emotion and relation to my current life during the lesson. Listening to a power point with a teacher speaking in a monotone voice with a boring subject puts me to sleep. I need something interesting … something fun.

— Ella, Holicong

Grades and the feeling of accomplishment

My personal motives towards my learning are not complicated, I simply strive for the best grades because of the pride it fills me with. When I get an assignment I put in my best effort, because I know the outcome of a good grade will be the most satisfying feeling.

— Sofia, Glenwood Springs High School, CO

I used to think what motivated me to get good grades and learn in school was so that eventually all the time and effort of working hard would pay off later in the future … That isn’t not true for me, but when I look at it with a bigger lens I think what motivates me in the end run, is being able to achieve greatness and success that will reinforce my self worth … I believe that’s what motivates me, being able to say “I did that,” with the full confidence of knowing I worked hard to do it, and that people around me know that too.

— Haiyan, Glen Ellyn IL

Preparing for the future

As much as I want to say that “a simple willingness to learn” is what propels me to do well in school, it’s not. While it might’ve been when I was younger, schools nowadays are so destination focused that I can’t help but be swept away into raging rapids of grades, colleges, and careers. I’m motivated to do well not because I truly want to learn the material, but because I have to do well in order to get where I want to be later in life … It makes me worry where my motivation will come from if I do get into college.

— Josh, Harvard Westlake

I agree with Mr. Malesic saying that “the willingness to learn” is usually the key to success for students, but I cannot say this would apply to my academic career. Being fully engaged in a class I do not like being in is difficult for me, especially if I won’t be using the information throughout my life. To stay motivated in my classes, I think about my athletic career and dreams of being a college athlete, dreams I’ve had since I was little.

— Daniel, Franklin Square

Being taught a mind-numbingly boring topic is practically inevitable in high school. There’s no avoiding it, but I recognize that I have many goals for my future, including being accepted into medical school to receive a doctorate degree. Emphasizing and developing these goals helps me to prioritize my work, and to put my best effort into everything that I do.

— Ansleigh, Patrick Henry High School, Ashland

Expanding my world

Motivation in learning can differentiate for many different types of people. But for me, my motivation is not only attempting to set structure and demonstrate good grades, but further extending my knowledge and becoming a smarter and better human. Beyond that, learning is not only grades and striving for A’s. It’s an experience, a world that opens doors and unlocks keys that lead to new discoveries.

— Jack, Glenbard West High School

Every day I go to school because I must. I listen and participate because if I don’t, I will fail and will have no way to support myself or a family when I’m older. I have completely lost what it means to learn and how exciting it is. I feel this is mostly the school system’s fault, though some of it is probably mine. We are endlessly told we need to pay attention so we can pass the test and the class, not because knowing this information will help us later on in life (which, let’s be honest, most of it won’t). That’s why I really liked what Mr. Malesic said about Calculus: he hasn’t solved a single problem in years, but learning it expanded his mind and challenged him. Reading this invigorated me to challenge myself in my schooling from now on.

— Emma, Fountain Valley High School

A simple willingness to learn

When I enrolled in computer science, not only did I get distracted easily but I couldn’t pay any attention to the teacher. Eventually when we were doing tasks and homework, I would not understand. I then chose to reverse the unwillingness to learn and decided to give the subject my best try and experiment with it as well. After my decision was made, many things went well for me in learning and understanding the subject when I went to class. My grades went up, my attendance increased, computer science went on my list of favorite subjects to learn, and I became good at the subject. All because I decided to change the way I wanted things to go.

— Jonathan, Glenwood Springs High School

I personally think everyone should have a desire to learn. It doesn’t necessarily have to be school related, it could be something like changing a tire, building a fence, etc. Learning new things has many benefits: Reading books and doing puzzles keeps your mind sharp and learning new hobbies keeps you active and moving.

— Cole, Ellisville

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A woman’s life is all work and little rest. An age gap relationship can help.

my personal motivation essay

In the summer, in the south of France, my husband and I like to play, rather badly, the lottery. We take long, scorching walks to the village — gratuitous beauty, gratuitous heat — kicking up dust and languid debates over how we’d spend such an influx. I purchase scratch-offs, jackpot tickets, scraping the former with euro coins in restaurants too fine for that. I never cash them in, nor do I check the winning numbers. For I already won something like the lotto, with its gifts and its curses, when he married me.

