closing sentence for scholarship essay

How to Close a Scholarship Essay

How to Write a Scholarship Letter

You’re almost there! You’ve worked hard during high school. You’ve researched universities and narrowed down your favorite programs. Now you’ve written your scholarship essay—or most of it. All that remains is the hardest part: the conclusion. You know that the conclusion can make or break any essay, and this isn’t an essay that you want broken. To give yourself the best possible shot at a scholarship, make sure that the conclusion of your essay is the best part of it.

Make it Personal

Make your essay personal. This does not mean to over-share or to include inappropriate information. However, being personal does mean that your essay displays your voice as a writer and is not simply a resume of your accomplishments, according to the Office of Scholarships and Financial Aid at the University of Arizona. You’ll want to be personal throughout the scholarship essay, but it’s especially important when you’re closing, so the reader has a good understanding of who you are. You can be personal in many different ways, so decide which way works best for the essay you’ve written: humor, anecdotes, and thoughtfulness all go a long way to make readers feel like they know you.

Summarize Your Previous Accomplishments

Yes, you’ve already talked about how high your grades are. Yes, you’ve already stressed how involved in your community you are, and yes, you feel like you’re bragging. However, like every essay, a scholarship essay needs a concluding paragraph that summarizes what you’ve already discussed. Don’t dwell on details since you have accomplished this within the essay—but do highlight the most important parts.

Discuss what You Hope to Achieve in the Future

You don’t have to limit yourself to writing what you’ve already done in the conclusion of a scholarship essay. It’s also your chance to talk about what you plan to do in the future. The conclusion is a great place to look ahead as well as to look back states the Writing Center at the University of Michigan at Flint. If you’re applying for a scholarship then you have dreams for the future; don’t keep them in your diary—share them.

Discuss How the Scholarship Will Help You Achieve Your Goals

Scholarships take a lot of work to establish and evaluate. Scholarship committees want to know that the money they give makes a difference to the students who receive them. In addition to telling them what you want to do in the future, tell them how their scholarship will help you do it.

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• University of Arizona Financial Aid Office: Scholarship Essay Writing Tips

Living in Canada, Andrew Aarons has been writing professionally since 2003. He holds a Bachelor of Arts in English literature from the University of Ottawa, where he served as a writer and editor for the university newspaper. Aarons is also a certified computer-support technician.

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Scholarships in Ink

How to End Your Scholarship Essay

S tarting your scholarship essay with a strong introduction is vital.  The strong impact doesn’t stop with the start of your essay, however. You can have a powerful beginning, persuasive content, but completely lose the reader if your conclusion doesn’t leave a lasting impression. Because of this, the end of your scholarship essay is one of the most important pieces of the puzzle.

You want the donor to know you deserve their scholarship more than anyone else submitting an essay. Think of your conclusion as the bow that packages the entire essay to sell yourself as the best candidate.

First, let’s talk about what you should avoid in the closing paragraph.

1. don’t end your essay with “in conclusion.”.

University Language Services explains that this is redundant. By the time your reader reaches the end of the essay, it’s obvious that you’re concluding your thoughts.  Instead, use the last part of your scholarship essay to make the final sale. Use the beginning of the conclusion to talk about why you should be chosen for the scholarship.

2. Don’t use your conclusion to just summarize your essay.

Of course, you want to tie all your thoughts together with the pretty bow that I mentioned earlier.  Make it spectacular, though.  Bring all those thoughts together, and finish with your argument of why you deserve the scholarship. University Language Services notes that you should answer the question of “So what?” in your conclusion. Keep that cue in mind when making it count in the end.

3. Don’t dwell on the important details of your essay.

According to PocketSense , you’ve already talked about the key topics of your essay before you even get to your conclusion.  You don’t have to waste valuable word count by repeating yourself.  However, you can absolutely highlight the important parts that. Doing so will help the reader understand how those highlights make you an excellent candidate for the scholarship.

Now that we’ve talked about what not to do when writing the end of your scholarship essay, let’s touch on what you should do.

1. talk about the future..

In addition to highlighting the important parts of your past accomplishments in your essay, PocketSense recommends talking about your future plans and goals.  The conclusion of your scholarship essay is a great time to let the reader know what your future goals are, and how the scholarship will help you achieve that. This will help tie your past and present together, and show the scholarship judges the value in those thoughts.

2. Tie conclusion back to your introduction.

If you gave a powerful personal story in your introduction, the conclusion is a great time to bring the reader back to that.  For example, if you opened your scholarship essay talking about a specific personal story, the conclusion is a great time to tie back to that story and give it a great ending.  Essaypro.com explains that this helps gives the reader a more solid connection to you and the story.  If your reader has this connection, you’re much more likely to set yourself apart from the other candidates.

3. Use reflection to show personal growth.

Essaypro.com recommends using one of your weaknesses to show your reader how you used a challenge as a stepping stone.  Doing so shows personal growth, which is especially appealing for scholarship judges when they are finalizing their decisions on applicants.  Most people shy away from discussing their weaknesses and focus only on their strengths.  If you’re doing what most people do, you’re missing out on a great opportunity to show even more strengths to your reader!

4. Say thank you to the committee.

The scholarship committee is doing you a great service by potentially awarding you a sum of money towards your education.  The conclusion of your scholarship essay is an appropriate time to thank them for considering your application.

5. Edit and revise.

Now that you’ve written your scholarship essay and concluded all your thoughts with the pretty bow on the package, one of the most important parts of the ending is to edit and revise.  Be sure to have a parent or teacher (or both!) proofread your entire essay, and offer any advice on edits that need to be made.

You can have a stellar intro, body, and conclusion. You can have a powerful voice through the entire essay, with some great examples of your personal achievements and plans for the future. However, if you fail to have a grammatically sound scholarship essay, you will lose your reader and reduce your influence.  All that hard work and valuable thoughts can be diminished.

Take the time to put that final bow on the package, and get ready to hand it off to the scholarship essay committee!

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• Knowledge Base
• How to conclude an essay | Interactive example

How to Conclude an Essay | Interactive Example

Published on January 24, 2019 by Shona McCombes . Revised on July 23, 2023.

The conclusion is the final paragraph of your essay . A strong conclusion aims to:

• Tie together the essay’s main points
• Show why your argument matters
• Leave the reader with a strong impression

Your conclusion should give a sense of closure and completion to your argument, but also show what new questions or possibilities it has opened up.

This conclusion is taken from our annotated essay example , which discusses the history of the Braille system. Hover over each part to see why it’s effective.

Braille paved the way for dramatic cultural changes in the way blind people were treated and the opportunities available to them. Louis Braille’s innovation was to reimagine existing reading systems from a blind perspective, and the success of this invention required sighted teachers to adapt to their students’ reality instead of the other way around. In this sense, Braille helped drive broader social changes in the status of blindness. New accessibility tools provide practical advantages to those who need them, but they can also change the perspectives and attitudes of those who do not.

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Table of contents

Step 1: return to your thesis, step 2: review your main points, step 3: show why it matters, what shouldn’t go in the conclusion, more examples of essay conclusions, other interesting articles, frequently asked questions about writing an essay conclusion.

To begin your conclusion, signal that the essay is coming to an end by returning to your overall argument.

Don’t just repeat your thesis statement —instead, try to rephrase your argument in a way that shows how it has been developed since the introduction.

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Next, remind the reader of the main points that you used to support your argument.

Avoid simply summarizing each paragraph or repeating each point in order; try to bring your points together in a way that makes the connections between them clear. The conclusion is your final chance to show how all the paragraphs of your essay add up to a coherent whole.

To wrap up your conclusion, zoom out to a broader view of the topic and consider the implications of your argument. For example:

• Does it contribute a new understanding of your topic?
• Does it raise new questions for future study?
• Does it lead to practical suggestions or predictions?
• Can it be applied to different contexts?
• Can it be connected to a broader debate or theme?

Whatever your essay is about, the conclusion should aim to emphasize the significance of your argument, whether that’s within your academic subject or in the wider world.

Try to end with a strong, decisive sentence, leaving the reader with a lingering sense of interest in your topic.

The easiest way to improve your conclusion is to eliminate these common mistakes.

Don’t include new evidence

Any evidence or analysis that is essential to supporting your thesis statement should appear in the main body of the essay.

The conclusion might include minor pieces of new information—for example, a sentence or two discussing broader implications, or a quotation that nicely summarizes your central point. But it shouldn’t introduce any major new sources or ideas that need further explanation to understand.

Don’t use “concluding phrases”

Avoid using obvious stock phrases to tell the reader what you’re doing:

• “In conclusion…”
• “To sum up…”

These phrases aren’t forbidden, but they can make your writing sound weak. By returning to your main argument, it will quickly become clear that you are concluding the essay—you shouldn’t have to spell it out.

Don’t undermine your argument

Avoid using apologetic phrases that sound uncertain or confused:

• “This is just one approach among many.”
• “There are good arguments on both sides of this issue.”
• “There is no clear answer to this problem.”

Even if your essay has explored different points of view, your own position should be clear. There may be many possible approaches to the topic, but you want to leave the reader convinced that yours is the best one!

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This conclusion is taken from an argumentative essay about the internet’s impact on education. It acknowledges the opposing arguments while taking a clear, decisive position.

The internet has had a major positive impact on the world of education; occasional pitfalls aside, its value is evident in numerous applications. The future of teaching lies in the possibilities the internet opens up for communication, research, and interactivity. As the popularity of distance learning shows, students value the flexibility and accessibility offered by digital education, and educators should fully embrace these advantages. The internet’s dangers, real and imaginary, have been documented exhaustively by skeptics, but the internet is here to stay; it is time to focus seriously on its potential for good.

This conclusion is taken from a short expository essay that explains the invention of the printing press and its effects on European society. It focuses on giving a clear, concise overview of what was covered in the essay.

The invention of the printing press was important not only in terms of its immediate cultural and economic effects, but also in terms of its major impact on politics and religion across Europe. In the century following the invention of the printing press, the relatively stationary intellectual atmosphere of the Middle Ages gave way to the social upheavals of the Reformation and the Renaissance. A single technological innovation had contributed to the total reshaping of the continent.

This conclusion is taken from a literary analysis essay about Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein . It summarizes what the essay’s analysis achieved and emphasizes its originality.

By tracing the depiction of Frankenstein through the novel’s three volumes, I have demonstrated how the narrative structure shifts our perception of the character. While the Frankenstein of the first volume is depicted as having innocent intentions, the second and third volumes—first in the creature’s accusatory voice, and then in his own voice—increasingly undermine him, causing him to appear alternately ridiculous and vindictive. Far from the one-dimensional villain he is often taken to be, the character of Frankenstein is compelling because of the dynamic narrative frame in which he is placed. In this frame, Frankenstein’s narrative self-presentation responds to the images of him we see from others’ perspectives. This conclusion sheds new light on the novel, foregrounding Shelley’s unique layering of narrative perspectives and its importance for the depiction of character.

If you want to know more about AI tools , college essays , or fallacies make sure to check out some of our other articles with explanations and examples or go directly to our tools!

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Your essay’s conclusion should contain:

• A rephrased version of your overall thesis
• A brief review of the key points you made in the main body
• An indication of why your argument matters

The conclusion may also reflect on the broader implications of your argument, showing how your ideas could applied to other contexts or debates.

For a stronger conclusion paragraph, avoid including:

• Important evidence or analysis that wasn’t mentioned in the main body
• Generic concluding phrases (e.g. “In conclusion…”)
• Weak statements that undermine your argument (e.g. “There are good points on both sides of this issue.”)

Your conclusion should leave the reader with a strong, decisive impression of your work.

The conclusion paragraph of an essay is usually shorter than the introduction . As a rule, it shouldn’t take up more than 10–15% of the text.

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• Writing Tips

​How to Write a Scholarship Essay (With Examples)

• 6-minute read
• 22nd August 2022

Writing a scholarship essay can seem like a daunting task. For many students , higher education isn’t possible without financial aid, and scholarships are especially valuable because the money awarded doesn’t have to be paid back.

Even though the stakes are high, there are a few manageable steps you can take to ensure you write a great essay to submit with your scholarship applications. We have a few top tips to help you get started, along with writing examples to demonstrate some key points. Check out our guide below to learn more.

A scholarship essay is a great opportunity to present yourself and your accomplishments in an impactful way. It is, therefore, essential to be aware of each scholarship deadline so you can allow sufficient time for the writing process, which typically includes the following:

·   Read the essay prompt and brainstorm ideas.

·   Create an outline covering the key points you want to address.

·   Write a draft and seek feedback from trusted teachers, family, or friends.

·   Make any necessary revisions and proofread before submitting your final draft.

Scholarship review committees will be able to tell if you rushed through your essay, so give yourself the best chance of winning an award by staying organized and on schedule!

Who and What?

Researching the scholarship provider and diligently reviewing the essay prompts can help you write an essay that makes you stand out as a top candidate.

1. Who are you writing to?

Learn more about the organization offering the scholarship and why the scholarship fund was created.

For instance, a scholarship may honor its organization’s founder, and the founder’s qualities (e.g., integrity, good citizenship, and leadership) might be the same values guiding the scholarship program as a way to continue the founder’s legacy.

If you identify with any of the same qualities, you can incorporate those keywords into your essay to demonstrate your shared values. Remember to remain authentic, though!

2. What are you writing about?

You must read the essay prompt carefully to identify precisely what you need to accomplish with your essay.

Some prompts ask about your career goals and how you plan to achieve them or your achievements and the challenges you overcame to reach them.

You’ll write about common topics across multiple scholarship applications – some may even be similar to your college admission essay – so you can repurpose your essays as long as you’re diligent about tailoring each one to its prompt.

Your application will likely require other items such as transcripts and test scores, but the essay is your chance to offer something entirely unique. Write about key experiences that highlight who you are and what you’ve accomplished, or you could mention something you’re passionate about.

Remember to follow any specific instructions regarding length and formatting, and be sure to answer all questions listed in the prompt. It can hurt your chances if you’re unable to show the committee that you’re detail-oriented and can follow directions.

Structuring Your Essay

Your essay should follow a standard format that includes a clear beginning, middle, and end. Typically, you should:

·   Establish your main idea in the introduction.

·   Include a separate body paragraph for each key point that supports your main idea.

·   Draw it all together and revisit your main idea in the conclusion.

Scholarship committees read thousands of essays each year. And often, there are hundreds of applicants for an award that can only go to a select few candidates. Writing a powerful introduction and conclusion gives you a chance to make a lasting impression.

1. Introduction

Write an introduction that hooks the reader and encourages them to stay engaged till the end of your essay. Don’t be afraid to add personal, tangible details and an anecdote .

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For example, if you’re writing about your career goals, demonstrate why you’ve chosen that career:

It was the biggest game of the season, and the stands were packed despite the bitter cold. My heart was beating louder than all of the cheers, and I was filled with the anticipation that one more run into the end zone would give us the championship. Everything went silent during that run when the tackle shattered both my leg and my dreams.

My world has always revolved around being an athlete – until one day it couldn’t. I spent many frustrating months rehabilitating, but I got through it because of my dedicated physical therapist, who helped me recover both physically and mentally after a devastating loss. And it was that profound experience that led me to pursue a career in the exercise sciences.

