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Hi all, my parents recently got divorced and it's had a big impact on my life. I want to write about it in my college essay, but I don't want it to sound too negative. Any advice on how to approach this topic and share my story in a meaningful way?

When writing a college essay about your parents' divorce, it's important to focus on personal growth and development rather than the negativity of the situation. Here are some tips to help you approach this topic in a meaningful way:

1. Focus on your growth: Highlight how the experience of your parents getting divorced has led to personal growth or development. Perhaps you learned valuable lessons about resilience, independence, or empathy from the situation. Show how these qualities have made you a stronger person and will benefit you in your future academic and personal pursuits.

2. Share a specific personal anecdote: Avoid talking about your parents' divorce in general terms. Instead, focus on a specific event or moment from your life that illustrates the impact of the divorce on you. This will make your essay more engaging and relatable to the reader.

3. Balance positivity and realism: While it's important not to dwell on the negative aspects of your parents' divorce, you also want to be honest about the challenges you faced. Try to strike a balance between acknowledging the adversity you've been through and emphasizing the positive growth or realizations that emerged from the situation.

4. Demonstrate self-awareness: Being introspective about how the experience has shaped you is crucial. Show that you have a deep understanding of your emotions, thoughts, and reactions throughout the process. This shows maturity and self-awareness, which are qualities that colleges value in their applicants.

5. Relate the experience to your goals: Explain how your parents' divorce and the lessons you learned from it have influenced your academic, career, or life goals. This will help the reader understand the significance of your story and see how it's relevant to your aspirations.

6. Proofread and revise: Finally, make sure to revise, proofread, and seek feedback from a trusted teacher, counselor, or mentor to ensure your essay is well-written and effectively conveys your message.

By focusing on your personal growth, sharing a specific anecdote, balancing positivity with realism, demonstrating self-awareness, and relating your experience to your goals, you can write a meaningful college essay about your parents' divorce that will resonate with admissions officers.

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Home — Essay Samples — Life — Divorce — My Experience of Growing Up with Divorced Parents

My Experience of Growing Up with Divorced Parents

Categories: Divorce Parents

About this sample

Words: 407 |

Updated: 8 November, 2023

Words: 407 | Page: 1 | 3 min read

Works Cited

Amato, P. R., & Kane, J. B. (2011). Life-course pathways and the psychosocial adjustment of children of divorce. Journal of Family Issues, 32(2), 153-171.
Emery, R. E. (2019). Two homes, one childhood: A parenting plan to last a lifetime. Penguin.
Fabricius, W. V., & Luecken, L. J. (2007). Postdivorce living arrangements, parent conflict, and long-term physical health correlates for children of divorce. Journal of Family Psychology, 21(2), 195-205.
Fine, M. A., & Fine, G. A. (2014). Handbook of divorce and relationship dissolution. Routledge.
Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (1999). The seven principles for making marriage work: A practical guide from the country's foremost relationship expert. Three Rivers Press.
Hetherington, E. M., & Kelly, J. (2002). For better or for worse: Divorce reconsidered. W. W. Norton & Company.
Irwin, R. L., & Ryan, J. M. (2013). Counseling and divorce. Springer Science & Business Media.
Kelly, J. B., & Emery, R. E. (2003). Children's adjustment following divorce: Risk and resilience perspectives. Family Relations, 52(4), 352-362.
Wallerstein, J. S., Lewis, J. M., & Blakeslee, S. (2000). The unexpected legacy of divorce: The 25 year landmark study. Hachette UK.
Walsh, F. (2016). Normal family processes: Growing diversity and complexity. Guilford Publications.

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How to Write Your College Essay About Divorced Parents

When you plan to write your college essay about divorced parents, you may be concerned about the practicality and appropriateness of the topic. This essay topic seems to be something that a lot of people ask about. Usually, they ask this:

“Is it okay to write my college essay about divorced parents?”

Here’s our honest opinion: writing your college essay about divorced parents is okay if –and only if– it demonstrates that you are a wise investment to the university ROI-wise.

Okay, so that sounds sort of weird, right? Why not give a straightforward “yes” or “no” answer? What the heck is an “ROI”? What does any of this even mean?

Well, as admissions experts, we’ve seen how the college admissions process can be much more complicated than that. The line between a good essay topic that can sway the admissions decision from rejected to accepted –or accepted to rejected– is very thin. There are no cut-and-dry formulas that can guarantee acceptance or rejection. However, there is a fundamental mindset you should adopt when writing your college essay about divorced parents.

Think of the admissions process from a utilitarian perspective. Remember: at the end of the day, you are sending your applications and transcripts because they are tools to help the university screen you. The admissions office has a duty of screening your value as a candidate to their university. You can choose to write your college essay about divorced parents as long as you show that you are a good return of investment (ROI) to the school. That means the school should have a good reason for reserving a spot for you in their institution, investing money on you, spending professor time on you, and accommodating you.

You need to show that your college essay about divorced parents makes you a great candidate for that.

Therefore, the question should not be “can I write my college essay about divorced parents”. Instead, it should be, “how can I write my college essay about divorced parents in a way that makes me the best asset to the school?”

Sounds difficult, right? “What if they think I’m too whiny?” “What if it doesn’t make me seem strong?”

Trust us. There are some fantastic college essays about divorced parents that we’ve seen and edited. Some of these essays managed to help students get into fantastic schools like Berkeley and USC. We’ll show you how to do exactly that below.

Table of Contents:

The Anatomy of a Good College Essay About Divorced Parents.

How to avoid being cliché., demonstrating value as a candidate in your college essay., the danger of mental instability and unsafe family background..

There are many things that make a good college essay. All college essays must demonstrate some value to the admissions office, and show how you are someone worth investing in. However, the anatomy of a college essay about divorced parents can differ.

We’ve deconstructed the parts that make up a good essay about this topic. Here is a general outline of what you should have.

A strong hook that stands out from the rest of the sob stories.
An introduction that reveals some of what happened with the divorce.
A deeper articulation and description of what exactly that felt like.
A section covering the insinuation behind what had happened.
Demonstrating how you have grown or surpassed the obstacles of divorce.
How does this make you a great candidate for the school.

We understand that the college admissions essays are not always long enough to contain all six of these sections. Sometimes you’ll be limited in your word count, and have to make sacrifices along the way. Or, you’ll have to make things shorter.

One of the things you should definitely have in your college essay, no matter the topic, is at least some insinuation –whether implied or written clearly in a single paragraph– about why your experience makes you a good fit for the school (i.e. why you’re worth investing in).

One of the dangers of talking about family problems in your college essay is writing something that comes across as cliché.

With how competitive college admissions processes are in the past few years –and how they’re getting harder with every passing year– it is critical that you have a method of standing out amongst the crowd more now than ever before. Should you write an essay that sounds cliché, you won’t be able to stand out as well. The college admissions essays are an asset. They are the only section in your whole college application that gives you the chance to talk your way into college outside of measurements like GPAs and test scores. If your essay sounds too much like what others write, you won’t be able to capitalize on the essay section as much as you could have to differentiate yourself from the rest.