He is ten years older than I am. I chose him on purpose, not by chance. As far as life decisions go, on balance, I recommend it.

When I was 20 and a junior at Harvard College, a series of great ironies began to mock me. I could study all I wanted, prove myself as exceptional as I liked, and still my fiercest advantage remained so universal it deflated my other plans. My youth. The newness of my face and body. Compellingly effortless; cruelly fleeting. I shared it with the average, idle young woman shrugging down the street. The thought, when it descended on me, jolted my perspective, the way a falling leaf can make you look up: I could diligently craft an ideal existence, over years and years of sleepless nights and industry. Or I could just marry it early.

So naturally I began to lug a heavy suitcase of books each Saturday to the Harvard Business School to work on my Nabokov paper. In one cavernous, well-appointed room sat approximately 50 of the planet’s most suitable bachelors. I had high breasts, most of my eggs, plausible deniability when it came to purity, a flush ponytail, a pep in my step that had yet to run out. Apologies to Progress, but older men still desired those things.

I could not understand why my female classmates did not join me, given their intelligence. Each time I reconsidered the project, it struck me as more reasonable. Why ignore our youth when it amounted to a superpower? Why assume the burdens of womanhood, its too-quick-to-vanish upper hand, but not its brief benefits at least? Perhaps it came easier to avoid the topic wholesale than to accept that women really do have a tragically short window of power, and reason enough to take advantage of that fact while they can. As for me, I liked history, Victorian novels, knew of imminent female pitfalls from all the books I’d read: vampiric boyfriends; labor, at the office and in the hospital, expected simultaneously; a decline in status as we aged, like a looming eclipse. I’d have disliked being called calculating, but I had, like all women, a calculator in my head. I thought it silly to ignore its answers when they pointed to an unfairness for which we really ought to have been preparing.

I was competitive by nature, an English-literature student with all the corresponding major ambitions and minor prospects (Great American novel; email job). A little Bovarist , frantic for new places and ideas; to travel here, to travel there, to be in the room where things happened. I resented the callow boys in my class, who lusted after a particular, socially sanctioned type on campus: thin and sexless, emotionally detached and socially connected, the opposite of me. Restless one Saturday night, I slipped on a red dress and snuck into a graduate-school event, coiling an HDMI cord around my wrist as proof of some technical duty. I danced. I drank for free, until one of the organizers asked me to leave. I called and climbed into an Uber. Then I promptly climbed out of it. For there he was, emerging from the revolving doors. Brown eyes, curved lips, immaculate jacket. I went to him, asked him for a cigarette. A date, days later. A second one, where I discovered he was a person, potentially my favorite kind: funny, clear-eyed, brilliant, on intimate terms with the universe.

I used to love men like men love women — that is, not very well, and with a hunger driven only by my own inadequacies. Not him. In those early days, I spoke fondly of my family, stocked the fridge with his favorite pasta, folded his clothes more neatly than I ever have since. I wrote his mother a thank-you note for hosting me in his native France, something befitting a daughter-in-law. It worked; I meant it. After graduation and my fellowship at Oxford, I stayed in Europe for his career and married him at 23.

Of course I just fell in love. Romances have a setting; I had only intervened to place myself well. Mainly, I spotted the precise trouble of being a woman ahead of time, tried to surf it instead of letting it drown me on principle. I had grown bored of discussions of fair and unfair, equal or unequal , and preferred instead to consider a thing called ease.

The reception of a particular age-gap relationship depends on its obviousness. The greater and more visible the difference in years and status between a man and a woman, the more it strikes others as transactional. Transactional thinking in relationships is both as American as it gets and the least kosher subject in the American romantic lexicon. When a 50-year-old man and a 25-year-old woman walk down the street, the questions form themselves inside of you; they make you feel cynical and obscene: How good of a deal is that? Which party is getting the better one? Would I take it? He is older. Income rises with age, so we assume he has money, at least relative to her; at minimum, more connections and experience. She has supple skin. Energy. Sex. Maybe she gets a Birkin. Maybe he gets a baby long after his prime. The sight of their entwined hands throws a lucid light on the calculations each of us makes, in love, to varying degrees of denial. You could get married in the most romantic place in the world, like I did, and you would still have to sign a contract.