2. Conclusion

The conclusion is the last thing your reader will see, so it’s another opportunity for you to make your essay memorable.

Rather than summarizing with a general statement such as “this is why you should award me a scholarship,” perhaps explain what the financial assistance will help you achieve:

My parents never had the opportunity to go to college, and neither did their parents. I watched them work hard every day just to make ends meet, and I often questioned whether I could achieve anything more. Nevertheless, I spent four years working as hard as I saw my parents work, and I beat the odds by getting accepted to college. A scholarship could be invaluable for me, as it would allow me to attend and be successful without having to worry about finances.

Persuasive Writing

While you don’t want your scholarship essay to be overly informal, you’re certainly allowed to add some creativity and personal details to help persuade your readers.

One of the best ways to do so is by writing with the modes of persuasion ; that is, ethos, pathos, and logos.

Demonstrate your credibility. Use your real-life experiences and interesting details to establish, for example, how you’ve contributed to your community:

I saw how much bullying was impacting so many students at my school, so I founded my high school’s first anti-bullying club and organized campaigns to bring attention to the harm that people can cause one another.

Evoke an emotional response. The “show, don’t tell ” writing technique, which involves using descriptive words when discussing actions and emotions, can be especially useful here:

During one of our first awareness assemblies, the theater was completely silent as I read aloud anonymous stories from students about the scars bullying had left on their lives. Tears were stinging in my eyes as I described the struggles my classmates were facing, but I persevered to give a voice to those who didn’t have one.

Convey your point with reason and facts. Use statistics to demonstrate what you’ve accomplished:

In the first year alone, our club improved students’ feelings of safety and acceptance at our school by 53%.

Proofreading and Editing

Don’t forget the importance of proofreading your essay, as spelling and grammar mistakes can leave a bad impression on your reader. Our expert editors can help ensure your writing is clear, concise, and error-free. Give yourself a better chance at impressing scholarship committees by submitting a free trial document today!

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How to Start a Scholarship Essay (With Examples)

Will Geiger is the co-founder of Scholarships360 and has a decade of experience in college admissions and financial aid. He is a former Senior Assistant Director of Admissions at Kenyon College where he personally reviewed 10,000 admissions applications and essays. Will also managed the Kenyon College merit scholarship program and served on the financial aid appeals committee. He has also worked as an Associate Director of College Counseling at a high school in New Haven, Connecticut. Will earned his master’s in education from the University of Pennsylvania and received his undergraduate degree in history from Wake Forest University.

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Bill Jack has over a decade of experience in college admissions and financial aid. Since 2008, he has worked at Colby College, Wesleyan University, University of Maine at Farmington, and Bates College.

Maria Geiger is Director of Content at Scholarships360. She is a former online educational technology instructor and adjunct writing instructor. In addition to education reform, Maria’s interests include viewpoint diversity, blended/flipped learning, digital communication, and integrating media/web tools into the curriculum to better facilitate student engagement. Maria earned both a B.A. and an M.A. in English Literature from Monmouth University, an M. Ed. in Education from Monmouth University, and a Virtual Online Teaching Certificate (VOLT) from the University of Pennsylvania.

As an admissions officer, I reviewed thousands of essays for students seeking admission and scholarships. The essay is one of the most important parts of the scholarship application process–a strong essay can go a long way. However, with so much competition, it is important for your scholarship essay to stand out. That’s why it’s important for you to start a scholarship essay off right!

There are some very simple things that you can do to ensure that your essay is engaging from the very first sentence. In fact, beginning your essay with an exciting opening is one of the most important things you can do, because it will immediately distinguish your essay from the others. 

Keep on reading to learn more about how you can nail the very first sentence and start your essay off right!

Engage the reader with the first sentence

No matter what type of essay you are writing, you will want to ensure that the very first line grabs the attention of the reader. One of the biggest mistakes that students make when starting their essay is simply restating the prompt. This is bland and boring. 

Now, you might be wondering, “how do I engage the reader with the very first line of my essay?”. The good news is that there are several ways that you can do this that are very simple to do. 

Related:  How to answer scholarship essay questions about your career goals

Begin with dialogue

First, you could begin your essay with conversation. This can be an interesting and unexpected way to start your scholarship essay. Maybe someone asked you an unexpected question? Perhaps you were having an interesting conversation with a friend or family member? Either way, dialogue can be a powerful tool to start your essay.

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Put the reader in your shoes.

Alternatively, you can choose to start your essay by placing the reader right in your shoes and show them something from your life. Appeal to the senses and show the reader what you see, hear, smell, or taste. These specific details will help your essay come to life and make it even more memorable. 

Also recommended: What’s the best scholarship essay format?

Scholarship essay introduction example

Next,  we’ll look at a specific example of how you can open up your essay. Let’s say you are applying for the Questbridge scholarship program . One of the essays that you will be asked is:

We are interested in learning more about you and the context in which you have grown up, formed your aspirations, and accomplished your academic successes. Please describe the factors and challenges that have most influenced you. How are they shaping your future aspirations?

You might be tempted to rephrase the question and start your essay with something like:

“I have grown up in a rural context and this has formed my aspirations and allowed me to accomplish academic success…”

This is generic and will not engage your reader at all. 

Instead, what if you started off your essay with something like this:

“I look outside my bedroom window and see Henry, my favorite chicken, pecking at something in the dirt.” 

Makes a big difference, right? As a reader, you are probably wondering: why does this person have chickens outside their bedroom window? Why did they name this particular chicken Henry?

See also: Here are our top writing & essay scholarships for students!

Keep the ending of your essay in mind as you write the opening

While crafting your opening, be open to ideas about how to close your essay. There is no need to stress about the ending now, but being mindful of effective ways to end an essay is always a good idea. Say you are opening your scholarship essay with Henry the chicken. Is there a way for Henry to make an impactful appearance at the end of the essay to close things out in a way that perfectly wraps everything up? The key is for the essay ending to be meaningful and memorable for the reader. 

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If you can’t think of a “wow” scholarship essay beginning, keep writing!

Sometimes, we know what we want to say, point by point, but we are not ready to be creative when it comes to opening an essay. In that case, keep writing! There is always the option of going back and crafting an engaging opening after your essay is written. Simply write your main idea where the first paragraph would be to guide you as you write. After, go back when your creative juices are flowing, and craft the amazing opening (and closing) that your scholarship essay deserves!

Final thoughts

As shown, there are many questions that we as readers will have after reading an engaging essay opening such as the one just shared; We want to learn more about the student who is writing this essay. After all, as a writer trying to stand out in a pile of essays, that is our main goal. 

We hope that you have a better understanding of how to start a scholarship essay so you can maximize your chances of winning scholarships!

Additional resources

Scholarships360 is the go-to for all things college admissions and scholarships! Wondering how to write a 250 word essay and how to write a 500 word essay ? Curious how to write an essay about yourself ? Wow, do we have the resources to help! Additionally, check out our free scholarship search tool to help you finance your college education. Best of luck to you and your future endeavors! 

Key Takeaways

• The first sentence of the essay is what makes the reader want to continue reading 
• Engage the reader by appealing to the senses
• Create a sense of wonder in your essay, making the reader want to learn more about you
• Keep the ending of the essay in mind as you craft the beginning

Frequently asked questions about how to start a scholarship essay

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The Ultimate Guide To Writing a Winning Scholarship Essay

Stand out from the rest.

With the cost of higher education skyrocketing in the last few decades, it’s no surprise that many students seek out scholarships to help cover tuition. As a result, it’s a very competitive endeavor, which is why students need to find ways to stand out. We’ve put together this resource to help write a scholarship essay that will get the application committee’s attention.

How To Find Scholarships

Many students know that they want to apply for scholarships but don’t know where to find them. Honestly, this can be the most difficult and intimidating part of the process for students! Here are some suggestions for where to start. 

Ask a Guidance Counselor

One of the best resources for high school students is their guidance counselor. They are prepared to help students make academic and career plans and should be aware of scholarship opportunities to align with your needs and goals. 

Talk to the College or University

Already have a college or university picked out? Reach out to the school’s financial aid department. In addition to the many scholarships you can find online, they may offer information about funding offered directly through the school. 

Submit a FAFSA Application

Even if a student isn’t planning to accept student loans, they should definitely consider completing a Free Application for Federal Student Aid (FAFSA). Not only will the resulting report inform them of any financial assistance for which they qualify, but many scholarship committees require applicants to submit a FAFSA. 

Search Scholarship Websites

There are many scholarship websites where students can find awards and applications. Sites such as Scholarships.com and Scholarship 360 allow you to use filters to narrow down your search results based on your needs and interests. 

We’ve also put together the following guides:

• How To Get a Full-Ride Scholarship
• Best Merit-Based Scholarships  
• Excellent Scholarships for High School Seniors
• Great Scholarships for Black Students
• Scholarships for Women
• Best Scholarship Opportunities for Future Teachers

Do an Internet Search

Head to a search engine, social media platform, or sites like Reddit to look for scholarships. You can even create posts inviting other users to share suggestions.

Ask an Employer

Some workplaces offer tuition benefits or other financial assistance for higher education. If a student is employed, it’s an option to reach out to someone in the HR department to see if they offer any programs or scholarships. 

The Dos and Don’ts of Writing a Scholarship Essay

Do: know the rules.

The most important thing anyone can do before writing a scholarship essay is this: Read all of the rules and guidelines and then reread them! Students can even ask someone else to read them too, to make sure they fully understand what they need to do. Failing to follow the rules is one of the main reasons why students are unsuccessful in getting scholarships. 

Do: Set Aside Plenty of Time

Start working on scholarship essays right away. Do not wait until a week (or day!) before the deadline. This gives students time to write several drafts of the essay if needed. Also, you never know when a technology-related issue might strike, so having a little extra time can save you from disaster. 

Do: Research the Scholarship Provider

Dig deep when applying for a scholarship. Find out who is funding the award and spend some time researching the provider. Do they have a vision or mission statement? Do they support any specific causes or types of students? Is there any way that applicants can make themselves more attractive candidates for the specific audience? Students should use this information to their advantage! 

Do: Brainstorm

Students should take some time to think about what they’ve learned about the scholarship essay guidelines and the provider. Then, brainstorm about what they want to say and share and why. Here are some questions to ask as they pertain to education and career goals:

• Who are you? Think of yourself but also your background.
• What makes you who you are?
• What have you done?
• What do you want to do?
• How are you going to get there?
• Why do you need a scholarship?
• How will it make a difference?
• Are you a first-generation college student?
• Do you have any unique qualities or needs?
• What makes you proud?
• What lessons have you learned?

These are heavy questions, but finding the answers to at least some of them will help provide the substance needed to write a truly effective scholarship essay. 

Do: Find Ways To Stand Out

Many, many students are applying for scholarships. They have to find a way to stand out from the rest. Students should think of the things they learned when they researched the scholarship provider. Are there any ways they can appeal to that audience? If so, focus on those areas. 

Do: Be Honest

Do not lie on a scholarship application. Let’s say that again: Do not lie on a scholarship application. Students should remind themselves that they are worthy on their own. If an applicant is discovered to be dishonest, it can really hurt them in the long run. 

Do: Stay on Topic

When reading the guidelines for the scholarship and doing brainstorming, be sure to keep the topic of the essay in mind. Everything students share and communicate should be related to the topic. 

Do: Be Professional

Students should use their very best skills when writing a scholarship essay. They should not use slang, casual language, unconventional fonts, emojis, or texting abbreviations. 

Do: Proofread and Edit Multiple Times

It’s a good idea to prepare to write this essay at least three times. First, there’s a rough draft that should be carefully proofread. Students can ask a teacher or other professional to also look at their paper. Then students should repeat this process once or twice more until they’re happy with the results. They shouldn’t just write it and submit it all at once! 

Don’t: Brag

While students want to highlight their strengths and accomplishments, they should not brag. They also don’t want to put down other candidates or people to make themselves look good. Tell a story without embellishments. 

Don’t: Reuse a Scholarship Essay

Students put a lot of effort into writing scholarship essays, but please don’t reuse them! 

Scholarship Essay Sample Outline

Ready to get started? Having a solid outline provides a road map for the journey. Here are some suggestions for making it easier to write a scholarship essay! 

Introduction

Students should explain who they are and try to make it engaging. Hook readers by sharing a few details that will be elaborated on in the body of the essay. 

Educational and Career Goals

Students should share what they want to study and hope to gain by getting an education, as well as how it will prepare them for their future career. They should be passionate! 

Who Are You?

Student should briefly explain their background, which can include details about family, personal values, and how they got to where they are today. 

Why Are You a Good Candidate for the Scholarship?

This is where students need to really think about what they learned about the scholarship provider. What are they looking for in a candidate? Students should do their best to not only shine as a good student and leader, but also find solid ways to connect with the scholarship provider’s mission. After including some teasers or breadcrumbs in the introduction to hook the reader, this is a good place to share the rest of the story. 

To wrap up a scholarship essay, students should reiterate their commitment to their education and career. Restate how the story shared demonstrates a readiness for college and how winning the scholarship can help the applicant follow their dreams. Best of luck!

Do you have tips on how to write a scholarship essay? Share them below! Plus, check out  The Ultimate Guide to College Scholarships!

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10 Winning Scholarship Essay Examples From Real Students

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So much is at stake in writing a conclusion. This is, after all, your last chance to persuade your readers to your point of view, to impress yourself upon them as a writer and thinker. And the impression you create in your conclusion will shape the impression that stays with your readers after they've finished the essay.

The end of an essay should therefore convey a sense of completeness and closure as well as a sense of the lingering possibilities of the topic, its larger meaning, its implications: the final paragraph should close the discussion without closing it off.

To establish a sense of closure, you might do one or more of the following:

• Conclude by linking the last paragraph to the first, perhaps by reiterating a word or phrase you used at the beginning.
• Conclude with a sentence composed mainly of one-syllable words. Simple language can help create an effect of understated drama.
• Conclude with a sentence that's compound or parallel in structure; such sentences can establish a sense of balance or order that may feel just right at the end of a complex discussion.

To close the discussion without closing it off, you might do one or more of the following:

• Conclude with a quotation from or reference to a primary or secondary source, one that amplifies your main point or puts it in a different perspective. A quotation from, say, the novel or poem you're writing about can add texture and specificity to your discussion; a critic or scholar can help confirm or complicate your final point. For example, you might conclude an essay on the idea of home in James Joyce's short story collection,  Dubliners , with information about Joyce's own complex feelings towards Dublin, his home. Or you might end with a biographer's statement about Joyce's attitude toward Dublin, which could illuminate his characters' responses to the city. Just be cautious, especially about using secondary material: make sure that you get the last word.
• Conclude by setting your discussion into a different, perhaps larger, context. For example, you might end an essay on nineteenth-century muckraking journalism by linking it to a current news magazine program like  60 Minutes .
• Conclude by redefining one of the key terms of your argument. For example, an essay on Marx's treatment of the conflict between wage labor and capital might begin with Marx's claim that the "capitalist economy is . . . a gigantic enterprise of dehumanization "; the essay might end by suggesting that Marxist analysis is itself dehumanizing because it construes everything in economic -- rather than moral or ethical-- terms.
• Conclude by considering the implications of your argument (or analysis or discussion). What does your argument imply, or involve, or suggest? For example, an essay on the novel  Ambiguous Adventure , by the Senegalese writer Cheikh Hamidou Kane, might open with the idea that the protagonist's development suggests Kane's belief in the need to integrate Western materialism and Sufi spirituality in modern Senegal. The conclusion might make the new but related point that the novel on the whole suggests that such an integration is (or isn't) possible.