So, how does one avoid being cliché when writing their college essay about divorced parents?

The first order of business is to recognize that despite many applicants who also have divorced parents, your experience is different from the rest. You may have gone through a similar event in your life along with others, but your experience and manner of processing the emotions are different. Let’s look at an example.

Dario: Mother divorced father due to the father’s hot temper. Dario’s big takeaway is his lack of a father figure, and learning to cope with that.
Anatoly: Mother divorced father due to the father’s hot temper. Anatoly’s big takeaway is his trust issues due to feeling abandoned by both family members.

Notice how both applicants have something similar in their experience? Just because they experienced something similar does not mean they will be affected the same way. Thus, just because someone has a similar topic to your essay does not mean it will immediately be cliché. Your experiences and emotional struggles are unique. Therefore, to avoid being cliché, you need to write in detail about what your experience was like.

If your experience made you feel more lost due to lack of a parental structure, you should be specific about those feelings. Perhaps your experience was different because said feelings made focusing on school difficult for you; however, you managed to learn how to cope and succeed academically despite the familial struggles.

However it is you plan to make your college essay stand out amongst the rest of the applicants writing about family divorce, you should make sure that it is hyper specific about its details. If you do not know whether you’ve written your college essay well enough, consider scheduling a free consultation with us over the phone . We will get back to you within 24 hours.

This is going to be the most important part of writing your college essay about divorced parents.

As we said in the beginning of this article guide, the college admissions process boils down to a calculation of whether you are a good candidate ROI-wise. That means that the essays need to frame you as someone who is a wise investment. Think to yourself: why would the university you’re applying for want to bother investing their time, money, and resources giving you an education?

There are a number of ways you can answer this. I’ve listed a few below.

Accepting you as a student would give the university good press.
Accepting you as a student would revivify a part of the school that needs development. (not enough people of color, a stem culture that needs more business acumen, etc)
Accepting you as a student would greatly contribute to the school’s department which you’re applying for.
Accepting you as a student would improve the overall sociability of the school, thereby improving the experience of other students and creating a positive ripple effect.

Okay, now let’s take a look at how we’re going to write a college essay while demonstrating our value as a worthy candidate to the university. Think about the topic of being a child of divorced parents. What was your experience like? What did it do to you as a result? In what ways have you grown and developed as a person over time? Is there a way that growth experience can be translated to your future experience at university? In other words, think in this order:

how to write a college essay about divorced parents

That last step is the crux of your execution. You need to show that the lessons you’ve learned or the experiences you’ve developed from your parent’s divorce reveals some strength or skill applicable to the school.

So, let’s say that you want to write about your relationship with your family turning sour after a messy family divorce. You’e realized your mother had been keeping an affair with your father. This has inexorably ruined your relationship with women as a whole, and you’ve struggled to have a healthy relationship that views women in a positive light without judgment. Thus, you’ve gone on a personal journey with your father to rekindle your relationship with trusting women as a whole. Through this, you’ve discovered critical feminist theory, and had constructive discussions with people who were willing to have uncomfortable conversations with you about rekindling your trust issues with women. Today, you are someone who champions a hybrid of feminist critique as an antidote to negative toxic viewpoints of women. You also hope to use these philosophies to help other struggling men who feel that they have developed a strained relationship with the opposite sex.

This is a red flag that you should be careful about.

When writing your college essay about divorced parents, you should consider the possibility of a Sword of Damocles. Whilst writing this essay topic, the admissions officers may have the idea that a broken family due to divorced parents can lead to mental instability and unsafe conditions at the back of their mind.

With the rise of mental health issues amongst students, the admissions offices at universities must take extra consideration when tackling issues such as mental health. In particular, they have to be more careful now than ever before about letting in students who they believe may be a threat to the community due to mental instability. Therefore, it is imperative that you establish in the essay that despite having a family of divorced parents, you are in no way potentially posing an issue to the school.

That means reassuring that your academic performance is unaffected, and in the future you will be safe and secure with no extraneous issues.

If you are struggling to write a good college essay about divorced parents, you may want to consider speaking with a professional college essay editor and advisor. Contact us for a free consultation. We will get back to you within 24 hours, and can provide you with a free review + advising on your application essay.

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Putting Divorce into Context in Your Applications

October 4, 2019

Applications

After years of working with students, I’ve seen that dealing with divorce as a part of the college process can be challenging for students. While many family separations are amicable or mutually chosen, many others contain feelings of loss, grief, anger and sadness . If you are a student who has faced the challenges presented by divorced parents in any way, this blog is for you!

In my last two blogs ( Part 1 / Part 2 ), I gave advice to divorced families regarding finances and the college search process . Making sure your family understands their financial plan and has a good process in place can help things go much more smoothly. However, when it comes to filling out the application, you – the student – will be faced with clearly explaining how divorce affected you.

For many students, the timing of a parents’ divorce could not be worse – when it happens during high school, it can distract you from activities, destabilize your financial support, impede on your emotional support system, and/or a hamper your studies right when grades are most important . Even if it happened several years ago, you may still be struggling with the reshuffling of your life. In these cases, it is important that you explain this to colleges. Here are three of the best ways to do that.

1) You can write about these circumstances in the additional information section of the Common Application . This section allows you to write up to 650 words “if you wish to provide details of circumstances or qualifications not reflected in the application.” When writing a summary of your parents’ divorce, keep it fairly factual (as opposed to highly emotional), and point clearly to how the circumstances of divorce impacted your application – primarily academic work and extracurricular activities. Typically, you would want an explanation for this section to be shorter than your main essay, so around 150-300 words, but you can use as much space as needed, and should, when appropriate. I recommend doing this when circumstances dictate, as you have little to lose and everything to gain, even if you don’t want to “whine” or “ask for pity” as many of my students say.

2) Write your main Common Application essay about your parents’ divorce. I am very cautious to recommend this strategy, but it can be effective for some students. The primary problem with writing about a highly emotional or traumatic event in your life is that you haven’t always fully processed the event. This makes it very difficult to gain the needed perspective. Frequently, students end up writing with less skill, more difficulty, and less cohesion, because they are trying to explain an experience that taps deep emotions, particularly negative ones. So, how to decide if this is an appropriate topic for your essay? First, decide if writing about this event gives admissions readers unique insight into who you are. Second, ask yourself if this topic will provide better insights about who you are than all other possible topics. Third, make time to write in a journaling style, and then, get feedback from a trusted adult about whether the thoughts present you well and add to the strength of your application.