Twenty and 30 is not like 30 and 40; some freshness to my features back then, some clumsiness in my bearing, warped our decade, in the eyes of others, to an uncrossable gulf. Perhaps this explains the anger we felt directed at us at the start of our relationship. People seemed to take us very, very personally. I recall a hellish car ride with a friend of his who began to castigate me in the backseat, in tones so low that only I could hear him. He told me, You wanted a rich boyfriend. You chased and snuck into parties . He spared me the insult of gold digger, but he drew, with other words, the outline for it. Most offended were the single older women, my husband’s classmates. They discussed me in the bathroom at parties when I was in the stall. What does he see in her? What do they talk about? They were concerned about me. They wielded their concern like a bludgeon. They paraphrased without meaning to my favorite line from Nabokov’s Lolita : “You took advantage of my disadvantage,” suspecting me of some weakness he in turn mined. It did not disturb them, so much, to consider that all relationships were trades. The trouble was the trade I’d made struck them as a bad one.

The truth is you can fall in love with someone for all sorts of reasons, tiny transactions, pluses and minuses, whose sum is your affection for each other, your loyalty, your commitment. The way someone picks up your favorite croissant. Their habit of listening hard. What they do for you on your anniversary and your reciprocal gesture, wrapped thoughtfully. The serenity they inspire; your happiness, enlivening it. When someone says they feel unappreciated, what they really mean is you’re in debt to them.

When I think of same-age, same-stage relationships, what I tend to picture is a woman who is doing too much for too little.

I’m 27 now, and most women my age have “partners.” These days, girls become partners quite young. A partner is supposed to be a modern answer to the oppression of marriage, the terrible feeling of someone looming over you, head of a household to which you can only ever be the neck. Necks are vulnerable. The problem with a partner, however, is if you’re equal in all things, you compromise in all things. And men are too skilled at taking .

There is a boy out there who knows how to floss because my friend taught him. Now he kisses college girls with fresh breath. A boy married to my friend who doesn’t know how to pack his own suitcase. She “likes to do it for him.” A million boys who know how to touch a woman, who go to therapy because they were pushed, who learned fidelity, boundaries, decency, manners, to use a top sheet and act humanely beneath it, to call their mothers, match colors, bring flowers to a funeral and inhale, exhale in the face of rage, because some girl, some girl we know, some girl they probably don’t speak to and will never, ever credit, took the time to teach him. All while she was working, raising herself, clawing up the cliff-face of adulthood. Hauling him at her own expense.

I find a post on Reddit where five thousand men try to define “ a woman’s touch .” They describe raised flower beds, blankets, photographs of their loved ones, not hers, sprouting on the mantel overnight. Candles, coasters, side tables. Someone remembering to take lint out of the dryer. To give compliments. I wonder what these women are getting back. I imagine them like Cinderella’s mice, scurrying around, their sole proof of life their contributions to a more central character. On occasion I meet a nice couple, who grew up together. They know each other with a fraternalism tender and alien to me.  But I think of all my friends who failed at this, were failed at this, and I think, No, absolutely not, too risky . Riskier, sometimes, than an age gap.

My younger brother is in his early 20s, handsome, successful, but in many ways: an endearing disaster. By his age, I had long since wisened up. He leaves his clothes in the dryer, takes out a single shirt, steams it for three minutes. His towel on the floor, for someone else to retrieve. His lovely, same-age girlfriend is aching to fix these tendencies, among others. She is capable beyond words. Statistically, they will not end up together. He moved into his first place recently, and she, the girlfriend, supplied him with a long, detailed list of things he needed for his apartment: sheets, towels, hangers, a colander, which made me laugh. She picked out his couch. I will bet you anything she will fix his laundry habits, and if so, they will impress the next girl. If they break up, she will never see that couch again, and he will forget its story. I tell her when I visit because I like her, though I get in trouble for it: You shouldn’t do so much for him, not for someone who is not stuck with you, not for any boy, not even for my wonderful brother.