Finally, some advice on how not to end an essay:

• Don't simply summarize your essay. A brief summary of your argument may be useful, especially if your essay is long--more than ten pages or so. But shorter essays tend not to require a restatement of your main ideas.
• Avoid phrases like "in conclusion," "to conclude," "in summary," and "to sum up." These phrases can be useful--even welcome--in oral presentations. But readers can see, by the tell-tale compression of the pages, when an essay is about to end. You'll irritate your audience if you belabor the obvious.
• Resist the urge to apologize. If you've immersed yourself in your subject, you now know a good deal more about it than you can possibly include in a five- or ten- or 20-page essay. As a result, by the time you've finished writing, you may be having some doubts about what you've produced. (And if you haven't immersed yourself in your subject, you may be feeling even more doubtful about your essay as you approach the conclusion.) Repress those doubts. Don't undercut your authority by saying things like, "this is just one approach to the subject; there may be other, better approaches. . ."

Copyright 1998, Pat Bellanca, for the Writing Center at Harvard University

Scholarship Essay Examples

With college tuition costs rising each year, many students apply for merit scholarships to help make college more affordable. However, merit scholarships can be competitive—and that’s where our scholarship essay examples come in. By reading our scholarship essay examples, you can learn what it takes to write an award-winning essay. 

Scholarships are an excellent opportunity for students to lessen their college tuition costs. Most merit scholarships require a brief application, usually including one or more essays. Below, we’ve rounded up our best scholarship essay examples.

Reading winning scholarship essay examples, especially scholarship essay examples about yourself, can help you begin the scholarship essay process. By reviewing essay examples, you can learn how to craft a strong essay. You’ll also get a better sense of what scholarship committees look for when they review applications.

In this guide to Scholarship Essay Examples, you’ll find tips on how to write the best scholarship essay, as well as:

• Various scholarship essay examples about yourself
• A strong scholarship essay sample about why I deserve the scholarship
• Scholarship essay examples about financial need, and more!

We’ve included scholarship essay examples specific to schools, including UC Berkeley, as well as specific programs, like the SHPE scholarship. We’ll also discuss the different types of scholarships you’ll find on your scholarship search. 

Now, before we jump into our essay examples, let’s learn more about getting scholarship money for college.

What is a scholarship essay?

A scholarship essay is an essay you’ll include in your merit scholarship applications. In many ways, your scholarship essays might resemble your college essays. So, the scholarship essay format should seem familiar. 

The best scholarship essays will highlight who you are and why you deserve money for college. Scholarship essay prompts will ask you to include various information, from details about your background to explanations of why you deserve a scholarship.

Crafting a compelling, well-written essay can help you win substantial financial awards to help cover your college tuition costs. However, not all scholarship essays are the same. Later on, we’ll review different winning scholarship essay examples to show you what kind of essays you’ll write in your application process.

Types of Scholarships

There are many different types of scholarships available to students. You can find a variety of scholarship opportunities on scholarships websites. The earlier you start your scholarship search, the more scholarships you’ll find. 

While some scholarship applications accept applicants of all backgrounds and abilities, some have very specific eligibility guidelines. So, you may not be eligible for every scholarship. If you’re not sure whether or not you’re eligible, you can find eligibility information on most scholarships websites. 

Here are a few different scholarship types you may come across in your scholarship search:

• Academic scholarships
• Merit scholarships
• Essay competitions
• Community service scholarships
• Military scholarships

Scholarship essay prompts will differ across programs. As you’ll see in our winning scholarship essay examples, the prompts can vary in word count and complexity. We’ll provide you with descriptive essay examples to help you get an idea of what to expect.

Merit-Based Scholarships

Most scholarships we’ll highlight in this article are merit-based scholarships . A merit-based scholarship is money awarded by a college or community organization based on your academic achievements. 

In contrast, a need-based scholarship is awarded based on a student’s financial need. If you are applying for financial aid, be sure to check out our scholarship essay examples about financial need. You’ll find both merit- and need-based scholarships on your scholarship search.     

To qualify for a merit-based scholarship, you generally must meet specific criteria. Scholarship committees look at your grades, academic achievements, extracurriculars, and even test scores. Need-based scholarships can have similar requirements, but they’re primarily concerned with your family’s financial status.

There are many merit-based scholarships available to help students afford college, including:

• National merit scholarships
• Gates Scholarship
• Jack Kent Cooke Scholarship
• Robertson Scholarship

Check out our guides on these popular merit-based scholarships for more details. There, you’ll find tips on how to write a winning essay. Our descriptive essay examples can also help prepare you to apply to these programs After all, while prompts vary, the scholarship essay format remains fairly standard. 

Finding scholarships

In this guide, we’ll highlight some scholarships you may be eligible for. However, make sure to check out the rest of our resources to help you approach the scholarship search. 

Some scholarships we’ll discuss include:

• QuestBridge scholarship : helps low-income students attend elite colleges
• Park scholarships : for students attending NC State University
• SHPE scholarship : offers financial assistance for Hispanic students interested in STEM degrees. 

Scholarship essay examples about financial need will help you prepare for your scholarship applications. For instance, if you apply for the SHPE scholarship, you’ll include a lot of details about your background. 

You can also use scholarship search portals or scholarships websites to find other scholarships you may be eligible for. 

How do you write a scholarship essay?

While scholarship essay prompts may differ, you’ll usually stick to the same general scholarship essay format. 

One resource that can help you write the best scholarship essays and find money for college is Sallie Mae. Sallie Mae is a private lender offering undergraduate, graduate, and professional student loans. They also grant scholarships and provide aspiring college students with a scholarship search portal on their scholarships websites. Here’s what they have to say about having a winning scholarship essay format.

Organization

When writing a scholarship essay, it’s best to start with a scholarship essay format that organizes your thoughts. This will allow you to follow a plan that clearly and concisely gets your points across. You should begin your essay with a solid introduction. Then, introduce your supporting arguments and add an appropriate conclusion. 

A good scholarship essay clearly states why you deserve to win money for college with evidence to back up your argument. You’ll see how to do this in our scholarship essay sample about why I deserve the scholarship. The best scholarship essays will be original and honest. It should be written in an inspirational and positive tone, highlighting your strengths and capabilities. 

When you feel like you have put your best foot forward, you should ask others for their feedback. This can be from a teacher, counselor, or one of our advisors here at CollegeAdvisor! Proofread your final essay and make sure you’ve caught any spelling and grammatical errors before submitting your application.

Up next, we’ll get into our descriptive essay examples and the different scholarship essay prompts they responded to. 

By looking at scholarship essay examples, you can learn what exactly makes a good essay. So, let’s look at some descriptive essay examples written by students looking to secure money for college. 

First, we will walk you through scholarship essay examples about yourself. Then, we’ll look at a scholarship essay sample about why I deserve the scholarship. Lastly, we will provide you with scholarship essay examples about financial need. Remember to keep these scholarship essay examples in mind when writing essays of your own!

Scholarship Essay Examples About Yourself

Let’s take a closer look at some scholarship essay examples about yourself.

Scholarship essay prompts vary quite a bit, so make sure you understand what the prompt really asks of you. That way, you can answer the question or address the prompt in its entirety.

Some scholarship essay prompts may ask how the scholarship will make a difference for you. They may also ask about any contributions you have made to your community. 

Ready to look at some winning scholarship essay examples? Check out these scholarship essay examples below.

The first of our scholarship essays is for Phi Sigma Rho. Here’s the prompt: 

How do you promote Phi Sigma Rho and STEM on your campus or in your community? (300 words Max)

Phi sigma rho scholarship essay.

In my campus and community, I strive to promote Phi Sigma Rho and STEM by promoting Phi Rho’s values and sharing my experiences and passion for Phi Rho.

My involvement in the Women in Engineering Program (WEP) and Society of Women Engineers (SWE) has allowed me the opportunity to promote Phi Rho and STEM. These activities have given me insight into how to successfully create a network that will support and encourage women in engineering to continue their careers. 

Within WEP, I served as a sophomore orientation leader (Envoy), mentoring first-year women and assisting with program logistics. As an envoy, I was able to promote Phi Rho ideals of friendship and encouragement. I was also able to informally recruit for Phi Rho by sharing my experiences and passion for the sorority.

Within SWE, I was the Internal Relations Chair my freshmen year and am the Director of Member Engagement this year. Both roles are related to member engagement, allowing me to promote friendship within engineering. Member engagement is important for creating a community among female engineers. Similar to my envoy position, my leadership within SWE has allowed me to share my love for Phi Rho.

Additionally, my volunteer experience with Engineering Ambassadors (EA), a STEM outreach group, has allowed me to promote STEM in the community. In EA, I give presentations on engineering, speak on panels, and lead hands-on activities for K-12 students. EA has taught me strategies to promote STEM to children and teenagers.

Because of Phi Sigma Rho, I have the confidence to inspire and encourage the next generation of female engineers. I hold the values of scholarship, friendship, and encouragement in the highest regard and strive to embody those in every leadership position and volunteer role. Through SWE, WEP, and EA, I have promoted Phi Sigma Rho, its values, and STEM as a whole in both my campus and community.

This is, in many ways, a scholarship essay sample about why I deserve the scholarship. The writer clearly highlights how they’ve engaged with Phi Sigma Rho and how their values align with those of the organization. The writer also provides specific examples of their leadership positions, skills, and accolades. 

The next two of our scholarship essay examples about yourself are for the SHPE scholarship. Here they are: 

SHPE Scholarship essay example #1

Essay prompt:.

Summarize your life experiences and any challenges that have impacted your path to higher education. (250 Words) 

Essay Example:

I vividly remember the first day of First Grade because I didn’t know the Pledge of Allegiance like the rest of my classmates. Growing up in a Hispanic household, I had never learned what the pledge was. This was the beginning of several years of disconnect. 

From receiving weird looks when I told classmates my family opened Christmas gifts at midnight, to my parents’ confusion when I didn’t want them to speak Spanish in public, both sides of my life never understood the other. As a result, I always felt out of place in school, like I was behind in some way because I didn’t share the same upbringing as my classmates. In contrast, academics felt like a level playing field, something we were all learning together in the same way.

While I couldn’t tell you who won the super bowl, I could do mathematics or read just as well, if not better, than my classmates. Socially, I always felt out of place, but academically I was always comfortable, and as a result, I tried to excel in that area of my life. That desire to succeed created the relentless work ethic I have today and the appreciation I have for education.

Despite the lack of emphasis from my parents on schoolwork, I developed this sense of responsibility and persistence to pursue an education. Although my family’s Hispanic culture made my life difficult when I was younger, it made me a more resilient person.

More scholarship essay examples

Shpe scholarship essay example #2.

Discuss your educational and career aspirations as well as your ability to complete and achieve these goals. (250 words)

Using a degree in engineering, I hope to work on improving sustainability and efficiency in the aerospace industry by creating cheaper, safer, and more environmentally-conscious options.

Recently, Pratt and Whitney designed an engine that is 16% more efficient and will release 3600 less metric tons per airplane per year. Excitingly, it also greatly reduces the noise footprint of an airplane. Innovations like these will allow the aerospace industry to evolve and improve while reducing negative environmental impact. I hope to work at the forefront of this innovation, pushing the boundaries of improved engine performance and efficiency. 

Last semester, I started working in the Experimental and Computational Convection Laboratory on campus to learn more about turbines. Some current projects in the lab involve new turbine cooling techniques and additive manufactured heat exchangers. Throughout the course of my undergraduate career, I hope to learn more about the barriers facing improved engine and turbine efficiency. Following undergraduate, I plan to attend graduate school to gain a deeper knowledge of these topics. Following graduate school, I may go into industry working on turbines and jet engines. Due to beginning research early, I believe graduate school is an attainable educational goal.

The potential ability to make a difference in the environmental impact of the aerospace industry is exciting. To accomplish this, I know studying Mechanical Engineering will give me the skills necessary to fulfill my career goals.

Both of these scholarship essay examples use specific details to highlight the writer’s strengths, experiences, and accolades. In reading these winning scholarship essay examples, we get a sense of who the writer is both as a person and as a student. 

Scholarship Essay Sample about “Why I deserve the scholarship”

Another scholarship essay prompt you may come across is “why I deserve this scholarship.” A good scholarship essay clearly highlights why you deserve to win the scholarship and provides evidence to support your argument. 

Below, you’ll find scholarship essay samples about why I deserve the scholarship. You can use these as a guide to help you tackle your own scholarship essays. 

Here’s the first of our scholarship essay examples, which was used for the Park Scholarship: 

The Park Scholarship is an investment in the potential of young people. It prepares scholars to make lifelong contributions to communities, states, nations, and the world. Tell us a story that illustrates your potential to make these lifelong contributions. (What have you done that should compel us to invest in you?) (Max. 3,990 characters including spaces.)

Park scholarship essay example.

Coming from a Venezuelan family, I have always been able to connect with total strangers through Spanish. Whether I’m eating at a restaurant or volunteering, I am constantly stumbling upon other Spanish speakers. The ability to converse in their language allows me to bond with them in a way I couldn’t in English, something I do not take for granted. 

Because of my experience, I believe that learning a foreign language is an incredibly important skill. Being able to speak in a second language allows a person to understand another community and reach out to people within that community. Additionally, speaking a second language assists in appreciating other cultures. This appreciation is important for fostering open-mindedness, something America as a whole struggles with today. 

In my school district, foreign language classes are not offered until late middle school. Once in high school, many students drop the class. In addition, those who stay in the class often find that the classes provide little more than a basic understanding of the language and then become discouraged in their learning. On a larger scale, this issue affects America as a whole. Second language programs often come second in terms of funding and planning and are not encouraged as rigorously as other academic courses. As a result, many Americans are ignorant to the benefits of bilingualism and are unable to understand the viewpoint of those who are multilingual.

After my freshman year of high school, my frustration with my community’s lack of priority for second language learning culminated in my desire to take some sort of action to promote foreign language education. In my sophomore year, a classmate and I created and ran an introductory Spanish program, Spanish in the Spring, at my local library for young children in the district. I spent hours at home creating lesson plans, activities, themes, and advertisements for the program. I placed heavy emphasis on cultural aspects and the importance of the Spanish language in America and the world as a whole.

My purpose for this program was to introduce children at a young age to learning a foreign language, so their desire to learn would continue throughout their life. Through the program, I was also able to share my belief of the importance of learning a second language with the children, as well as their parents. After the final day of the program, I was thrilled when one parent mentioned their desire to learn a foreign language program themself. I felt that if I made an impact on one person or family, the entire program was worthwhile. 

Unfortunately, this past spring I was unable to continue the Spanish in the Spring program due to library scheduling restraints. However, I hopefully plan to offer the program again this spring with some changes that will improve and expand the experience. One of these changes will include the immersion of parents into the experience to encourage foreign language education as a family activity.