3) Finally, your school counselor recommendation is another appropriate place for colleges to learn about family circumstances that might have affected your application to college. If you have experienced challenges related to divorce, be sure to communicate those to your counselor. For example, after your parents split up, you might not have been able to visit a particular college to demonstrate interest. You could need more time for your college search , have less time to devote to extracurricular activities because of your living situation, have gone through a period of time where your academics were affected negatively, or have had to get a job. Regardless of the circumstance, be sure to set a meeting with your counselor to fully explain the circumstances and why you’d like them to be included in the letter. Your counselor can help contextualize your circumstances in the school recommendation letter or forms.

While divorce presents challenges for many students, I’ve also worked with many students who found strengths, hopes, or new opportunities because of the change of circumstance in their lives. Living through a challenge can cause you to become more mature or more flexible. Further, it can introduce more support people – such as stepparents – into your life. Look for those positives and emphasize those in your applications, so colleges will see you gaining self reliance, optimism, and strength.

Divorce Blog Part 1

Divorce Blog Part 2

Nicole has dedicated the entirety of her 20 year career to encouraging higher education opportunities. After graduating from Vanderbilt, she worked in her alma mater’s admissions office. The, she completed her PhD in Counseling so she could bring that expertise into college counseling. Nicole partnered with her former Vanderbilt colleague, Fitz Totten, to form Find The Right College and support their mission to make trustworthy advising more accessible.

Want to be ahead of the College Admission process?

Essay Samples on Divorce

Divorce is a complex and deeply personal process that involves the legal dissolution of a marriage. It marks the end of a once-promising union and triggers a range of emotions, from sadness and anger to relief and newfound independence. Understanding the intricacies of divorce and its effects is crucial when writing college essays about divorce.

How to Write College Essays About Divorce

When exploring the subject of divorce, it is important to delve into the factors that contribute to its occurrence and look at college essays about divorce examples. These can include communication issues, incompatibility, domestic abuse, financial strain, or even external factors such as societal expectations or cultural norms. Discussing these causes helps paint a comprehensive picture of the complexities surrounding divorce.

To provide a well-rounded perspective for an example of college essay about divorce, consider including statistics or research findings related to divorce rates, average durations of marriages, or common age groups affected by divorce. This data can help support your arguments and provide a factual foundation for your essay.

Additionally, it is crucial to examine the legal aspects of divorce. Different jurisdictions have specific laws and regulations governing the process, including property division, alimony, child custody, and visitation rights. Incorporating information about these legal frameworks can add depth to your essay and showcase a comprehensive understanding of divorce proceedings.

While divorce can be emotionally challenging, it also offers opportunities for personal growth and self-discovery. Discuss the psychological and emotional impacts divorce can have on individuals, as well as strategies for coping and rebuilding one’s life after the end of a marriage.

Lastly, explore the societal implications of divorce. Analyze how divorce impacts the perception of marriage, family structures, and gender roles. Consider the evolving attitudes towards divorce in different cultures and how society supports or stigmatizes individuals going through this process in the divorce essay example.

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Best topics on Divorce

1. Cause and Effect of Broken Family: Exploring the Impact on Individuals and Society

2. Growing Up with Divorced Parents: Discussing the Topic of Divorce With Your Children

3. Growing Up With Divorced Parents: The Impact of Divorce on the Children

4. The Effects Of Divorce On Children

5. The Effects Of Divorce On Children In America

6. The Effects Of Divorce On Children And Young Adolescents

7. The Causes Of Divorce That Lead To The Annulment

8. The Causes Of Divorce And The Ruined Marriages

9. The Causes Of Divorce: The Reason Marriage Fails

10. The Causes And Effects Of Divorce

11. Main Reasons For Divorce In The United States And How It Impacts Family

12. My Personal Opinion On Why Divorce Shouldn’t Be Legalized

13. Common Social Problems Encountered In Family Life And How They Affect The Marriage

14. Divorce Rates In Kenya And Means To Reduce Them

15. Divorce Process And Finances In Hennepin County

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Updated Dec 15, 2017

How to Handle Your Child’s College Process When You’re Divorced

Apply to College
Application Process
For Parents

Researching, applying to, and paying for college is a complicated process for any family.

But for divorced or separated parents, it can be even trickier. Yet, whether you are recently separated or long-time exes and on the best of terms or the worst of terms, there are a few simple ways that you can team up to help your child.

While there is no one right way to go about it, a good place to start is figuring out what makes the most sense for your family. By getting a head start, setting clear expectations, and establishing healthy modes of communication, both you and your ex can be equally involved in finding the college that will best serve your student.

Keep Your Eyes on the Prize

While it can be tough, it is important to put squabbling aside for the sake of your college-bound child. “During a stressful time, such as when parents are divorcing, it’s easy to let grades and SAT ® scores slip,” says William Wheelan, founder of test preparation firm Sentia Education . “But strong scores can open the door not only to better college options, but also to scholarship money.”

The same goes for joining forces to help your child figure out what they might want to study. When it came time to start looking at colleges, author and father Rodney Lacroix realized that to find the best match, they needed to hone in on his daughter’s potential major. “This meant that the first conversations we had to have were about her interests,” he says. Once they figured out she wanted to pursue criminology, he, his ex-wife, and his daughter were better able to filter colleges based on who offered programs in forensic study. From there, all three considered the requirements together.

Get Started Early, Especially with Financial Aid

This is particularly important for you given the extra layers of communication and negotiation you must manage. It’s also why Kate Driver, director of school counseling at Advanced Math and Science Academy Charter School in Marlborough, Massachusetts, recommends kicking off the college application process as early as sophomore year. Start by learning about financial aid—it will provide a strong foundation and help you avoid surprises later on. If you and your child are also considering private student loans to pay for college, cosigning for them can be a way to offer support.

First things first: Get familiar with the different financial aid applications and what is required of each parent. For the FAFSA ® (Free Application for Federal Student Aid) , only the custodial parent or the one the child lived with the most during the past 12 months must report their income . If the custodial parent is remarried, they must include their spouse’s income as well. The CSS Profile ® , on the other hand, is used primarily by colleges with non-federal financial aid to award, so it asks for much more detail. For this, both parents must report their incomes.

Establish a System

While the details of how you and your ex delegate and communicate will, of course, depend on your relationship and personalities, you want to put in place a plan up front. “Use this agreed-upon method to make other decisions, like who will support which parts of the process,” says Driver.

Lacroix is currently in the middle of the college application process with his oldest daughter and ex-wife. He has found being on good terms with his ex to be invaluable, and he highly recommends “mending bridges” if at all possible. “It’s important to get the other person’s thoughts, because what you may see as a great fit for your child could raise red flags for your co-parent,” he says. “Communication is key.”

And since there is bound to be a lot of information to keep track of, experts are all about organizing it in a shared Google doc or spreadsheet. “I recommend this for every student and family,” says Driver. “But it can be especially helpful for families who aren’t able to have these conversations all in the same room.” Travel dates for campus visits are particularly important to keep on top of when joint custody is involved, adds Ashley Goldsmith, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, so be sure to add those to the spreadsheet too.