Too much work had left my husband, by 30, jaded and uninspired. He’d burned out — but I could reenchant things. I danced at restaurants when they played a song I liked. I turned grocery shopping into an adventure, pleased by what I provided. Ambitious, hungry, he needed someone smart enough to sustain his interest, but flexible enough in her habits to build them around his hours. I could. I do: read myself occupied, make myself free, materialize beside him when he calls for me. In exchange, I left a lucrative but deadening spreadsheet job to write full-time, without having to live like a writer. I learned to cook, a little, and decorate, somewhat poorly. Mostly I get to read, to walk central London and Miami and think in delicious circles, to work hard, when necessary, for free, and write stories for far less than minimum wage when I tally all the hours I take to write them.

At 20, I had felt daunted by the project of becoming my ideal self, couldn’t imagine doing it in tandem with someone, two raw lumps of clay trying to mold one another and only sullying things worse. I’d go on dates with boys my age and leave with the impression they were telling me not about themselves but some person who didn’t exist yet and on whom I was meant to bet regardless. My husband struck me instead as so finished, formed. Analyzable for compatibility. He bore the traces of other women who’d improved him, small but crucial basics like use a coaster ; listen, don’t give advice. Young egos mellow into patience and generosity.

My husband isn’t my partner. He’s my mentor, my lover, and, only in certain contexts, my friend. I’ll never forget it, how he showed me around our first place like he was introducing me to myself: This is the wine you’ll drink, where you’ll keep your clothes, we vacation here, this is the other language we’ll speak, you’ll learn it, and I did. Adulthood seemed a series of exhausting obligations. But his logistics ran so smoothly that he simply tacked mine on. I moved into his flat, onto his level, drag and drop, cleaner thrice a week, bills automatic. By opting out of partnership in my 20s, I granted myself a kind of compartmentalized, liberating selfishness none of my friends have managed. I am the work in progress, the party we worry about, a surprising dominance. When I searched for my first job, at 21, we combined our efforts, for my sake. He had wisdom to impart, contacts with whom he arranged coffees; we spent an afternoon, laughing, drawing up earnest lists of my pros and cons (highly sociable; sloppy math). Meanwhile, I took calls from a dear friend who had a boyfriend her age. Both savagely ambitious, hyperclose and entwined in each other’s projects. If each was a start-up , the other was the first hire, an intense dedication I found riveting. Yet every time she called me, I hung up with the distinct feeling that too much was happening at the same time: both learning to please a boss; to forge more adult relationships with their families; to pay bills and taxes and hang prints on the wall. Neither had any advice to give and certainly no stability. I pictured a three-legged race, two people tied together and hobbling toward every milestone.

I don’t fool myself. My marriage has its cons. There are only so many times one can say “thank you” — for splendid scenes, fine dinners — before the phrase starts to grate. I live in an apartment whose rent he pays and that shapes the freedom with which I can ever be angry with him. He doesn’t have to hold it over my head. It just floats there, complicating usual shorthands to explain dissatisfaction like, You aren’t being supportive lately . It’s a Frenchism to say, “Take a decision,” and from time to time I joke: from whom? Occasionally I find myself in some fabulous country at some fabulous party and I think what a long way I have traveled, like a lucky cloud, and it is frightening to think of oneself as vapor.

Mostly I worry that if he ever betrayed me and I had to move on, I would survive, but would find in my humor, preferences, the way I make coffee or the bed nothing that he did not teach, change, mold, recompose, stamp with his initials, the way Renaissance painters hid in their paintings their faces among a crowd. I wonder if when they looked at their paintings, they saw their own faces first. But this is the wrong question, if our aim is happiness. Like the other question on which I’m expected to dwell: Who is in charge, the man who drives or the woman who put him there so she could enjoy herself? I sit in the car, in the painting it would have taken me a corporate job and 20 years to paint alone, and my concern over who has the upper hand becomes as distant as the horizon, the one he and I made so wide for me.

To be a woman is to race against the clock, in several ways, until there is nothing left to be but run ragged.