While this program was only offered once, the impact was immeasurable, for the children, for the cause of foreign language education, and for me.

This is another scholarship essay sample about why I deserve the scholarship. In it, the writer clearly and directly answers the prompt—that is, they highlight their potential to make a lifelong impact on members of their community. 

Ready for another scholarship essay example? Here’s the next one: 

How will a ScholarSHPE impact your life and education? (200 Words)

Shpe scholarship essay example.

Receiving a ScholarSHPE will give me the gift of time and opportunities. My parents are unable to support me financially throughout college due to large amounts of accrued debt. A ScholarSHPE will reduce my financial stress and allow me to improve my overall health as a result. It will also prevent the need to work several hours a week at a part-time job to pay for tuition, books, and living expenses, which will limit what I can do academically and outside of class. A ScholarSHPE will allow me to spend more time on research pursuits, engineering extracurriculars, volunteer work, and school work, instead of long hours at a part-time job. 

This essay sample is fairly straightforward. In it, the writer follows a clear scholarship essay format, explicitly answering the prompt. 

UC Berkeley Scholarships essay examples

Let’s look at some school-specific merit scholarship essay examples. 

At the University of California – Berkeley , students can apply for a variety of merit scholarships. These scholarships can help offset the cost of UC Berkeley tuition. 

Below, we’ve included various scholarship essay examples for the UC Berkeley scholarships. These UC Berkeley scholarships can help students cover their college tuition costs. This can make the UC Berkeley tuition less of a barrier for students hoping to attend. 

You’ll find a variety of UC Berkeley scholarships that can help you afford UC Berkeley tuition. Available UC Berkeley scholarships include: 

• Berkeley Undergraduate Scholarship
• Fiat Lux Scholarship
• Middle Class Scholarship
• Regents’ and Chancellor’s Scholarship

These are just a few ways to cover the cost of UC Berkeley tuition. UC Berkeley students also receive more than $10 million per year in outside scholarships to cover college tuition costs. If you are interested in exploring non-UC Berkeley scholarships, check out this list of outside scholarship resources . 

To help you get started, check out our winning UC Berkeley scholarship essay examples. The authors of these scholarship essay examples about financial need all won money to help cover their UC Berkeley tuition.

UC Berkeley scholarship essay examples

I am grateful to realize how fortunate I am today. All the loved ones around me and their acts of kindness have given me such a great life. I also realize the sacrifices that those around me have had to give up in order for me to succeed. It is because of this that I have realized what “paying it forward” truly means. I have been given the opportunity to make an impact in my community and I have fully taken advantage of this opportunity. I have been a volunteer for the Buddyball Sports Organization, which is a non-profit sports organization dedicated to providing the opportunity for children with developmental disabilities to play sports.

Growing up, watching and playing sports has been one of my greatest pleasures of life, so teaching these less fortunate kids has been something I have enjoyed doing every single weekend. On top of this, I am also both a volunteer at the South Orangetown Ambulance Corps and the Nyack Hospital. With the desire to pursue a career in the medical field, volunteering at these places has given me a great idea of what my career could look like in the near future. While all of these volunteer activities have had a significant impact on me, little did I know that this summer would truly make a lasting difference in my life. 

This past summer, my family decided to go on a vacation to India to visit my relatives. This was the first time in my life that I was going to India and this was only because my grandmother came down with Parkinson’s disease and was extremely sick. Little did I know at that time that my visit to India would be a life-changing experience. Never could have I imagined such a filthy village. Everywhere I looked, there was garbage and to make matters worse, no one seemed to do anything to try to ameliorate the repugnant image of my home country.

While I realized on my flight home that I was not going to be able to make a difference and help my community back in India, there was nothing stopping me from doing so right here in Rockland County, New York. When I was told that I would have the opportunity to help organize and direct “Make a Difference Rockland,” I joyfully accepted! Make a Difference Rockland is a free public meet and greet for all local non-profits and other government agencies in an attempt to promote different community service opportunities within the public. By gathering all the local non-profit organizations and giving them a chance to present themselves, people learn more about all of the local community service opportunities that are available to them. This way, the community will be able to recruit volunteers and will not have to suffer through calamitous conditions.

As one of the people in charge of organizing, it was my responsibility to adequately contact, invite and help prepare for hundreds of people. Once I gathered their contact information, I had to ask each one of these places if they would be interested in joining the fair. If interested, I had to also prepare a table for them to present themselves at the fair. The feeling of bringing all of these community service groups together brought me a feeling of happiness that I will never forget. 

The best scholarship essays will teach the reader about who the writer is, what they care about, and why they deserve a scholarship. The essay above does just that—it highlights the writer’s background and describes how they give back to their community. 

Next, let’s dig into a few more scholarship essay examples. 

If you’re interested in more descriptive essay examples, keep reading. 

Reading a ton of winning scholarship essay examples is a great way to pick up on what makes them winners. Over time, you’ll start to notice how the details, tone, and flow all work together to tell a story.

Below, you’ll find a few more scholarship essay examples. Our first one is from the NC Parks Scholarship. Here’s the prompt:

What do you do to serve your community? Why do you do the service that you do? What impact have you made? What challenges or insights have your service contributions given you? (Max. 3,990 characters including spaces.) 

Community-focused scholarship essay example #1.

“What are the boys like in high school?” “Is it easy to get a boyfriend?” Sighing, the other frustrated leaders and I look at each other as we read the questions posed by the younger girls. Every year at Girls’ Night Out (GNO), a program that introduces and prepares eighth-grade girls for high school, the girls question the leaders about relationships and dating ad nauseum, irritating other leaders to the point of ignoring the questions. 

Giving each question a careful and deliberate answer is often difficult, but instead of disregarding the issue, I try to offer my most sincere and honest advice. Originally, when I began as a group leader in the program I would give the same response, “You shouldn’t worry about boys. Instead, enjoy your friends, and do things you enjoy.” While that advice is true, it is often not the answer that will satisfy the girls. Through many years in the program, I have learned that advice is not “one size fits all”; it must be individualized to the person’s needs. Now, when faced with a question about dating, I respond with more questions before giving “words of wisdom”.

Many times I am able to understand the perspective of the middle school student, allowing me to give advice accordingly. Supplying proper advice about sensitive topics is one of the most impactful parts of GNO. As a role model and positive influence for the girls, I largely impact their ideas and perception of the environment when entering high school. In addition to teaching the students valuable lessons, volunteering at GNO has taught me that various perspectives may present themselves identically. To better understand those around me, it is important that I look beyond the surface for the other person’s viewpoint.

Beyond understanding other viewpoints from GNO, I have learned from other service that understanding a person’s situation is essential for providing exceptional assistance. Through Key Club, I volunteer many times a year at the local food pantry. As a volunteer, I help the recipients “shop” at the small grocery store using a point system. The process takes up a lot of time because shoppers do not always know what they want. Originally I  thought this was a poor design. I believed it would be much more efficient to just hand out the food rather than giving out points and shopping with the food pantry recipients.

Upon expressing my opinion to one of the adult food pantry staff, he explained to me that the grocery store aspect of the store taught the recipients life skills. Additionally, by giving them autonomy over what food they “bought”, they retained a sort of independence, an important skill to have if they find themselves above the income level required to use the food pantry.

The next time I volunteered I took note of the skills presented. Budgeting of points, deciding whether or not they needed something, determining the quality of the fruit, and decision-making of choosing extra food or toiletries, were all skills that those above the poverty line have ingrained. For those who have been using food pantries and other assistance for prolonged periods of time, these skills are not so natural. As a result, teaching the people means after they no longer need the services of the food pantry, they have valuable skills necessary for their independence.

From this experience, I learned an important lesson: helping people is not just giving them what they need at the moment, but understanding what they will need in the future and providing that as well. After realizing this, I emphasize the abilities that the food pantry teaches whenever I dedicate my time. By doing that, I am positively affecting the development of those skills. 

When reflecting on the various ways I have served my community, one thing stands out to me: I always understand another viewpoint or gain a new perspective afterwards. For me, the ability to look at something from different angles is an unparalleled talent, and one of the most important skills a person can have.

Describe your volunteer or community experience with SHPE or other organizations and any internships you have held.  (250 Words)

Community-focused scholarship essay example #2.

In SHPE, I have been involved in planning the Penn State College of Engineering STEP-UP (Student Transition Engineering Program at University Park) Program as a chair. The STEP-UP program helps students from Penn State branch campuses smoothly transition to the University Park campus through a 3-day program in the spring. The program introduces them to engineering resources, other engineering students, and provides professional development. Due to COVID-19, this year it was held virtually. 

Within the Society of Women Engineers and the Women in Engineering Program, I have volunteered at different STEM events in the community for elementary school students. I am also currently serving as an Envoy (a mentorship and logistical position) for the Women in Engineering Program Orientation. Additionally, I participate in many of SWE’s service events, such as donating and collecting donations, cleaning up areas on and around campus, and visiting nursing homes.

On campus, I am also involved with Engineering Ambassadors (EA), a group that does STEM outreach around Pennsylvania from the elementary school to high school level. EA goes virtually or in person to schools, does engineering presentations and activities, and answers questions.

Prior to COVID-19, I had secured an internship with Pratt and Whitney, however, they had to cancel their internship program. As a result, I was fortunate enough to obtain a Process Quality Engineering internship at Brentwood Industries for summer 2020.

Both of these scholarship essay examples highlight how the writers have given back to their communities. These winning scholarship essay examples highlight the writers’ strengths. In doing so, they highlight why these writers deserve help with college tuition costs. 

Reflecting on scholarship essay format

As important as the content of your essay is, your scholarship essay format is equally important. As you write, be sure to adhere to the scholarship essay format guidelines provided to you. 

However, there are some things all of the best scholarship essays have in common. Here are some general tips, tricks, and outlines to help you in your own writing process.

Three scholarship essay writing tips:

• Word counts are hard to adhere to, but the other applicants must adhere to them, too. Make sure every word counts. 
• When you write a solid essay, you can repurpose some of your key points, including specific anecdotes and details, in other scholarship applications.
• Writing a good essay helps you solidify who you are and what you want. This sets you up for success in the scholarship application process and beyond. 

Three essential elements to include in your essay:

• State your goals. Scholarship committees are investing in your future and your potential. To take a chance on you, they need to know your plan and what you want to do with your award. 
• Establish an implicit or explicit link between your goals and the scholarship you are applying for. Describe to the committee how the specific scholarship will help you attain your goals. Give them a tangible reason as to why you deserve their investment. 
• Share your story. Use personal details about your experiences that highlight your identity and objectives. How have you pursued your goals and prepared for your future? How will the scholarship help you going forward? Get personal and be honest.

Storytelling in your essay

Some of the best scholarship essays utilize good storytelling strategies. You should share the details of your personal story in a narrative, using a logical order. Remember, telling personal details about yourself and your goals does not mean simply restating your resume!

By the end of the essay, the scholarship committee should have an in-depth sense of why you applied. You should reveal:

• When and how you arrived at your future goals
• Your motivations to accomplish these objectives
• What traits or skills you have developed along the way
• The meaningful experiences that drive you to your goals
• Any personal challenges you have faced and how you have overcome them
• What has shaped you and your worldview

These details humanize you and show your complexity as a person and an applicant. It’s helpful to use anecdotes and personal experiences to give life to facts and details about yourself. Sharing real-life experiences will help make your essay more interesting and more fun to read.

Creating your scholarship essay format

Once you have thought about what you want to say, start thinking about your scholarship essay format. You may start by making a list of what your reader may be interested in:

• How you spend your time
• Your accomplishments
• What your passions are, etc.

Start by brainstorming everything you may want to include in your essay. Then, think about whether the stories you include support your arguments. Ask yourself, “What did I learn?” or “How did this get me closer to my goals?”. These reflections help the reader connect to your purpose for writing. 

Make sure to organize your thoughts in a narrative order. However, there isn’t just one way to write an essay. So, don’t limit yourself to one version of your story. You may find yourself writing multiple drafts before you get to your final scholarship essay format.

Editing and proofreading your essay

When you think you have finished, be sure to proofread and edit to ensure it’s ready to be submitted. Check that you’ve adhered to all the scholarship essay format guidelines (like the word count). 

Reviewing also includes getting input from others! An outside reader’s opinion can help you confirm your essay effectively communicates your ideas.

Tips for scholarship essays

You may notice some similarities between the scholarship essay examples about yourself we’ve provided. That’s because the authors of the best scholarship essays all use similar strategies to make their essays great. 

Here are 5 tips from U.S. News to help you make all of your scholarship essays stand out:

Tips for writing stand-out scholarship essays

1. get personal and be specific.

The best scholarship essays will share an authentic story with impactful details. The key is to be yourself and not shy away from personal details. The more the committee gets to know about you, the more likely they are to invest in your future. You want your essay to offer a genuine, in-depth look into who you are as a person.

2. Tell a story

Your essay should be more than a collection of facts—it should tell a story. That means having a solid introduction that grabs the reader’s attention from the very start. Then, you should include a logical flow of experiences or details. By the end of your essay, you want your reader to have learned something valuable about you.  

3. Tailor the scholarship essay to the prompt

Some of your scholarship essay prompts may be similar across different scholarship applications. However, it’s important that your essay is specific to each prompt and answers the question entirely. While you can repurpose an essay you’ve already written as inspiration or a starting point, be extra attentive when doing so.

4. Don’t tailor yourself to the reader

Many students fall into the trap of telling a story they think scholarship foundation committees want to hear. Instead, stay true to yourself as you craft your scholarship application essays. Don’t tell your reader what you think they want to hear—just tell them who you are. 

5. Follow directions

This final tip may arguably be the most important. Above all else, students should follow instructions. This means adhering to the scholarship essay format guidelines and word count. It also means answering the essay prompt in its entirety. Application readers can be easily frustrated by a student’s failure to follow directions. This could reflect poorly on you and your essay in the long run. 

Use these tips to guide you as you approach the scholarship essay format. 

Scholarship Essay Examples – Final Thoughts

We hope our roundup of scholarship essay examples has shown you how to approach your scholarship applications. With rising college costs, scholarships should be a part of your college financial planning process. Take the time to do your own scholarship search based on your specific interests. You can find plenty of scholarships to apply to on scholarships websites and college financial aid pages. There are many different scholarships websites to help you with your search. 

Save this guide

Feel free to save this guide and review our scholarship essay examples about yourself and about financial need. You can always look back on our scholarship essay sample about why I deserve the scholarship when writing your own essay. 

Start with an outline that organizes your thoughts. Then, make sure your essay is clear and concise. Be original and honest, and include personal details and anecdotes when appropriate. State why you deserve to win the scholarship. Then, support your claim in a way that makes a scholarship committee invested in your future. 

We’re here to help

Don’t forget to proofread your essay and ask others for their feedback. When in doubt, reach out to our advisors at CollegeAdvisor. Our team is always here to help support you find and apply for scholarships!

This article was written by Bailey Bennet. Looking for more admissions support? Click here to schedule a free meeting with one of our Admissions Specialists. During your meeting, our team will discuss your profile and help you find targeted ways to increase your admissions odds at top schools. We’ll also answer any questions and discuss how CollegeAdvisor.com can support you in the college application process.