Put Your Child in the Driver’s Seat

To empower your child while making things easier with your ex, let the student take the lead. “Allow them to be in charge of keeping track of things like application deadlines, test dates, scheduling visits, and writing the applications,” says Goldsmith. “[Choosing a college] should be as much in your child’s control as possible to prepare them for the responsibilities of adulthood.”

Of course, there’s a difference between empowering your child and putting them in the middle, says Driver. “Arm them with information from both parents about what’s feasible in terms of finances, distance, and any other considerations that may be on your list,” she says. “Working together in a support role can be easier than getting into a battle of wills if both parents are trying to take over.”

Commit to Staying Involved

Take this pledge along with your ex, because equal involvement can cut down on potential resentment and misunderstandings. “Many high schools offer programming, such as college night, financial aid night, etc. to help families,” says Driver. “Both parents should do their best to attend all of these so they’re hearing the same information.”

If joint college visits are not feasible, try to divvy them up so that both parents—and most importantly, the student—can experience a range of options. It’s easy to skip out when they seem like too much of a logistical challenge, but Wheelan says that physically going and seeing the schools can have a profound impact. “Often when our students visit a college and can envision what their lives will be like as college freshmen, it inspires them to redouble their efforts.” It’s important for parents to be a part of this not only to support their child, but also to gather valuable insights of their own.

Lean on Professionals for Help

Especially for parents who do not have an entirely amicable relationship, college advisers and high school counselors can be an invaluable resource. They can help with everything from managing communication to figuring out the details of financial aid.

Goldsmith notes that the college process can trigger a lot of feelings, and a neutral, well-informed professional can work wonders. “As a parent, really try to be aware of what emotions are coming up,” she says. “Are you getting nervous about your child moving far away and therefore advising against an application or visit to a college in another state? Is this process bringing up unworked-through feelings from the divorce? Is talking about money proving particularly delicate? It’s worth involving a college or financial adviser to help you and your family work through the nitty-gritty parts.”

At the end of the day, the most important thing is to keep your child’s interests front and center. Applying to colleges is an exciting and nerve-wracking time, but if approached thoughtfully, you may find that your ex can be a valuable partner and co-parent during the sometimes wild ride.

FAFSA ® is a registered trademark of the US Department of Education and is not affiliated with Discover ® Student Loans.

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Related articles, how to communicate with admissions officers when you’re applying to college, where to draw the line in your child’s college application process, everything you need to know about common app, 7 ways to make your college application essay stand out.

5 Ways to Help Your College Student Cope With Parent Divorce

You can take steps to mitigate the impact of your divorce on your child..

Posted March 11, 2024 | Reviewed by Davia Sills

The Challenges of Divorce
Find counselling to heal from a divorce
One challenge college students may face is parent divorce.
College students of divorcing parents worry about impacts on paying for school and on siblings' well-being.
Parents can help their students by encouraging them to seek therapy and speak with financial aid if needed.

“If you divorce Mom, I’ll divorce you.” This dramatic statement comes from Kat, the 30-something daughter of Warren, who has told his wife and Kat’s mother that he is ending their marriage .

The book Leaving by Roxana Robinson, which was published last month, explores the impact on a family when an older parent is considering divorce. Kat’s declaration is a parent’s worst fear . However, I believe Kat’s response is not typical. In fact, the book does provide a counterexample of Sarah’s children coming around to understanding and accepting their mother’s decision to leave their father. Most of the students I see respond like Sarah’s children. At the same time, they worry about the practical consequences of the separation to their siblings and themselves.

Here is an example of a response I see in my work as a college psychiatrist:

“While I was home for vacation, my parents told me they are getting divorced. They haven’t always gotten along, so I’m not really surprised. But I am worried about my brother. He’s already depressed and on medication . Will he become suicidal ? I’m not even home to help.”

Divorce is something you do not anticipate when you get married, even though 50 percent of marriages end in divorce. Most divorces happen before seven years of marriage, while only four percent happen after 10 years. People may wait until their children go to college to maintain stability while they are growing up. Parents should never feel guilty about divorce; your child wants both their parents to be happy, which may best occur in separate households.

While many students are relieved that their parents have split up, they can simultaneously experience a shock to their system. They may be deeply concerned about the disruption this will cause to the family and finances. Who will they stay with for winter breaks? Many students get caught in the middle, hearing about the stress each parent is experiencing. Even though students are away at school, be aware that family dynamics have a big impact on college students. According to the 2023 National College Health Assessment survey, 38 percent of students had problems or challenges with family in the last year.

For students who are already experiencing depression or anxiety , their symptoms can become worse. I encourage students who have more severe forms of depression and experience suicidal thoughts to let their parents know so they can get the support they need. Many students will not inform divorcing parents that they are struggling with serious mental health problems because they worry about burdening them.

If your child has mental health issues, let them know that you are available even if you are going through a hard time. If they are overwhelmed, you might want to schedule a family therapy session. With telehealth services, this can be done even while they are away at school. Sometimes, a college counselor might invite a parent into the session with the student’s consent.

Helping Your College Student Cope With Divorce

There are many steps you can take to help your child deal with your divorce.

Encourage your college student to see a campus therapist. Therapists are experienced in helping college students navigate a recent family divorce or ongoing problems with a past divorce.
Seek your own therapist if you find yourself making your child your sounding board. It is natural that you might want to open up to your child about your experience. Your intelligent and caring college student may listen even if they are feeling overwhelmed. Leave them the space for their own growth while you work with a therapist on yours.
Prepare your child financially. Not all divorces cause disruptions in family finances, but some divorces do. Advise your child to schedule a meeting at the financial aid office if they will need to take out additional loans.
Steer your college student toward focusing on their academics, friends, and personal development.
Keep your college student’s vacation time simple: Try to make visits home stress-free. Give them the freedom to decide which parent they want to visit and for how long.

College students will be affected by family dynamics, whether they are at home or at school. At the same time, children are often very resilient . Offer your child support in the face of parent divorce while encouraging them to focus on their college experience and their future. Reassure them that they and you will be OK.

Marcia Morris, M.D. , is the author of The Campus Cure: A Parent’s Guide to Mental Health and Wellness for College Students . She is a psychiatrist at the University of Florida.

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Essays About Divorce: Top 5 Examples and 7 Prompts

Essays about divorce can be challenging to write; read on to see our top essay examples and writing prompts to help you get started.

Divorce is the legal termination of a marriage. It can be a messy affair, especially if it includes children. Dividing the couple’s assets also often causes chaos when divorce proceedings are in session.

Divorce also touches and considers religion and tradition. Therefore, laws are formed depending on the country’s history, culture, and belief system.

To help you choose what you want to talk about regarding this topic, here are examples you can read to get an idea of what kind of essay you want to write.