We try to put it off, but it will hit us at some point: that we live in a world in which our power has a different shape from that of men, a different distribution of advantage, ours a funnel and theirs an expanding cone. A woman at 20 rarely has to earn her welcome; a boy at 20 will be turned away at the door. A woman at 30 may find a younger woman has taken her seat; a man at 30 will have invited her. I think back to the women in the bathroom, my husband’s classmates. What was my relationship if not an inconvertible sign of this unfairness? What was I doing, in marrying older, if not endorsing it? I had taken advantage of their disadvantage. I had preempted my own. After all, principled women are meant to defy unfairness, to show some integrity or denial, not plan around it, like I had. These were driven women, successful, beautiful, capable. I merely possessed the one thing they had already lost. In getting ahead of the problem, had I pushed them down? If I hadn’t, would it really have made any difference?

When we decided we wanted to be equal to men, we got on men’s time. We worked when they worked, retired when they retired, had to squeeze pregnancy, children, menopause somewhere impossibly in the margins. I have a friend, in her late 20s, who wears a mood ring; these days it is often red, flickering in the air like a siren when she explains her predicament to me. She has raised her fair share of same-age boyfriends. She has put her head down, worked laboriously alongside them, too. At last she is beginning to reap the dividends, earning the income to finally enjoy herself. But it is now, exactly at this precipice of freedom and pleasure, that a time problem comes closing in. If she would like to have children before 35, she must begin her next profession, motherhood, rather soon, compromising inevitably her original one. The same-age partner, equally unsettled in his career, will take only the minimum time off, she guesses, or else pay some cost which will come back to bite her. Everything unfailingly does. If she freezes her eggs to buy time, the decision and its logistics will burden her singly — and perhaps it will not work. Overlay the years a woman is supposed to establish herself in her career and her fertility window and it’s a perfect, miserable circle. By midlife women report feeling invisible, undervalued; it is a telling cliché, that after all this, some husbands leave for a younger girl. So when is her time, exactly? For leisure, ease, liberty? There is no brand of feminism which achieved female rest. If women’s problem in the ’50s was a paralyzing malaise, now it is that they are too active, too capable, never permitted a vacation they didn’t plan. It’s not that our efforts to have it all were fated for failure. They simply weren’t imaginative enough.

For me, my relationship, with its age gap, has alleviated this rush , permitted me to massage the clock, shift its hands to my benefit. Very soon, we will decide to have children, and I don’t panic over last gasps of fun, because I took so many big breaths of it early: on the holidays of someone who had worked a decade longer than I had, in beautiful places when I was young and beautiful, a symmetry I recommend. If such a thing as maternal energy exists, mine was never depleted. I spent the last nearly seven years supported more than I support and I am still not as old as my husband was when he met me. When I have a child, I will expect more help from him than I would if he were younger, for what does professional tenure earn you if not the right to set more limits on work demands — or, if not, to secure some child care, at the very least? When I return to work after maternal upheaval, he will aid me, as he’s always had, with his ability to put himself aside, as younger men are rarely able.

Above all, the great gift of my marriage is flexibility. A chance to live my life before I become responsible for someone else’s — a lover’s, or a child’s. A chance to write. A chance at a destiny that doesn’t adhere rigidly to the routines and timelines of men, but lends itself instead to roomy accommodation, to the very fluidity Betty Friedan dreamed of in 1963 in The Feminine Mystique , but we’ve largely forgotten: some career or style of life that “permits year-to-year variation — a full-time paid job in one community, part-time in another, exercise of the professional skill in serious volunteer work or a period of study during pregnancy or early motherhood when a full-time job is not feasible.” Some things are just not feasible in our current structures. Somewhere along the way we stopped admitting that, and all we did was make women feel like personal failures. I dream of new structures, a world in which women have entry-level jobs in their 30s; alternate avenues for promotion; corporate ladders with balconies on which they can stand still, have a smoke, take a break, make a baby, enjoy themselves, before they keep climbing. Perhaps men long for this in their own way. Actually I am sure of that.

Once, when we first fell in love, I put my head in his lap on a long car ride; I remember his hands on my face, the sun, the twisting turns of a mountain road, surprising and not surprising us like our romance, and his voice, telling me that it was his biggest regret that I was so young, he feared he would lose me. Last week, we looked back at old photos and agreed we’d given each other our respective best years. Sometimes real equality is not so obvious, sometimes it takes turns, sometimes it takes almost a decade to reveal itself.

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