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How to Write a Scholarship Essay

• Post date January 20, 2021

Set Yourself Up for Success

When you’re competing against thousands of scholarship applicants, your personal statement for a scholarship can make or break your chances of winning. While filling out your application is pretty straightforward, your essay is what will make you stand out.

The problem is, without knowing where to start, most students will head over to Google and search for things like:

• scholarship essay examples
• sample scholarship essays
• personal statement for scholarship examples
• scholarship essay examples financial need
• scholarship letter sample
• scholarship letter examples

With thousands of students using the same examples as references, your essays will start to look and sound alike, making it harder to make an impression. However, with a properly constructed and thoughtful essay, you can separate yourself from the student body of college hopefuls, giving you a great chance at securing the resources necessary for higher education.

That said, you’re probably wondering how to write a scholarship essay that’s capable of winning awards and accolades? We’re here to help you apply by sharing our must-know scholarship essay tips that will ensure you the best shot at winning.

The Question

The key to how to write a scholarship essay that’s going to stand out falls to the questions you address. When going through scholarship essay questions, you might come across a bunch of different questions specific to what the scholarship committee is looking for from their future winner. However, the underlying question for almost every scholarship essay is the same, regardless of how it’s worded. Most essays will ask, “Why do you deserve to win?” or some iteration of that using different wording. They might ask to “describe your extracurricular passions” or “describe a time when you had to take on a leadership role,” but believe it or not, all these seemingly different questions are looking to hear why you deserve the scholarship money.

How you choose to answer is up to you, but you must address this underlying question and tie it back to your answer to the overarching essay question. On another note, if you haven’t already figured this out, the answer should never be “because I need money.”

6 Steps to Writing an Award-Winning Scholarship Essay

First and foremost, before we provide our tips on how to write a scholarship essay, you need to know the purpose of the scholarships you are applying to and use this as your guide when writing a scholarship essay. Keep in mind that when writing about why you deserve to win, the answer you choose, along with examples that you use, should show how you fulfill the scholarship’s mission. Knowing this, here are our six steps to writing an award winning scholarship essay:

Step 1 — The Right Topic & Approach

Generally, you will come across two types of essay questions: the first will ask you to write about a specific topic, and the second will give you a broad topic to write about. With the first type, you need to create your own topic, and in the latter, you don’t need to think about a topic as it is provided for you. However, you will need to develop an appropriate approach to answer both types of questions.

Finding a Topic

When you’re presented with a broad essay question, you can choose your own topic. As such, you’ll need to generate ideas and start brainstorming. Begin by thinking about significant events in your life, people who have influenced you, learning experiences from your time at school, goals, and future ambitions, where you hope you’ll be in the next five or ten years etc. Don’t get too critical while you’re brainstorming; just let your creativity flow. Once you’ve created a list of topics, start to eliminate the ones that don’t help you answer why you deserve to win and narrow down your topics to the one you feel will best suit the question.

Developing a Unique Approach

Whether you had to come up with your own topic or one was provided to you, you will need to figure out how you will approach it. For any given topic, there are probably a hundred ways you could tackle the subject. You’re going to have to narrow down your topic by choosing to share a small part of the larger story that best answers the question.

Once you’ve narrowed down your topic, it’s time to consider what approach will convince the scholarship committee that you deserve to win the money above other applicants. Keep in mind, simply retelling the story won’t tell the reader how this experience reveals the qualities they are looking for. Get creative and dig deeper by asking yourself: How has this experience changed your life? Why did you do what you did? What is the lesson that came out of this experience? What aspect of this topic is most important to making my point? From there, you need to decide on the focus of your essay since you will be speaking to a small sliver of time.

Finding the right approach is just as important as finding the right topic. This is especially true if you answer a question that provides a specific topic. With every scholarship applicant writing about the same topic, you need to be sure that your approach persuasively shows the judges why you deserve to win more than anyone else.

Step 2 — Be Original

Now that you know what you’re going to write about and how you’re going to approach your topic, it’s time to figure out how you’re going to convey your message. Keep in mind that scholarship committees will read hundreds, if not thousands, of essays that will often be on the same or a similar topic. This is why it is essential to make sure your writing is original and engaging.

To do this, you’ll need to share a moment in your life that will help you convey your point. By doing this, you’re reducing your chances of having an essay that sounds like everyone else’s since your experiences are unique to you. Essays that share a unique moment from your life tend to be a lot more interesting and leave a lasting impression while giving the scholarship committee a better picture of who you are.

You don’t have to look far to find originality. Everyone has experiences that are unique to us. Even the most common experiences can be made original, depending on how you illustrate and tell the story, so don’t write off a topic just because it sounds ordinary. Take the time to think about how you can write about it in a way that is different from others, and you may surprise yourself at how original it could be.

Step 3 — Go with Your Flow

We all know the most challenging part of writing is getting started. Don’t overthink it; just start writing what is going through your head. The first few sentences aren’t going to be the best, but get your thoughts onto paper and worry about the rest later. You can always go back and revise it to sound better, but it’s easier to do once you have all your thoughts down.

While everyone has their own writing style, the most important thing to focus on when writing is winning over a scholarship committee. You need to think about who will read your essay, so you might want to do additional research. Your goal is to write an essay that appeals to your audience. This should guide not only your selection of topics but also your word choice, language, and tone.

The key is to be yourself. While you want to present yourself in a way that attracts the attention of the scholarship committee, you don’t want to portray yourself as someone you are not. It’s fine to present selected highlights from your life that fit with the award, but it’s not ethical to exaggerate or even outright lie about an experience to win an award. Don’t go crazy trying to mold yourself into a person you think the scholarship committee wants to read about.

Be true to yourself and write about what has happened to you personally or how you have been affected by something directly in your life. Given that most essays will have a character or word limit, keep your essay tight and focused. Lastly, don’t forget to make your point!

Step 4 — Stand Out From Start to Finish

Everyone knows that the hardest part of an essay is the introduction and conclusion. While this may be true, it’s also the two most important parts of your essay. Your introduction gives the reader their first impression of you, while the conclusion should leave a lasting impact. Spend extra time on your introduction and conclusion to ensure these two parts deliver the message you want.

The goal of your introduction is to captivate the reader’s attention. Considering posing a new question — questions often grab the reader’s attention because it will make them stop to think about how they would answer the question and are curious to see how you will answer or present a solution to the question in your essay.

As you introduce the topic, don’t forget the power of description. If you can create a vivid image for the reader, they’ll be more inclined to continue reading. Paint a picture for the reader with senses and words so they can envision themselves there.

The purpose of your conclusion is to thoughtfully bring your essay to an end. The conclusion is the second most powerful statement in your essay because this is what the scholarship committee will remember. With the hopes that the scholarship committee has thoroughly read your essay, avoid summarizing your essay in the conclusion. While it’s okay to include one sentence rehashing what you’ve already said, you want to do more than just restate your point. You have one final opportunity to make a lasting impression, so add a parting thought. This can be one last observation or idea that ties into the main point you’re trying to make. The worst thing you could do is tack on a meaningless conclusion filled with fluff, so be sure every sentence has a purpose. Lastly, never start your paragraph with “in conclusion,” and never end your essay with the words “The End.”

Step 5 — Get Some Extra Eyes On It

Despite how well you think you write, you’re not infallible, so it’s important to get someone else to proofread and edit your work. Whether it’s friends, roommates, family members, teachers, or advisors, ask someone other than yourself to look over your work. One of the key benefits of having someone else read your work is that they will find errors that eluded you, and they will be able to identify spots in your essay that seem unclear from an outsider’s perspective.

Make sure your reviewers know what to look for. Ask them if your ideas are clear, if you have answered the question appropriately, and if your essay is interesting. While you may disagree with some of their feedback and suggestions, take them seriously, and consider what they are telling you. The more input you get from others, the more times you’ll find yourself revising it to be better.

Your main goal is to produce an essay with clear points and supporting examples that logically flow together to prove your overall point. You also want to make sure that your essay has no spelling and grammar errors. The best way to do this is to have someone else read your work. If you don’t have someone you can ask or are limited due to time, then do it yourself. But, do it ever so carefully.

Step 6 — Repurpose Your Essays!

Keep in mind you’ll be applying to more than one scholarship, and since most scholarship committees usually ask very broad questions, you should repurpose your essays. Doing this could save you a tremendous amount of time. If you choose to reuse your essay, make sure you go through all the steps of figuring out who your audience is and what the topic is. If your existing essay can effectively answer another topic, be sure to tailor it for every scholarship application. However, be mindful of when a repurposed essay doesn’t fit the question. It’s better to take your time to write an appropriate essay than to submit one that doesn’t make sense for a specific scholarship.

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How to Write Winning Scholarship Essays

Scholarships & Financial Aid

Updated on November 24th, 2021

The vast majority of legitimate and reputable scholarships are going to require an essay as part of the application process, which means your student needs to know how to write winning scholarship essays. Otherwise, they may miss out on exciting opportunities for free money to help pay for college, increasing the odds that they’ll need student loans to make ends meet.

While “no essay” scholarships do exist, most of these are no more than sweepstakes, and some of them are incredibly sketchy. If you want to know more about no-essay scholarships, check out this article: What You Need to Know About No Essay Scholarships

Writing winning scholarship essays isn’t as challenging as it sounds, as long as your student knows the best approach. To help them get started, here is an in-depth guide on how to write a scholarship essay that will grab the attention of the committee for all of the right reasons.

If you and your student would like to learn more about  how to find scholarships  that can help pay for college, sign up for our  free college scholarship webinar ! We cover how to spot the scams so you can make sure your student is applying to scholarships that are actually worth their time. Join the next free training here:  www.thescholarshipsystem.com/freewebinar.

• 1 Read All of the Instructions to Write Winning Scholarship Essays
• 2 Define the Audience for the Scholarship Essay
• 3 Brainstorm Before Writing Scholarship Essays
• 4 Choose the Right Topic to Cover
• 5.1 Writing the Scholarship Essay First Draft
• 5.2 Refining First Drafts into Winning Scholarship Essays
• 6 Get an Outside Opinion
• 7 Finalize and Submit the Essay

Read All of the Instructions to Write Winning Scholarship Essays

While this may seem like common sense, many students rush through the instructions section before they start writing their scholarship essay. Why? Because reading instructions isn’t fun and many students are fairly pressed for time.

Ultimately, winning scholarship essays always adhere to the instructions. If your student misses a requirement, their essay may be automatically discarded, meaning they spent all of that time writing for no gain.

Have your student examine the instructions to look for details that outline the process including these:

• The topic they must cover
• Formatting requirements
• Sourcing requirements

Only after this step is complete should they move forward.

Define the Audience for the Scholarship Essay

The audience of a scholarship essay is whoever will be reading it, and catering the content to those groups of people helps create winning scholarship essays.

While you likely won’t know exactly who is going to review their essay, they can infer a lot of information based on the organization or business that is providing the funds. For example, if your student can discuss a topic that relates to a company’s products, services, values, or mission, it may be easier to connect with the reader on a meaningful level.

Typically, you can figure out the audience’s priorities by reviewing the organization’s website. Read through the product or service descriptions, About Us section, as well as any mission statements to get insight into the group’s values.

Brainstorm Before Writing Scholarship Essays

In many cases, scholarship essay topics give your student a lot of leeway regarding what they can write. In fact, they may be able to choose from multiple prompts, something that may make it harder to figure out what winning scholarship essays for this organization entail.

When writing a great scholarship essay, brainstorming is an important part of the process. They should grab a sheet of paper, list every topic or prompt, and jot down notes of examples that apply to each one. With our students in The Scholarship System , we teach them mind-mapping for this step, a powerful tool to uncover creative essay ideas.

Usually, brainstorming only takes a few minutes, but it can make a world of difference when writing winning scholarship essays. It allows them to organize their thoughts and identify ideas that excite them.

Choose the Right Topic to Cover

After your student brainstorms, they should focus on topics that ignite their passion. If they are excited about the idea, it’s often easier to write about it. Plus, their enthusiasm will shine through.

Review the list of ideas and choose an option that peaks interest and fits the prompt. This makes writing winning scholarship essays feel like less of a burden, which can go a long way when your student wants to apply to a long list of scholarships.

Some key aspects to look for when selecting a topic include:

• One that speaks to core values
• Why the investment (the scholarship) is worth it
• How it led them to their degree choice or career path

Ideally, the topic should relate back to at least one of the points above, creating a connection between the content of the scholarship essay and your student’s future.

Structuring Winning Scholarship Essays

Winning scholarship essays are always well-structured, so creating an outline is a smart move. Most high school students are familiar with essay outlines, so your student should be able to handle this with relative ease.

Scholarship Essay Introduction

Begin by structuring the introduction. Usually, your student will want to have an attention-grabbing first sentence followed by a short explanation of what will be discussed and a thesis statement that directly addresses the prompt. Students can get creative here but any story, question, or attention-grabbing beginning should clearly tie into the rest of the essay and of course, relate to the prompt.

Scholarship Essay Body

Ideally, each body paragraph should discuss a single point that relates to the topic, usually in a few sentences. If possible, it’s a great idea to make the point through a mini-story or example. This keeps the essay interesting for the reader and helps them understand the writer even better. For example, rather than saying “I initially decided I wanted to be a lawyer in 9 th grade…,” a student can instead share a quick story or example and sum it up with “That is when I first discovered my passion for law.”

Transitions

Having quality transitions between paragraphs is also essential as it improves the flow of the essay. To structure this portion, your student can write each point they want to cover and arrange them in an order that promotes readability and logical segues.

Scholarship Essay Conclusion

The conclusion should wrap everything up by reemphasizing how the prompt was addressed, discussing lessons learned, and even speaking to the core values of the audience. Depending on the essay prompt, students can stress how this essay shows they are a great candidate for the scholarship. Again, a few sentences will usually suffice.

After writing the outline, review it to make sure that it adheres to every requirement in the instructions and that every component provides value to the reader. Remember, winning scholarship essays always meet the requirements, so it’s wise to review this before the writing phase begins.

Related articles:

• 8 Best Websites to Find College Scholarships
• How to Win Scholarships with the Right Scholarship Essay Format
• How to Find Local Scholarships for Your Teen’s College Education

Writing the Scholarship Essay First Draft

With the outline in hand, your student now has a guide for writing a high-quality first draft of their scholarship essay. How they decide to approach this phase may depend on their personal style.

Some students like to begin with the introduction, move through the body, and then create a conclusion. However, others may prefer to write the body first and then craft the introduction and conclusion after. Both approaches are perfectly acceptable as long as the final paper flows logically.

First drafts are allowed to be rough, so it’s fine if your student just lets their ideas run rampant while they create. Let their passion guide them as they get their thoughts down on paper.

It’s also okay to ignore spelling or grammar errors as they write as these can be cleaned up during editing. Writing the first draft is more about getting all of their ideas on paper than anything else, so a degree of sloppiness isn’t inherently a problem.

Refining First Drafts into Winning Scholarship Essays

Once everything is written, now is the time to refine the content. First, your student should correct any mechanical issues, like spelling or grammar mistakes. There are a variety of tools that can help them do that, but it’s also important to not rely on technology entirely.

A great approach for finding errors is to read the essay out loud. This allows your student to potentially hear problems, which can be easier than spotting them with their eyes. In some cases, using a text-to-speech program can work too, allowing your student to listen for issues.