1. Divorce Should Be Legalized in the Philippines by Ernestine Montgomery

2. to divorce or not to divorce by mark ghantous, 3. what if you mess up by manis friedman, 4. divorce: a life-changing experience by writer louie, 5. divorce’s effects on early adult relationships by percy massey, 1. the major reasons for divorce, 2. why i support divorce, 3. my divorce experience, 4. how to avoid divorce, 5. divorce and its effects on my family, 6. the consequences of divorce, 7. divorce laws around the world.

“What we need is a divorce law that defines clearly and unequivocally the grounds and terms for terminating a marriage… Divorce is a choice and we all should have the freedom to make choices… in cases where a union is more harmful than beneficial, a divorce can be benevolent and less hurtful way of severing ties with your partner.”

As the title suggests, Montgomery and his other colleagues discuss why the Philippines, a predominantly Catholic country, needs to allow divorce. Then, to strengthen his argument, he mentions that Spain, the root of Christianity, and Italy, where the Vatican City is, administer divorce.

He also mentions bills, relevant figures, and statistics to make his case in favor of divorce more compelling. Montgomery adds that people who want a divorce don’t necessarily mean they want to marry again, citing other motives such as abuse and marital failure.

“Divorce, being the final step in a detrimental marriage, brings upon the gruesome decision as to whether a married couple wishes to end that once made commitment they had for each other. As opposed to the present, divorce was rare in ancient times…”

Ghantous starts his essay with what divorce means, as not only an end of a commitment but also the termination of legal duties and other obligations of the couple to each other. He then talks about divorce in ancient times, when men had superior control over women and their children. He also mentions Caroline Norton, who fought with English family law that was clearly against women.

“So even though G‑d has rules,… laws,… divine commandments, when you sin, He tells you: ‘You messed up? Try again.’ That’s exactly how you should be married — by treating your spouse the way G‑d treats you. With that much mercy and compassion, that much kindness and consideration.”

Friedman’s essay discusses how the Torah sees marriage and divorce and explains it by recounting a scene with his daughters where they couldn’t follow a recipe. He includes good treatment and forgiveness necessary in spouses. But he also explains that God understands and doesn’t want people in a failed marriage to continue hurting. You might also be interested in these essays about commitment .

“Depending on the reasons that led up to the divorce the effects can vary… I was fourteen years old and the one child that suffered the most emotional damage… My parents did not discuss their reasons for the divorce with me, they didn’t have to, and I knew the reasons.”

The author starts the essay by citing the famous marital promise: “For better or worse, for richer or poorer,” before going in-depth regarding the divorce rate among Americans. He further expounds on how common divorce is, including its legalities. Although divorce has established legal grounds, it doesn’t consider the emotional trauma it will cause, especially for children.

Louie recounts how his life changed when his dad moved out, listing why his parents divorced. He ends the essay by saying society is at fault for commercializing divorce as if it’s the only option.

“With divorce becoming more prevalent, many researchers have taken it upon themselves to explore many aspects of this topic such as evolving attitudes, what causes divorce, and how it effects the outcome of children’s lives.”

Massey examines the causes of divorce and how it impacts children’s well-being by citing many relevant research studies. Some of the things he mentions are the connection between the child’s mental health, behavioral issues, and future relationships. Another is the trauma a child can endure during the divorce proceedings.

He also mentions that some children who had a broken family put marriage on a pedestal. As a result, they do their best to create a better future family and treat their children better.

Top 7 Prompts on Essays About Divorce

After adding to your knowledge about the subject, you’re better prepared to write essays about divorce.

There are many causes of the dissolution of marriage, and many essays have already discussed these reasons. However, you can explain these reasons differently. For example, you can focus on domestic abuse, constant fighting, infidelity, financial issues, etc.

If you want to make your piece stand out, you can include your personal experience, but only if you’re comfortable sharing your story with others.

If you believe divorce offers a better life for all parties involved, list these benefits and explain them. Then, you can focus on a specific pro of legalizing divorce, such as getting out of an abusive relationship.

If you want to write an essay to argue against the negative effects of divorce, here’s an excellent guide on how to write an argumentative essay .

This prompt is not only for anyone who has no or sole guardian. If you want to write about the experiences of a child raised by other people or who lives with a single parent, you can interview a friend or anyone willing to talk about their struggles and triumphs even if they didn’t have a set of parents.

Aside from reasons for divorce, you can talk about what makes these reasons more probable. Then, analyze what steps couples can take to avoid it. Such as taking couples’ therapy, weekly family get-together, etc. To make your essay more valuable, weigh in on what makes these tips effective.

Essays About Divorce: Divorce and its effects on my family

Divorce is diverse and has varying effects. There are many elements to its results, and no two sets of factors are precisely the same for two families.

If you have an intimate experience of how your immediate and extended family dynamic had been affected by divorce, narrate those affairs. Include what it made you and the others around you feel. You might also be interested in these essays about conflict .

This is a broad prompt, but you can narrow it down by focusing on an experience you or a close friend had. You can also interview someone closely related to a divorce case, such as a lawyer, reporter, or researcher.

If you don’t have any experience with divorce, do not know anyone who had to go through it, or is more interested in its legal aspects, compiles different divorce laws for each country. You can even add a brief history for each law to make the readers understand how they came about.

Are you looking for other topics to write on? Check out our general resource of essay writing topics .

Maria Caballero is a freelance writer who has been writing since high school. She believes that to be a writer doesn't only refer to excellent syntax and semantics but also knowing how to weave words together to communicate to any reader effectively.

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It’s college application time and parents across the state are praying for the essay fairy to arrive and save them. Having gone through it twice, I am sympathetic to all of those who are now going through what is a rite of indoctrination in parenting. Then, just when you think you get a break, now you have to figure out how to pay for it!

Even though those acceptance letters won’t be in the mail until April (unless your student is applying early action, or to a school with rolling admissions), it’s not too soon to start thinking about it. This takes on a whole other level of stress when you are divorced or separated from your child’s other parent.

New Jersey law clearly provides that a divorced or separated parent’s obligation extends to higher education. Unlike our neighbor to the west, support does not stop after high school when a child has the capacity to attend college, or a trade school. Not only is there an obligation to contribute towards college, child support does not end when your child goes off to the dorms. It may change, but it does not end.

Help your child choose schools to apply to.

Like a kid at an ice cream sundae bar, your child’s appetite for college may be more than you can eat. When those glossy brochures and exciting emails come from private universities and your child is wide eyed, now is the time to manage expectations. As one example, George Washington University is $70,443 per year (including room and board).

If your child is not going to qualify for significant financial aid or scholarships, and you can’t afford what you reasonably think may be your share, don’t encourage your child to apply. It can only lead to heartache on the part of your child, and in some cases, a court order that can be financially devastating.

Several years ago, I was involved in a case in which the father encouraged his daughter to apply to his Alma matter – a small school with a big price tag. She applied, was accepted, and then he realized he could not afford it. The judge held that he had to contribute a portion that was equal to his proportionate share of the combined income of him and his ex-wife regardless of the fact that it was crippling to his finances. The court notes that the father had been involved in encouraging the child to visit, and apply to the school.

Another issue to consider is whether this is the first child to attend college. Are there brothers and sisters coming up from behind? Prospective obligations for other children are valid issues to consider. Now is the time to manage expectations.

To be sure, your ex may not agree with your opinion as to what is and what is not affordable. This is not the time to be a shrinking violet, whichever side of the argument you are on. Make your position known, in writing, so you can defend it later.

How much will you have to pay for college after a divorce?

This answer may depend on your settlement agreement if you were divorced, or have some type of agreement with your child’s other parent. If there is no agreement, current New Jersey law mandates that the following factors be taken into consideration:

Whether the parent, if still living with the child, would have contributed toward the costs of the requested higher education;

The effect of the background, values, and goals of the parent on the reasonableness of the expectation of the child for higher education;

The amount of the contribution sought by the child for the cost of higher education;

The ability of the parent to pay that cost;

The relationship of the requested contribution to the kind of school or course of study sought by the child;

The financial resources of both parents;

The commitment to and aptitude of the child for the requested education;

The financial resources of the child, including assets owned individually or held in custodianship or trust;

The ability of the child to earn income during the school year or on vacation;

The availability of financial aid in the form of college grants and loans;

The child’s relationship to the paying parent, including mutual affection and shared goals as well as responsiveness to parental advice and guidance; and,

The relationship of the education requested to any prior training and to the overall long-range goals of the child.

What about child support while your child is living in that fancy dorm?

Even though your child may be living in a dorm and eating gourmet like meals that are far better than the mystery meat you may have had in college, a payor of child support will still likely have to pay some level of support. For starters, even though the custodial parent is not giving the child dinner every night, the rent or mortgage and tax payment has not changed. While the water bill may go down, the custodial parent still has to heat the same size house that has the child’s room, and still has to pay for the auto insurance. Moreover, the child still needs clothes, toiletries, haircuts, and the like.

In some cases, courts have recognized that the needs of the child may even go up when they go away to school. If the child support was being calculated pursuant to the New Jersey Child Support Guidelines, the guidelines no longer apply when a child goes away to school for the determination of the amount of child support that is payable.

The factors and expenses in addition to the ones I have already mentioned which have to be considered include: transportation (possible automobile maintenance or payments, gasoline, parking, or alternate travel expenses); furniture (such as lamps, shelves, or dorm set-up and small appliances); clothing; linens and bedding; luggage; telephone; supplies (like paper, pens, markers, or calculators); sundries (such as cleaning supplies or laundry detergent); toiletries (soap, shampoo, and other personal hygiene necessaries); insurance (automobile, health, and personal property); entertainment for college events and organizations; and spending money.

This is all considered against the actual college costs that the parent is paying, as well as any reasonable contribution that the student should make from sources such as summer jobs, savings, co-ops, and work study programs.

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Divorce and its Impacts on Family Members Cause and Effect Essay

Introduction, impacts of divorce, how divorced spouses cope with the divorce.

Divorce has become a common aspect of our society. Current divorce statistics have been estimated to be 50% in America. This portrays a society where people are moving from a situation where family institutions were used as refugees and comfort zones to a one where they are viewed as a place of doom and suffering.

We cannot deny that divorce has devastating and far reaching effects than we are ready to admit. This paper looks into the impacts of divorce to the various members of the broken marriage, and how they try to live through it.

The effects of divorce are experienced by each and every member of the family regardless of who was at fault.

“The effects of divorce can change virtually every aspect of a person’s life including where a person lives, with whom they live with, their standard of living, their emotional happiness, their assets and liabilities, time spent with children and other family…” (eJustice 2002),

Effects of divorce to couples themselves

Even though the couple is the author of the outcome of the marriage, it does not affect them any less. The effects are on all aspects of life i.e., socially, financially, and psychologically.

Socially, individuals relations with the outside is influenced by the persons failed marriage. “Divorced individuals generally experience more social isolation and have smaller social networks than do married individuals” (Henley & Parsley, 2011).

This may result from self pity and feelings of inadequacy that may be developed by the individual in question. Further, there are societies where divorced people are viewed as failures and are allocated a lower social standing as compared to married people. In such traditional societies, divorced people and especially women are not allowed to remarry. So they may end up spending their lives in solitude and unhappy.

Moreover, even where it is completely allowed to remarry, “remarriages are less stable than first marriages…Therefore; divorce appears to influence future marital relationships, making them less stable and more vulnerable to dissolution” (Henley & Parsley, 2011).

Economically, a person’s normal life is disrupted and normally one of the couple may have to establish a home elsewhere, which requires funds. Further, divorce legal proceedings can be quite expensive, to hire lawyers and paying witnesses not to mention countless hours spent in courtrooms. In addition, the property accumulated during the subsistence of the marriage is ordinarily split up between the couple and these lowers the standards of living from both ends.

Sometimes, a couple may be unable to obtain judicial help in determining property ownership leaving weaker party, especially women, under the mercy of the other couple. This normally causes unfairness where the party refuses to divide the property in his possession fairy, not to mention hiding some of the property, leaving the other party financially starved.

Researchers have reached a conclusion that there is a disparity between the economic situation of women and that of men after divorce, with women generally being on the lower edge while men experiencing an economic upsurge (Braver and O’Connell 1998).

Psychologically, research has revealed that divorced people portray higher rates of anxiety and depression, low self-esteem and psychological instability, with those having more than one divorce experiences exhibiting more of these tendencies as compared to those with one.

Researchers has it that those who stay married, even though they were unhappy before, are likely to be happier five years later in the marriage as opposed to those who opted for divorce (Waite & Gallagher 2000, P. 148).

The psychological impact causes health implications to the couple. It has been shown that both spouses will greatly suffer a decline in mental health but this may affect women more than men. Further, a couple diagnosed with a terminal illness is more likely to recover within the marriage as compared to a divorced individual (Goodwin et al 1987, P. 3125-3130).

This shows that there are deeper issues associated with divorce besides the financial hurdles and social effects.

Impacts to Children

Divorce has profound implications on the children of the marriage. This is regardless of whether they are adult children or otherwise. Study has shown that divorce has serious implications on development of children and affects their future relationships. These effects may be discussed in terms of what the child has to lose resulting from the divorce. These may include such things as economic loss, lack of parental care and other social disruptions.

Economically, since children are moving from an institution where there are two breadwinners to, in most cases, one-breadwinner family it is normal that the financial status will have to be adjusted to suite the new family setting. This will mean cutting costs to incorporate all the needs of the family to the now constrained family budget.