In the vast majority of cases, winning scholarship essays are error-free, so finding mistakes and correcting them is critical for your student’s success.

Once the errors are corrected, the draft can be reviewed for flow. Ideally, each paragraph should shift naturally into the next, following a logical thought pattern or progression through an event. If a transition feels awkward or a detail feels out of place or unnecessary, then edits should be made.

After that is complete, your student should recheck it a final time to ensure that all of the requirements set forth in the instructions are met. This includes everything from properly covering the topic to meeting word count minimums and not going over maximums. Similarly, they should take a look at the formatting to make sure they used the proper font and size, margins, spacing, and anything else listed in the instructions.

Related Video:

• 7 College Scholarship Essay Ideas to Win More Funding

Get an Outside Opinion

After the draft is refined, it could be time to get a second opinion. Often, it will be difficult for your student to review their essay objectively, so having someone else take a look is smart.

Who they choose is up to them, but some options worth exploring include trusted teachers and tutors. Parents can also make a good choice if their writing skills are strong, but some students won’t be comfortable with their parents reading what they wrote, depending on the topic. In those cases, selecting someone else is a better option than trying to force the issue.

Finalize and Submit the Essay

After the essay is reviewed by someone else, your student should make any final edits based on the feedback they receive. Then, once it is ready, it’s time to submit the scholarship application and essay for consideration.

By following the steps above, your student can increase their odds of writing winning scholarship essays that help them find free money for college. After they use the process a few times, it will likely begin to feel like second nature, making each essay easier to complete than the last.

Want even more help on writing scholarship essays? Grab a copy of our Free 3-Step Scholarship Essay Writing Guide where you learn the exact 3 steps we teach our students. This 3-Step Method helps even those students who hate writing!

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January 31, 2019 at 7:42 am

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I love the article on writing a winning essay, the problem most persons face is the Essay Introduction. One of the best ways to present your introduction is to get the attention of your reader with something interesting, unique, fact or ask a question.

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January 28, 2020 at 6:56 am

A scholarship essay is all about highlighting what you are as a student and this post will make it easy for students to write their scholarship essays in a clear step-by-step way. Getting a second opinion on the essay draft is a really useful tip and is a must-do before submitting a noteworthy scholarship essay!

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September 20, 2020 at 10:21 am

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July 23, 2021 at 10:33 pm

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November 9, 2021 at 7:07 am

Scholarship essay is an integral part of your application

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August 14, 2023 at 6:28 am

I liked and thought your blog exercise was exciting. Please keep giving us excellent and outstanding blog posts. At some point in a student’s life, he/she would need to write a Scholarship Essay, this essay can be for various purposes such as commencing a college program or funding research. Hence, this piece can either hinder or help students achieve their academic goals. Please read the post I made to my blog, It might be helpful to you in any way.

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How to Write a College Scholarship Essay: A Guide With Examples

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A scholarship essay is a type of admission writing that aims to convince a scholarship committee or foundation that a student is a worthy recipient of financial aid. The purpose of a scholarship essay is to demonstrate a student's academic excellence, leadership abilities, community involvement, and financial need (if applicable).

Writing an outstanding scholarship essay is a key factor in winning yourself a grant application. This will also secure your financial positions. In this article we will talk about key elements of an essay for your scholarship. Clear step-by-step guide on how to write one will be provided as well. We will also answer some popular questions. Hopefully this information from our scholarship essay writing service will help you succeed with an application. Let us get into it together!  

How to Write a Good Scholarship Essay: Essential Steps

Sometimes you need a little push, some good  scholarship  essay tips. After all, this work is important for an application to be accepted. Better make it a good one, right? That is why you must tell a compelling story, provide original ideas and persuasive arguments so the reader agrees with you. Sounds challenging? No worries, we have collected a few tips for you. Several examples and templates will be provided below as well. Stay with us and you will find some information that will help you do your best when writing this piece of writing. Wonder if it is different from a college essay ? Yes, it is completely another assignment.

Step 1. Examine the Application Requirements Before Writing a Scholarship Essay

Before starting to write an essay for college scholarship , it is useful that you check out all requirements for the application. Pay attention to the details and find out whether you meet all of them, e.g:

• Grades received for specific courses of GPA during the whole time of studying.
• Participation in certain activities, such as athletics.
• Your family’s financial status, etc.

Analyze the requirements first and then decide whether you are going to make the application. If yes, proceed with writing.

Step 2. Create a Strong Scholarship Essay Outline

Starting with an outline is a sure-fire way to build an excellent and logical structure of your story. Here is how you write scholarship essay outline:

• In the beginning, organize your thoughts and write down the main thesis.
• Put all the main points organized as sections and subsections in the middle. Add just a few words per each point, no need in writing full sentences.
• A brief conclusion should be made at the end.

Review an outline so you can detect any inconsistencies or logical gaps. Make corrections. Once done, proceed with the full text. Look at different essay outline examples for a better understanding.

Step 3. Be Clear and Concise in Your Scholarship Essay

This scholarship essay should demonstrate your writing skills and experience. At the same time, it must be quite readable and understandable. Describe all details in a straightforward manner and don’t create an overly complicated structure. Be brief, don't include any irrelevant facts or ideas but, on the other hand, don’t skip any important details. Make your writing sound professional, maintain a respectful tone and avoid using any profane language or slang.

Step 4. Create Strong Start for your Scholarship Essay

This is how to start a scholarship essay:

• Begin with a strong introduction to hook an audience. Try a surprising first line to make them curious.
• Make it relevant to the assignment. Give an audience a quick preview of what they can expect from an assignment. Show that you follow the required topic.
• Explain that all the questions provoked by your start would be answered later in text. Make sure there is a logical transition to the main part.

Step 5. Make a Clear Body for Your Scholarship Essay

Aim to maintain a good and logical structure while writing a scholarship essay. Follow an outline and stick to the plan. It is important to make sure that the reader can follow your narrative without too much effort. When creating a body for your essay, you should:  

• Split your body paragraph into several parts. This way you can explain your main idea more thoroughly.
• Tell about your personal experience. Share your hobbies and interests. Explain what makes you attend college and why you need the scholarship.

Add evidence and quotes supporting an opinion. Again, don’t give too much detail otherwise your reader could get tired. Don’t forget about proper formatting, citation and grammar.

Step 6. Summarize Your Scholarship Essay Conclusion

A good conclusion makes your ideas clearer for the reader. This is how to end a scholarship essay:

• Ensure that all questions from the introduction get answered.
• Show some progress and highlight the effort made to find these answers.
• Make assumptions about future, the meaning of your story and its possible outcomes.
• Write a clear closing sentence in the end.
• Keep it short.
• Express gratitude to the committee for taking their time to review this essay.

Step 7. Proofread and Edit Your Scholarship Essay

Quality of text is crucial! You are not likely to win a scholarship with essay that has grammar mistakes, missing words or inconsistent formatting. While making a plan, consider leaving some time for reviewing and editing your work after you complete it. Good idea will be asking your family member or friend to proofread it for you. Another way to find mistakes or logical gaps is to read an assignment out loud: your ear can spot something an eye didn’t catch.

Scholarship Essay Format: Basic Rules of Use

First, check provided guidelines on how to format scholarship essay. If there are none, just follow standard professional style and format. Make sure your writing piece is complete and easy for understanding. Use one of the popular format styles: APA paper format , MLA, or Chicago style essay . Save it as a .pdf file to keep the formatting.

Scholarship Essay Template: The Best and Full

Here's a scholarship essay template that you can use to write your own piece. Use the following structure but stand by your own plan:

• Tell about yourself, making a ‘hook’
• Mention the grant you are applying for
• Tell about yourself, give examples of your personal traits and interests
• Describe your situation. Put the focus on how you overcome your challenges
• Mention your major and explain why you have selected it
• Talk about your future goals
• Highlight your relevant experience including research, work or volunteering
• Explain why you need this grant
• Explain how it will help you
• Restate your main idea
• Talk about the positive impact you could make after receiving the scholarship
• Express gratitude to the committee.

Free Scholarship Essay Examples

Do you need real scholarship essay example that was written for a specific college? We’ve got a few ones for you! Feel free to check these samples out and see if they can bring you some fresh ideas or an inspiration to pursue your goals. Scroll down to access all available examples.

Scholarship Essay Examples About Yourself

This is an example of scholarship essay about yourself. Self-reflection and analysis is an important element of education. You can speak about the challenges you meet when you study and about the ways to overcome them. Show some emotions when appropriate but make sure to include only relevant details.

Scholarship Essay Sample About Why I Deserve the Scholarship

Are you looking for a scholarship essay about why I deserve the scholarship ? This is naturally the first idea that comes to mind in such situation. In fact, students are typically expected to explain their needs and why they have made an application. This way you can show your level by displaying strong arguments and logic. Let’s start!

Scholarship Essay Examples About Career Goals

Finally, here is an example of a scholarship essay about career goals. It might be easy for you to write persuasive text based on your hopes and plans on finding your own path in this world. Just keep in mind that such assignments require serious work on the outline to make them well-structured and suitable for scholarship applications.

Scholarship Essays: Final Thoughts

In this article, we have provided you with basic information about the scholarship essay: its purpose, its general structure and tips on how to start and how to complete a proper one. Keep this information in mind when writing your piece. Plan it thoroughly, use your skills and experience and follow our guidelines. A well-written academic work could ensure the success of an application!

Rely on our essay writer website and have your essay done specially for you!  

Frequently Asked Questions About Scholarship Essay

1. how do you write a 500-word scholarship essay.

When writing a 500-word scholarship essay, the most important part is making proper structure and following a good plan. Here are the recommended steps:

• Create a thesis.
• Write the introduction.
• Write the body paragraphs.
• Wrap it up with conclusion.

After completing your text you can add more details or remove unnecessary ones.

2. How many paragraphs should a scholarship essay have?

Typically, there are no strict requirements regarding scholarship essay paragraphs. In general, an assignment should consist of 3 or more paragraphs. Their quantity is defined by your plan and structure of an outline. Just make sure you have formatted it properly and added all necessary details.

3. How long should a scholarship essay be?

Brevity is very important when it comes to scholarship applications. In most cases, scholarship essay should be kept to 500 words or less. Try to plan beforehand to include your descriptions, arguments and explanations into this volume. If you have doubts, ask your peers or mentor for advice.

4. What is the difference between a scholarship essay and a college essay?

The differences between a scholarship essay and college essay:

• Purpose: you can write about your personality in an assignment for college. Grant application should focus on your goals which can be fulfilled by getting the grant.
• Length: up to 500 words for grant essay and up to 650 words for college essay.
• Approach: when applying for grant, speak about contribution you could make. A written piece for college can focus on your personal reflection from entering new community.
• Prompt: it can be broad for a paper for college. An application for grant must focus on your needs, goals and positive impact you can make.

Rachel R. Hill is a real educational devotee. She prides in writing exceptional general guides while listening to every need of students.

How to Write a Scholarship Essay?

31 July, 2020

15 minutes read

Author:  Elizabeth Brown

College years are a beautiful season. That being said, we have to admit that it is also quite pricey. Young people spend long hours working part-time during college and full-time after the graduation just to get out of the student loans. However, there is a bright side to all this...

A high-quality scholarship essay can keep your pockets full. The truth is that you have a chance to qualify for financial aid from your college. And all it takes is an essay for scholarship crafted in accordance with the college’s requirements.

Already wondering how to get an essay that will help you grab a piece of that multi-billion scholarship pie?   Handmade Writing has it all covered!

Not only we’ve gathered several scholarship essay examples but also created a list of scholarship essay format styles that will make the writing much easier and way more fun.

So, let’s get this show on the road!

Scholarship Essay Outlines

Like any other piece of academic writing, this paper requires a specific structure and outline. They help you keep your thoughts organized while walking the reader step by step through your paper.

Don’t view outlines as a boring routine part of the job. When done correctly, it can take your writing to a new level!

Related Post: Essay outline guide

Typically, a scholarship essay consists of three main parts: an introduction, main body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each one of these parts has its own purpose and value. Thus, none should be ignored or underrated.

An Introduction.

When working on an introductory paragraph to your scholarship essay, consider three of its main parts: a hook, a thesis statement, and an engaging sentence to grab readers’ attention. The thesis statement for scholarship essay writing is at the core of a successful piece. It helps the audience understand what this text will focus on and how relevant it is to the main idea of your paper. It is in your best interest to make it as exciting as possible. If you want to find out more on how to craft a quality thesis statement, check our  thesis statement guide .

Main Body Paragraphs.

Each main body paragraph should begin with an argument that supports the thesis. Next comes the evidence that backs up the author’s position. And last but not least is a conclusion that briefly summarizes this paragraph’s main idea.

A Conclusion.

Even though it stands at the end of your piece, a conclusion plays a vital role in the overall success of a scholarship essay. It might be the only thing readers remember in the long run. So, you’d better make it memorable. Remind the audience of reasons to choose you a winner of their scholarship essay contests and promise they won’t regret it.

Remember that you don’t have to write too many details in an outline. Your only goal at this stage is to create a certain structure you will stick to while writing. Throw more ideas later on, while brainstorming or developing the first draft.

Now, let’s look at each part of an outline closer. We’ll show you tips for writing scholarship essays in practice.

By the way, check out our  process essay guide  to learn how to craft the best process papers ever!

How to Start off a Scholarship Essay?

If you don’t know how to start a scholarship essay, here is our first tip: identify the main idea of your essay. Here is what we mean.

Read the scholarship essay prompts carefully, preferably several times. Make sure you understand what exactly the admissions board wants you to focus on.

If there are no prompts, brainstorm answers to the following questions:

• What makes me a perfect candidate for this scholarship?
• Why should the college help me financially?
• What achievements should I talk about when requesting the scholarship from this college?

These answers will help you find the best way to start a scholarship essay. They will guide you. So, open your essay with an answer to these questions. Present it in the thesis statement and move on to the next part.

Main Body Paragraphs

Now comes the time to learn how to write a personal statement essay for scholarships. Once you introduce the audience to the purpose of your essay, start the presentation the main point of which lies in creating a personal statement.

Depending on the size of your essay, you might split this part into several paragraphs . Each of them can have a headline and a short paragraph explaining it.

One of the worthy personal statement for scholarship sample essays we want to introduce you to is by University of Minnesota. It has everything a good scholarship application essay needs: a personal perspective, an engaging introduction, the clear structure, answers to the questions mentioned above , etc. So, give it a read and use the author’s example to apply to your writing.

To put it short, every paragraph should start with an argument that supports the thesis statement you talked about in an introduction. Next comes the evidence for the argument. In the case of this type of writing, it should base on your personal experience, achievements or aspirations. Finally, wrap up with a short conclusion to each individual paragraph.

How to End Your Essay?

All good scholarship essays follow this structure. Now that you are working on a conclusion remember that it might be the only thing the admissions board members will remember after finishing your piece. So, you’d better make it memorable.

Proper college scholarship essay conclusions restate the thesis statement and all the arguments you used to support your position. Don’t make it too long. Just remind the board of what you were talking about above and move on to call them to action . In your case, an action you want to call them too is giving you the scholarship. Don’t sound pushy, yet don’t hesitate to remind about your request in the end.