In extreme cases, where the single parent is unemployed and without a stable source of income, the children may be forced to survive without basic necessities. It has been established that, “[children] in single-parent families have less than one-third the median per capita income of kids from two-parent families, and half of them fall below the poverty line in any given year, compared with 10% of their counterparts in intact families” (Magnet 1992, p 43)

Parental factor has various aspects to it. First of all, divorced parents will no longer live together. The children who were used to being with both parents will have to live with one of them. Adjusting to these new casual relationships between parents may pose problems to most children.

Mostly the children grow up without having the fatherly input in their lives. For children below 5 years, “sleep disturbances and an exacerbated fear of separation from the custodial parent are common. There is usually a great deal of yearning for the non-custodial parent” (Eleoff 2003).

It was concluded that youth of around 20 years still carry around with them painful memories ten years after their parents’ divorce. Billings and Emery (2000) among the things that still weigh down on them is the loss of the relationship with their fathers.

Further, the parent bestowed with the custody of the children may not be very effective on his/her own on the over burdened parental obligation. It could be the ordinary imperfections of a parent or it could have arisen from the after-effects of the divorce process. As argued out before, the psychological stability of the parent may be in question, and this is transmitted to the children, albeit unknowingly.

“In the wake of a divorce, most custodial mothers exhibit varying degrees of disorganization, anger, decreased expectations for appropriate social behavior of their children, and a reduction of the ability of parents to separate the child’s needs and actions from those of the adult” (Eleoff 2003).

The other issue on parents is the fact that, after divorce, parents will remarry and the children will have a different set of parents, step parents. Obviously, the step family will not function as naturally as a normal family does.

More often than not, there will be conflicts of loyalties between step parent and biological parent for the child. “Evidence suggests that each change in parenting arrangements represents a risk factor, thus increasing the likelihood that a child will react negatively to their post-divorce environment”(Demo & Supple 2011).

Social disruptions involve such things as moving houses, changing schools and having adapting new and very different surrounding for the child. Sometimes, it means that the new surroundings are worse off than the one the child is used to. This may be due to financial strains on the single parent.

Study has shown that, constant moving for children of single parent families, increased school drop-outs and chances of unplanned pregnancies. (Crowder and Teachman 2004)

When these children move from their original home and schools, they lose their friends and are forced to start all over again in life, a situation that most children have a problem adjusting to.

Overall, children experience such internal and emotional conflicts as low self-esteem, unfamiliarity to the new surroundings and set of parents, feelings of rejection especially from the parent who is not living with them and feelings of hopelessness and insecurity.

Despite the devastating impacts of a divorce, all the members have to find a way of surviving the divorce. Some of the factors that help family members cope may be economical, social or personal factors.

Personal factors have to do with the personal attributes that are specific to an individual. They include such matters as age, level of education, financial security and psychological stability. Research shows that older people are less likely to cope with a divorce as compared to younger people owing to their impaired chances of remarriage and due the comfort they have established in the marriage all those years.

Also, a person who is financially stable will be more likely to adjust to new family set-up as opposed to people who are unemployed. This is made stronger by the now widely adopted principle of property settlement between spouses, which requires a 50-50 property division. This ensures that both spouses’ living standards are least affected by the divorce.

Also, parties will seek to establish new social networks for support. Some spouses will start new romantic relationships or even remarry so as to forget their former spouses as well as help in the hardships of day to day living.

Divorce is a horrible ordeal to go through. The post-divorce experiences are beyond devastation, both to the members of the family involved and to the society at large. Parties should try to resolve their disputes before rushing for divorce and it should only be a last resort.

Many studies have been done on the level divorce with statistics showing that they are currently very high. However, there hasn’t been conclusive research on what are the causes of this rapidly increasing pandemic or even on how it could be stopped.

Therefore, future studies should concentrate more on how we can combine efforts to reduce the occurrence of more divorces. It is a duty and responsibility of each and every member of the society to uphold and protect the sanctity of the institution of the marriage.

Braver, S. L and O’Connell, D. (1998) Divorced Dads: Shattering the Myths. New York: Putnam.

Billings, L & Emery, R. E. (2000). Distress among young adults in divorced families: Journal of Family Psychology , 14, 671-687.

Crowder, K & Teachman, J. (2004). Do residential conditions explain the relationship between living arrangements and adolescent behavior? Journal of Marriage and Family , 66, 721-738.

Demo,H.D& Supple,A.J. (2011). Divorce – Effects On Children, Effects On Couples, Effects On Parents: Effects On Children : Retrieved from https://family.jrank.org/pages/413/Divorce.html#ixzz1RKIAMjFY

Eleoff, S. (2003). An Exploration of the Ramifications of Divorce on Children and Adolescent: The Pennsylvania, State University College of Medicine eJustice.

Goodwin, S et al. (1987). The Effect of Marital Status on Stage, Treatment, and Survival of Cancer Patients; Journal of the American Medical Association 258: 3125-3130.

Henley, K & Pasley, K. (2011). Divorce- Effects On Children, Effects On Couples, Effects On Parents: Effects on couples. Retrieved from https://family.jrank.org/pages/413/Divorce.html#ixzz1RKIAMjFY

Magnet, M. (1992). The American Family : Fortune 10 Aug: 42-47.

Waite, L & Gallagher, M. ( 2000). The Case for Marriage. New York: Doubleday p.148.

Chicago (A-D)
Chicago (N-B)

IvyPanda. (2023, December 13). Divorce and its Impacts on Family Members. https://ivypanda.com/essays/divorce-and-its-impacts-on-family-members/

"Divorce and its Impacts on Family Members." IvyPanda , 13 Dec. 2023, ivypanda.com/essays/divorce-and-its-impacts-on-family-members/.

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Bibliography

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Persuasive & Argumentative Essays about Divorce: Free Tips

A divorce is a life-changing experience that affects spouses and their children (if there are any). Since divorce rates are relatively high in modern society, more and more people face this problem nowadays.

Our specialists will write a custom essay specially for you!

When you are assigned to compose an argumentative essay about divorce, you should be as careful as possible. Remember that the split-up of marriage can be a painful experience for everyone involved.

The article will give you useful advice on how to write an outstanding paper on the topic. Learn the essential features of the following types:

persuasive essay about divorce,
for and against essay,
causes and effects of divorce essay,

Check tips from Custom-writing.org below and write the best paper!

💍 How to Write It
📂 Essays by Type
✒ Causes and Effects

✍️ Divorce Essay Topics

💍 how to write a divorce essay.

The general structure of essays on divorce is quite common:

introduction;
conclusion.

Yet, there are some variations of what info to include in the body, depending on the essay type. The following structure is applicable for divorce argumentative essay. To learn about the features of other types, keep on reading our article.

Just in 1 hour! We will write you a plagiarism-free paper in hardly more than 1 hour

Argumentative divorce essays are composed according to the standard structure:

1. Thesis Statement about Divorce

A divorce essay introduction isn’t anything extraordinary as you have to introduce your topic and position.