Here is what the  University of Minnesota presented on their website as a good conclusion to a paper. It’s written by a determined single mother willing to study at their university. And it goes as follows:

“As a single parent with inconsistent child support, the Carol E. Macpherson scholarship would be of great assistance in supporting my goal to finish my degree. I work 25 hours a week and have chosen not to work full‐time to avoid daycare costs and to be there to provide guidance for my children after school. The Carol E. Macpherson Scholarship provides a chance for people who are struggling to return to school, to become the exception and succeed. I hope to become one of those special people.”

It sounds convincing and goes along with the overall message . We definitely recommend reading this scholarship essay and learning from it.

Scholarship Essay Examples

Now, we understand that learning the theory is important. But seeing real-life examples is a better way to learn.

That is why we’ve gathered a list of good scholarship essays  we’re sure you will find useful too.

There might be several ways on how to write a good scholarship essay. It all starts with winning scholarship essay topics.   

“Why I deserve this scholarship” essay mainly focuses on your strengths. Your goal here is to present your strengths so that the admissions board understands how hard-working you are and how valuable your input into college life is. Thus, brainstorm ideas on how you make this college a better place or what you have done or want to do to strengthen the image of a particular educational establishment.

Here is one of amazing  college scholarship essay examples  presented by the San Diego State University.

“As an undergraduate student, I dedicated my best efforts toward my education, and as a result, I graduated with high honors from the University of California, Santa Barbara earning a B.A. in Communications. I soon attained full-time employment with the San Diego Center for Children, a residential treatment program for children with severe emotional disturbances. My main responsibilities are to aid children in learning and carrying out daily living skills, counsel them in their relations with peers and adults, serve as a responsible role model, and to work closely with other members of the treatment team, such as therapists and social workers implementing the Center’s programs.”

Here the author mentions what he is currently doing well and what makes him a #1 candidate for the scholarship. He is currently working hard in this area aiming to make a difference in the lives of people that need it the most. These are our “Why I deserve this scholarship” essay tips. But this is not the only topic you can opt for.

“How will this scholarship help you achieve your goals” essay is completely different at its core. This written piece should focus on how your college can help you achieve your personal or career goals. Even though here you should talk about your strengths and aspirations too, you should mainly focus on ways this particular educational establishment can help you.

The University of Michigan-Flint has offered the following example on their site.

“My life has been a struggle at times, but my hard work, determination, and enthusiasm for my education and my community has brought to UM Flint where I can pursue my dreams. I am the oldest of four children being raised by a single parent. My mother, Charlene Jackson, is a hardworking woman who struggles to keep food on the table; I work two jobs to help support my family, but we barely scrape by. Because my mom is endeavoring through these hard times, I try my best to keep my grades up, knowing that I have opportunities that my mother never had.”

The message is short and to the point. The author is an A-grade student who wants to obtain a degree but doesn’t have enough funds for it. In his case, the university can help him a lot.

You can also craft a study abroad scholarship essay. In it, you must explain why y ou deserve to get a scholarship to study abroad. While most students want to go abroad just to travel, this is not a good enough reason for the admissions board to pick you. Instead, you should do a background check on the educational establishment, curriculum, and extracurricular activities offered by the college and explain why you so desperately want to be a part of them.

“I am an undergraduate student of the ABC University. My major is English Literature with the focus on the Victorian and Post-colonialism authors. With literature being my passion, I am overwhelmed with an opportunity to participate at XYZ program. From the curriculum, I know that a significant part of our time at college will be dedicated to ABC, and I’m sure it’ll be not only a great experience but also a fantastic investment into my future career. I am hoping to write a dissertation after attending this program. That is why I am applying for the scholarship.”

Finally, there is another thing you cannot afford missing your essay to get a scholarship. This thing is a proper scholarship essay format.

Related Post: Argumentative essay topics

How to Format a Scholarship Essay?

If the format style is not specified by the university, opt for these scholarship essay guidelines:

However, often the choice of the format for your essay depends on the university you apply for. Check out the requirements posted by the admissions board to make sure you are applying proper formatting.

Four most common formats for such an essay are  APA, MLA, Chicago, and Harvard format styles. To learn more about each of these format styles for a scholarship essay, check out our  essay format guide .

Scholarship Essay Tips

Keep these tips to writing a scholarship essay in mind when working on your piece:

• Focus on your own experience. This essay should explain what makes you stand out from other applicants and why this particular scholarship should be yours.
• Keep it short. Eliminate unnecessary details not answering the question of why choose you.
• Use proper structure. The structure can keep you organized. So, don’t underestimate its importance.
• Edit and proofread your essay. There is nothing like poor grammar or embarrassing spelling mistakes to kill a winning scholarship essay. So, once you finish working on the piece, consider proofreading it or asking friends or parents to help you out with it.
• Don’t postpone it till the last minute. Don’t risk the success of your project by writing it the last night. This is an important task, and you should dedicate enough time and effort to working on it.

Education is an expensive pleasure. However, you can always save some money by crafting a winning scholarship essay and getting financial support from the college of your dream. So, use tips by HandMadeWriting essay writer  and write the best paper ever!

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6 Awesome Scholarship Essays That Worked

When it comes to paying for college, scholarships are the best form of financial aid, since they offer students free money that never needs to be repaid. But let’s face it: completing scholarship applications, especially the essays, can feel overwhelming. The scholarship essay is arguably the most important part of the application and should be well-thought-out. In this article, we’ll walk  through five scholarship essay examples and explain why they worked, so that you can write your own winning scholarship essays .

Here are 6 winning scholarship essay examples that worked:

Why this scholarship essay example worked:, how could this essay have been better , want more resources on writing your scholarship essay, get started with your scholarship essay.

The essay is your chance to let your personality and life experiences shine through, giving you the opportunity to stand out from other applicants.

The best way to get an idea of what scholarship committees are looking for is to look over scholarship essay examples from past winners. Take some time to analyze the writing style, think about the strong points, and consider how you can improve. Below, we’ll show you just how you might dissect a scholarship essay.

1. Going Merry Scholarship Success Story by Gabby DeMott

What’s a winning scholarship essay look like? Check out this Going Merry success story with Gabby DeMott.

ESSAY PROMPT: Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others.

“There were only a few minutes to go and our eyes were glued to the screen. On the edge of our seats, clutching whoever happened to be next to us, we watched as the referee blew his whistle and the German players took their free kick. The ball was hit with precision and skill; it flew up over the Swedish players, past their goalie, and was caught safely in the back of the opposing team’s net. We all jumped up and screamed, a mixture of German and English, of excitement and relief, of pride and anticipation.

We stood, enraptured, for the last several minutes of the game as Germany kept its 2-1 lead over Sweden. The horde of us, Germans and Americans alike, hugged and cheered and made our way out onto the balcony, where we chanted “Deutschland! Deutschland! Deutschland!” for the whole village, the whole country, the whole world to hear. Never have I felt so accepted while being an outsider, so proud of a country that isn’t even mine, so part of something I didn’t really belong to.

My German friends didn’t care that we were from different countries; they didn’t care that we would only be staying for three weeks. They accepted us into their homes and their daily lives, their traditions and their celebrations. In watching that World Cup game, it didn’t matter that we were from different places; we were all cheering for the same team. The acceptance I felt in Germany extended beyond that living room. I came to the country on a three week exchange with ten other students from my school.

We each stayed with host families and attended the Wildermuth Gymnasium, which was surprisingly accommodating to a gaggle of loud American teenagers. The teachers were friendly and welcoming, the students treated us like ordinary peers, and even the people I interacted with in public were understanding.

Before coming to Germany I feared judgment based on my level of the language (which is nowhere near as good as the German students’ English) and American politics. It was intimidating to be in a country with limited knowledge of the language and the customs, even though everyone was welcoming. People did ask myself and the other students about the US’s political climate, but no one blamed us for it. They recognized that we were outsiders, that the place we came from had flaws, and they accepted us anyway.

Since that trip, I’ve found myself trying to provide that acceptance to people in my own country. For example, I work at a canoe livery and we receive a lot of visitors with limited English. Some of my coworkers will avoid such customers because they don’t want to take the time to explain things, to exercise patience with someone who may not understand them. If people had done this to me in Germany, my time there would have been much less enjoyable; in fact, I would have been offended.

So now when someone walks up to me at the livery and asks a question in English that isn’t perfect, I smile and welcome them. I take my time to make sure they understand, that they can have a good time, and that they feel accepted. It’s a small action, but I know firsthand that it can make a big impact, at my place of work and in the world. “

• It shares a personal story of realization. Gabby’s essay throws us right in the middle of the action in her story, from her perspective. She paints a clear picture of where she is, how she feels, and what her goals were in that moment. She then goes on to explain the unity of the German and American students to introduce other people in the essay. LESSON TO TAKE : When including additional people in an essay, introduce them early on so you can continue telling your story in an organic way.
• She reflects on her previous fears and explains how she’s moved past those to grow. In the fifth paragraph, Gabby shares how she feared judgment due to her level of the German language and American politics. As Gabby became more familiar with the host families and her German friends, she realizes they accepted her, and she relaxes. LESSON TO TAKE: Sharing a story in sequential order can help illustrate personal growth and how your character changed for the better.
• She answers the prompt and demonstrates how she’ll put her newfound knowledge in action. Once Gabby realized her German friends and host family accepted her, regardless of her fears, that sparked a realization for her when she returned home to America. Gabby concludes her essay by explaining how she’s providing that same acceptance she received in another country to acquaintances and people in her country, to be patient, help them enjoy themselves, and to welcome them.  LESSON TO TAKE : Consider concluding your essay with a wrap-up of what you learned, and how you plan to apply that lesson in your life.

2. Who is a “Good” Doctor? by Joseph Lee

Below is a winning essay from Joseph Lee, Rush Medical College for the Giva Scholarship.

ESSAY PROMPT: Who is (or what makes) a good doctor?

“Had you asked me the same question one year ago, my answer would have been vastly different to the one I will give today. In the summer of 2012, with my first year of medical school completed, I embarked upon my last official summer vacation with two things in mind: a basketball tournament in Dallas and one in Atlanta. My closest friends and I had been playing in tournaments for the past 10 summers, and it was a sacred bond forged together in the name of competition. However, two weeks before our first tournament, I became instantly and overwhelmingly short of breath. Having been born to Korean immigrant parents, I was raised to utilize the hospital in emergency cases only, and I knew this was such a case. A few scans later, doctors discovered numerous pulmonary emboli (PE), caused by a subclavian deep vein thrombosis (DVT), and just like that, I was lying in a bed of a major hospital for a life threatening condition.

Fast forward a few months, and I am lying in a similar bed to treat the underlying cause of the subclavian DVT: a first rib removal. There is little that can adequately prepare someone physically, emotionally or spiritually to undergo surgery; and my thoughts continued to race in the days following. In addition to the expected physical pain, isolation, fear and frustration were a few of the emotions I experienced in the four day ordeal. The procedure went according to plan thanks to a skilled surgeon and his team, but the attributes that made the doctor “good” went far beyond his ability to operate.

“Wow. I’m glad you are feeling better” and “I can’t believe you went through that” are common reactions people have when they see the scars on my upper chest. Quite frankly, the past nine months have been difficult, literally full of blood, sweat and tears. But through it all, I have been able to maintain my positivity and gratitude knowing that I have gained the invaluable experience of being a patient and discovering the vulnerability and trust that patients give their doctors. Patients indulge information to doctors that they may have never told anyone in their life and in doing so, place a great deal of trust and responsibility in the hands of a doctor. Many patients will not understand the mechanism of disease behind their condition and anticipate that the doctor will explain to them and their family why it is that they are feeling the way they are and ultimately heal them. And that is precisely what my surgeon understood: the privilege of being able to care for patients and the intimacy of the doctor-patient relationship. And as I awoke to the care of my worried parents, the first thing they wanted to discuss was the details of the procedure that was methodically and patiently explained to them by my “good” doctor.

In study after study, patients have reported dissatisfaction with their medical care, not because of lack of knowledge or health outcome, but because their doctors did not show enough warmth in the encounter or listen to the patient’s questions and concerns. There are few times where a patient and their loved ones are more vulnerable and in need of compassion than when dealing with a hospitalization. And for some doctors, a patient may be another item on a checklist, but that patient is someone’s mother or father, son or daughter, sister or brother. My “good” doctor understood this and would often say “If you were my son…” when discussing treatment options, reflecting on the type of care he would want for his family and treating me similarly. Such ideals are rooted in love and compassion for patients, not as clients in the health care system, but as fellow human beings striving to make something of themselves and the world around them (I).

Unfortunately, the ordeal of living with a chronic illness or undergoing a major operation extends beyond the confines of the hospital. Whether it is creditors harassing patients for medical bills, prescriptions that need to be refilled, or lifestyle modifications that need to be made, the health care experience doesn’t end when a patient walks out of the hospital doors. It often takes merely a minute, as in the case of the “good” doctor who told me that as a student I could apply to get the procedure financially covered by the hospital. Such foresight in anticipating financial concerns and directing me on the next steps to be taken provided relief in the surmounting stress.

Lastly, the “good” doctor understands that as our patients are human, so are we. This means we will make mistakes, some of which can result in life-threatening consequences. With that said, the “good” doctor practices humility and honesty, apologizing and sharing as much information with patients as possible. Although no one strives to make mistakes, they will happen, and how one reacts to them is a distinguishing feature of the “good” doctor (II).

Of all the qualities I tried to explain in what makes a “good” doctor, there was no emphasis on skill and knowledge. And while being able to fulfill the duties of making the correct diagnosis and appropriate treatment plans is expected, the intangibles of love, compassion, foresight and honesty is what makes a doctor, “good”. I learned such lessons in the purest manner possible, by being a patient myself, and will use them to guide me in all future patient encounters, as I strive to be a “good” doctor.”

• It tells a captivating story. This essay immediately pulls the reader in, immersing the audience right in the story. . We want to know how Joseph’s definition of a good doctor changed and why it did so. Hooking your reader from the first sentence of your essay or even the first paragraph is a surefire way to keep your reader engaged in the story you’re telling. The story itself is also told really well, with good pacing and just enough detail to elicit empathy without causing boredom. (He could have easily given too much scientific/medical detail!)  LESSON TO TAKE : When telling an anecdote, consider how much detail is the right amount, to make it engaging.
• It’s a list, without you realizing it’s a list. After the first 2 paragraphs (which are mostly story-telling), the rest of the essay is effectively a list of ways that doctors are “good”: they recognize the intimacy and trust involved in the doctor-patient relationship (paragraphs 3-4), they anticipate future sources of patient stress (paragraph 5), and they exercise humility (paragraph 6). Joseph could have easily structured the essay simply by saying “There are 3 main things that make a doctor good” and then explaining each idea. However, that would have been much more boring! Instead, he expertly hides the list format, by couching it in an engaging story. LESSON TO TAKE: Not all list-type essays need to feel like lists.
• It’s personal and believable. Joseph takes a negative personal experience, shows what he learned from it and how it caused him to grow as a person. Sometimes essays about singular, defining moments or experiences can seem blown out of proportion and thus not credible. This one feels right: a big ordeal in his life that has therefore shifted his perspective.  LESSON TO TAKE : Consider which personal stories to tell, and make sure the “size” of the story feels right.

3. Life Happens Scholarship by Emily Trader

Here is an example of a moving scholarship essay on the topic of family loss by Emily Trader for the Life Happens award.

ESSAY PROMPT: How has the death of a parent or guardian impacted your life financially and emotionally? Be sure to describe how the loss of your parent/guardian impacted your college plans, and explain how the lack of adequate (or any) life insurance coverage has impacted your family’s financial situation.

“When I was seventeen years old, my father lost his battle with kidney failure and cardiovascular disease. As long as I shall live, I do not believe that I will ever forget the first moment I saw my father’s once vibrant face in that cold and unforgiving casket. I won’t forget his lifeless and defeated hands, or how his pale lips would never utter another joke or speak to his grandchildren. Even though the day of his funeral was undoubtedly the worst day of my life, I wish I could relive it just to be with him one more time. Since that moment, I have felt as if all of my grief and longing resides underneath my skin with nothing to relieve the pressure. On September 8th, 2016, I lost my voice of reason, my confidant, my cheerleader, and my best friend.

Unbeknownst to me at the time, I had lost so much more. Upon my father’s passing, he left us with funeral and medical expenses that his insurance would not cover. Because he did not have any form of life insurance, the financial burden of his death was now the responsibility of my mother and me. Even though my mother works night shifts as a neonatal nurse and her commute is nearly two hours, she was forced to pick up extra shifts to support my family. Though I already had a job and I worked about ten hours a week, I now work anywhere from twenty-five to thirty-five hours a week, and I am also a full-time high honor student. Even though the death of my father forced me to realize the importance of cherishing time with my family, I do not see them very often because of our busy schedules. I also sacrificed my social life and the joy that every senior in high school should experience. Instead of football games and homecoming, I had to deal with mourning and the possibility that I would not attend college because of my family’s financial troubles.

If my father had a life insurance policy, we would not have to work ourselves to the bone and sacrifice our physical and emotional well-being to keep up with expenses. I would not have to worry so intensely about the future of my education on top of the crippling grief that I have felt over the last five months. If this devastating experience has taught me anything, it is this: financial planning for these situations is absolutely invaluable. I will not soon forget the stress and despair that I have experienced, and I now realize that to have a life insurance policy is to throw your surviving family members a crucial lifeline. Though no one can ever prepare you for the trauma of losing a parent, life insurance allows you to grieve without the constant stress of financial burden, and for that reason, it is an absolutely essential precaution.

I love and miss you so much, Dad. Thank God I will see you again.”

• She answers the prompt . It would be easy to write an essay that just spoke to her grief, or to what her father was like and how much he meant to her. But the essay prompt asks applicants to reflect on how the loss has affected the student emotionally and financially. Emily does a great job of this, by connecting the financial parts (she and her mother needing to pick up extra hours of work), with the emotional (due to the work schedule, the family not being able to spend as much time together). She also addresses how this might affect her college plans. LESSON TO TAKE : 
• She provides (beautiful) detail. The first paragraph immediately pulls the reader in because of the detailed description she provides (“ his lifeless and defeated hands”, “pale lips” ). Similarly, the specificity of how her family is shouldering the financial burden (e.g. her working 25-to-35-hour weeks) make it feel more real rather than generic.  LESSON TO TAKE : Use details and descriptions to make something feel more emotional and tangible.
• She knows her audience . This scholarship is funded by Life Happens, an organization formed by seven leading insurance providers, in order to educate the public about important insurance planning topics. Clearly Emily researched the provider and understood that an essay that spoke to the importance of insurance planning would be well-received by the essay readers. LESSON TO TAKE : Research the scholarship provider and adjust your content to fit the organization’s or company’s mission statement (or business model).

4. Going Merry Scholarship Success Story by Jesus Adrian Arroyo-Ramirez

Jesús Adrian Arroyo-Ramirez wrote a winning scholarship essay (and video!) that he submitted on Going Merry . He earned an outstanding $40,000 through the Golden Door Scholarship.

ESSAY PROMPT: What differentiates you from the hundreds of DACA students who apply to our scholarship? Use one of those opportunities to tell us something else we cannot see just by looking at your grades, test scores, and transcripts.

“I always knew I was different than my friends in some way. Growing up, I struggled to speak English while everyone else had little to no problems. I needed extra help in school while my friends coasted by with ease. My friends would hop on planes and travel all around the world while I had to stay at home. At the age of 13 all of my friends started driving while I still couldn’t.

I built up the courage and asked my mother why I did not have access to the simple liberties everyone else did. My name Is Jesus Adrian Arroyo-Ramirez, and I was illegally brought to this country when I was just six years old. At the time I had no clue that I was breaking any laws, and I did not realize the fact that my life was going to change forever. Growing up with a different citizenship situation than my peers was and still is the biggest challenge I have to face in my life.

Looking back there is not a single thing that I would change. Knowing that I had to work harder than everyone else lead me to be the person that I am today. I took that fire inside of me, pushed myself, graduated first in my class with a cumulative 4.0 GPA, became a Kansas Scholar, and graduated High School with a semester’s worth of college credit. In November of 2016, everything began to look up for me. I received a work permit and a social security card all thanks to the DACA program. I was finally able to get my license, get a job, and most importantly attend college.

I plan to continue my success in the classroom and do everything to the best of my ability as I know that under my current circumstances it can all be ripped away from me at any moment. Growing up with my situation has taught me to not take advantage of a single opportunity. There has been continued support around me past and current and I know there are people out there rooting for my success. I will strive to be the first generation in my family to graduate from an American University and I will set a stepping stone for my future family so they will not have to struggle as I did. My citizenship is not a setback, it is a mere obstacle that I will always learn to work around if it means giving my future children a better life, just like my mother did for me.”

• He shares how hardships made him who he is today. Right off the bat, Jesus sets the tone for his essay by sharing how he struggled to speak English and that he was not given the same opportunities as his peers. He shares his mother’s explanation on why he lived a different life, along with his honesty in the challenges of growing up with a different citizenship situation than the teens around him. LESSON TO TAKE : Share personal details (as you feel comfortable), and consider including a defining memory or conversation hat contributes to your story. This can help paint a picture of your beginnings or your inspirations.
• He includes emotional details. Although Jesus grew up with hardships, he persevered and mentions he wouldn’t change anything. It may have taken a little longer than his peers to get his license, but he also excelled in school, pushed himself to graduate first in class, and take college courses on top of all that. LESSON TO TAKE : Tell your story with details, feelings, thoughts and emotions to explain where you came from and where you are now.
• He plans for the future . Jesus shared his personal story with us, and then explains how he plans to continue his success without letting anything get in the way of his path. He goes on to say his citizenship is not a setback, and that he works to provide a better life for himself and for his future children. LESSON TO TAKE : Include your plan at the end of the essay. Consider how you’ve grown and how you will bring these lessons learned with you to help your future.

5. Why College Is Important to Me by Nicole Kuznetsov

Here’s an example of a simple yet creative and heartfelt essay on the popular prompt, Why is college important to you?

ESSAY PROMPT: Why do you want to go to college? Why is it important to you?

“As a child, my life had structure. Coloring books had lines, letters took on very specific shapes, and a system of rules governed everything from board games to the classroom. I found comfort in the fact that my future had an easy-to-follow template: elementary, middle, and high school, college, job, family retirement, “happily ever after” ending. When I graduated from elementary school I was told I completed 25% of my education. During my middle school graduation, I was told I was halfway there and I know I’ll be told I’m 75% done when I throw my cap in the air this June. College was always factored into the percentage and the overall formula for life. And I never questioned its importance. I always figured it is important because it is necessary.

Going to college makes sense. From helping my parents land stable jobs after coming to America to giving my brother the chance to gain work experience at some of the top financial firms, college educations have shown their worth in my family. Yet I didn’t think about what actually goes on inside the magical universities until I entered high school. Applying to the Academy for Math, Science, and Engineering was the first time I had actively made a decision in my education. With the encouragement of my parents and favorite science teacher who recognized that I would excel in the challenging environment of like-minded students, I applied. Four years later, I can confidently say they were right.

My class of twenty-six has shown me the benefits of a collaborative rather than a competitive environment, especially the impact that camaraderie with my peers has on our collective learning experience. Each student has an inspiring level of passion and motivation that made me excited to learn, work on projects, and participate in discussions both in and out of the classroom. I used my education to gain skills and open doors for myself such as an internship at my local hospital. I gained confidence in my abilities to communicate with individuals from strangers my age to practicing professionals. I was thinking longer and harder than I ever had before to solve individual problems and large-scale challenges. In all honesty, I was having fun.

Looking back on my years at the Academy I realize how big of an impact the school made on how I view education. I wasn’t coming to school to mark another day off my calendar and inch closer to finishing the next 25%. I came to school to learn and question and push myself. Now, as a senior, I’m excited. I’m thankful for the sample that my high school gave me of what learning is supposed to be like and thankful that it left me wanting more. I’m entering college in August with a new understanding of its importance. It is important because it is what I want for my future.”

• It finds structure through chronology . This essay is basically structured like a chronological timeline: As a child, I believed this. Then I applied to this high school (my first active academic decision). Then the high school changed me. Now I’m a senior and I believe this. Not all stories are best told in time order, but the simplest stories often are. And simple stories provide structure, which scholarship committees love. LESSON TO TAKE: Consider structuring your essay like a timeline, emphasizing the milestones along the way that have led you to where you are today. 
• It is simply told . While the essay is descriptive, it doesn’t try to get fancy with overly flowery language or unnecessarily long SAT words. And that’s the strength of it. For instance, this passage [“ College was always factored into the percentage and the overall formula for life. And I never questioned its importance. I always figured it is important because it is necessary” ] explains her child’s logic in a really clear and well-written way. 
• It’s got (mostly) great topic sentences . We here at Going Merry love a good topic sentence– that is, a sentence at the beginning (or end) of a paragraph that summarizes the rest of the paragraph. It helps “signpost” the most important parts of your essay. Here, three of the four paragraphs (1, 2, and 4) have strong and concise topic sentences. “As a child, my life had structure” sets up the rest of the paragraph to explain what these structures and unquestioned rules were. “Going to college makes sense” sets up why college made sense to her parents. 

6. Financial Literacy for Hispanic Women by Rosaisha Ozoria

The inaugural Founder’s Scholarship supported by the New York Women’s Bond Club in honor of Michaela Walsh goes to two New York City public high school students who won an essay competition writing about their hopes for the future of women and girls worldwide . Winners of this scholarship won a trip to accompany Women’s World Banking to Amman, Jordan for their biennial gathering of WWB network members.

PROMPT: Write about your hopes for the future of women and girls worldwide.

WINNING ESSAY:

“Twice a week I head down to volunteer at the Los Sures Social Services office, situated next to the local senior citizen home, to help at the food pantry. We distribute food to people in my neighborhood. Many are familiar faces. Many are middle-aged Hispanic women with children dangling from their hips like grass skirts. These women are there as a result of their culture and lack of financial knowledge. In our Spanish culture, patriarchy prevents women from preparing for themselves as much as they should. This leads to Hispanic women having little or no money management skills. Financial illiteracy is a major issue in my neighborhood, and that is why I hope to give Hispanic women a chance for a better future through financial education.

While I was volunteering I met a woman who happened to live in the same building as my aunt. Unemployed with two young children, and a husband earning minimum wage at a fast food restaurant, she struggled to get by every day. I thought to myself – many in my community are just like her. Then I realized I could do something to help. How? I can start a financial literacy program, which teaches Hispanic women to earn and manage money. Once a woman becomes financially literate, she is capable of making good personal and professional decisions, empowering her to improve her family’s financial well-being. Moreover, such a program will help Hispanic women become competitive employees, even in a slow recovering economy such as the one we are experiencing now.

Participating in the 2013 Women’s World Banking Global Meeting in Amman, Jordan gives me access to invaluable resources that will help me achieve this goal. I hope to find mentors from a roomful of inspiring, experienced leaders who will offer me their guidance. Also, meeting accomplished women from other countries means access to new ideas and unique perspectives. And if I am lucky, I may even come across individuals who can provide financial support to jumpstart my financial literacy program for Hispanic women. Lastly, I will tell my idea to everyone I meet in Jordan, a baby step to help Hispanic women rise from poverty.

The world continues to change rapidly, especially with globalization. It is about time that Hispanic women strive for gender equality. Thus, it is essential that Hispanic women increase their roles and knowledge in finance. The women in my neighborhood shall no longer be left out. I will task myself to help these women become better, stronger and most importantly, take control of their lives. I want to be involved so that they can save themselves from any unforeseen financial crisis. This is a tremendous goal, but for me, it is an opportunity to make a difference – in my neighborhood and for my Spanish community.”

• There is clear structure . Right off the bat, the introduction summarizes what the reader can expect to find in the body of the essay. In particular, the closing line of the first paragraph (“ Financial illiteracy is a major issue in my neighborhood, and that is why I hope to give Hispanic women a chance for a better future through financial education”) works as an effective topic sentence, tying together the anecdote and the reason she’s interested in networking with the scholarship provider, Women’s World Banking. The last 2 paragraphs also serve clear, independent purposes: the penultimate one establishes what she would do with the scholarship (the trip to Amman), and the final paragraph explains why her particular interest is important for the larger Hispanic community. LESSON TO TAKE: Clear structure helps the reader follow your point better (especially if they’re skimming, which scholarship essay readers almost definitely are!) So include a summarizing topic sentence at the beginning or end of your first paragraph, and make sure each subsequent paragraph serves a purpose that moves forward your argument or story. 
• The author’s passion shines. Rosaisha, the scholarship winner, is clearly passionate about serving her Hispanic community of women.  And rather than simply saying that, she shows us how she cares by using personal examples from her volunteer work. LESSON TO TAKE : Show, don’t tell. Use specific personal examples, and don’t be afraid to show your emotions.
• She stays positive.   Even though Rosaisha discusses what might be considered a  difficult and personal topic, she keeps the tone light and inspirational. She expresses hope and her desire to make a change in the world, answering the essay in a positive tone.  It’s important to make sure your essay is not too depressing to read. (Essays about personal trauma are a bad idea.) This is a scholarship provider, not a therapist! 

While this was a winning essay, we note that it did have two points of weakness: 

• The second paragraph lacks a bit of structure. Her point ends up feeling a bit generic, and it’s unclear what she is thinking versus planning or actually doing . For instance, she realized she could start a financial literacy program. Did she then do so? It’s unclear. 
• The last paragraph is again a bit general. Often scholarship committees want to see what concrete steps will be taken, using the scholarship award. Here she speaks in lofty terms about what goals she hopes to accomplish, without explaining ways she might accomplish this goal. 

For more information on writing a killer scholarship essay, check out our list of helpful tips .

Also check out these related blog posts: 

• 6 tips for writing scholarship essays about academic goals
• How to write the best personal statement, with examples
• How to write an awesome essay about your career goals

You can start writing your winning scholarship essay today and submit it to thousands of scholarship applications, all in one place. Sign up for Going Merry today to put your pro scholarship essay writing skills to practice. Going Merry is your one-stop scholarship shop to search and apply for scholarships to get you on the right foot for funding your future.

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