You should always give broad information about the issue and state the main problems you will discuss in your writing.
Make a general statement about the consequences of divorce or the common divorce effects on people.
Then write your thesis statement on divorce. Clearly explain to the audience the topic you’re going to discuss and your position on that topic. In case you find this task difficult, try using a thesis generator for argumentative essay . This will save you some time.

That’s it! Now your divorce essay introduction is ready.

What’s next?

2. Main Body

This section presents all of your ideas and arguments related to the topic of divorce.

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Here you can write about the adverse effects of divorce on children or the most common reasons people divorce.
Use compelling arguments and support your ideas with examples.

There are tons of surveys and statistics about divorce on the internet, so it won’t be too challenging to gather the information you need.

3. Conclusion

In the last paragraph, you have to sum up your paper and leave a final expression.

Summarize every idea presented in your divorce essay.
Restate your thesis statement on divorce, relying on your reasoning.
Then list your concluding thoughts on this topic.

Make your sentences clear and easy to follow. Use synonyms to improve your writing style. Such an approach will help you convince the readers and express your thoughts better.

📂 Divorce Essays by Type

The content and reasoning of each paper on divorce depend primarily on the type of essay . See the following sections to understand how to write each of them.

Here are a few types you can consider:

Get an originally-written paper according to your instructions!

Argumentative Essay about Divorce

When it comes to divorce, there are many disputable topics—for example, the reasons people separate or its impact on children. It’s easy to find support and statistics for both issues. And you’ll need them as facts are a crucial part of a divorce argumentative essay.

As a starting point:

Research your idea and choose a side to support. Make sure that among all argumentative essay topics about divorce, you selected the most interesting for yourself. In your thesis statement, concisely express your position, so the reader can quickly get it.

Then, start writing the entire essay. Regardless of what type of paper you are writing—anti or pro divorce argumentative essay—your writing should meet these requirements:

Base your points on logic;
Present both sides of the arguments, but support only one;
Take into consideration counterclaims;
Support all the arguments by valid evidence;
Use a calm, informative tone.

Don’t forget to incorporate quotes and figures to convince your readers.

Persuasive Essay about Divorce

What is the goal of writing persuasive essays ? It’s to convince your reader that your position on a particular problem is true.

Therefore, writing this paper means that you should identify an individual problem related to the topic. In the introduction of your persuasive essay about divorce, you should choose your side and deliver it to the reader.

Crucial note:

Similarly to an argumentative essay, you have to provide credible facts to support your position. Yet here, you use them to back up your opinion and persuade your reader.

While composing your persuasive essay about the legalization of divorce, remember its distinctive features:

Based on emotions;
Presents only one side of the argument;
Ignores counterclaims;
The tone is dynamic, emotionally-charged, and aggressive to some extent.

Cause and Effect Essay on Divorce

Whether it concerns old parents or a young couple, divorce typically has the same causes and effects. You can often see them clearly, even in books or movies.

The essay outline for the causes and effects of divorce essay is quite common:

Introduction.

In your divorce essay introduction, provide a general background and compose a clear thesis statement. For example, your thesis might look like this:

A divorce, caused by the spouses’ expectations mismatch, results in a lack of communication between children and one of the parents.

In this part of your essay, investigate the cause and effect of divorce, you stated before.

For the given thesis, the main points would be the following:

The primary cause of divorce is the mismatch in the spouses’ expectations from the marriage.

The divorce often results in a lack of children’s interactions with one of the parents.

Conclusion.

Synthesize all of your arguments and give your audience a space for a further investigation of your issue.

Narrative Essay about Divorce

If your assignment is to write a family essay, you can choose from a wide range of topics. For this purpose, a marriage essay or a divorce essay would be perfect.

In a short paper about your family, it isn’t easy to cover many topics. So choose only one.

Look through some narrative essay topics and select the one you like:

The story of my divorce: how did I decide to break up with my spouse?
My life completely changed after my parents divorced.
How my life looked like before the divorce with my wife/husband and how it looks now.
The way divorce destroys healthy communication between children and parents in my family.

For and Against Divorce Essay

As you know, both the negative and positive effects of divorce are disputable, making them appealing to discuss. There are many recent studies and relevant statistical data on the topic to help you write such an essay.

This topic would also be great for a speech on divorce.

Wondering what are the for and against divorce arguments? Take a look at the following:

✒ Divorce: Causes and Effects

We have a pleasant bonus for you! Below, you can find useful arguments and insightful ideas that you can use in your papers on divorce. Apply our concepts in any type of essay, adjusting them to your topic.

Divorce essays can cover the following issues:

Generally Known Facts on Divorces

When covering this issue in your persuasive essay on divorce, you will have to cover the problem altogether. Include the common marriage problems that psychologists all over the world study. Use their statistical data on divorces when crafting your argument.

Divorce is quite a broad topic, and you may want to narrow it down. With so much information available, you could write a research paper on divorce without any difficulty.

Statistical Data on Divorces

Good divorce essays should include enough statistical data. It will add more scientific value and reveal your research abilities. Besides, facts and figures present many exciting topics to comment on.

For example:

You can do significant research concerning divorce causes and consequences. Draw a contrast between divorce in several countries, or examine the age and education of people who officially separate more often.

Reasons for Divorces

What does an essay on divorce mean without discussion of its reasons?

Find out different sociologists’ viewpoints on the reasons for divorces. Then underline the cause you consider to be the most truthful one.

You can also provide your own theory on the grounds for divorces in your persuasive essay on divorce. The key point is to prove the accuracy of your statement.

Divorce Prevention Ideas

If there is a problem, there must be some solution. So, think of the possible ways to make a marriage work.

Investigate divorce causes from a scientific point of view. Examine the primary studies that reveal why people actually break up. Also, discuss the precautions that can help married couples avoid significant conflicts.

Effects of Divorce on Children

Parents sometimes forget that their divorce isn’t only about them but also about their children. It causes psychological problems for kids, which you can classify in your paper. Don’t forget to add some statistical data on divorce to support your arguments.

Every child reacts differently to their parents’ breakup. It’s a rare case when divorce consequences are positive, making the effects on kids an urgent topic to discuss.

Positive Effects of Divorce

Sometimes divorce isn’t a catastrophe but rather the only way to heal wounds and begin a new life. Often, people don’t recognize that they need to change their lives for the better. This situation is primarily related to abusive marriages or those with regular cheating.

In these cases, the positive effects of divorce may seem easy to understand. However, psychologists have to make great efforts to persuade people to end their relationships. Write a paper making this same argument.

Negative outcomes of divorce on children .
Connection between divorce and antisocial behavior of children.
Family crises and the issue it causes: divorce, remarriage, stepparents, adoption.
Effect of divorce on teenagers ’ academic performance.
Causes and consequences of divorce .
What can be done to decrease divorce rates in America ?
Does parental divorce affect the rates of juvenile delinquency ?
The most widespread reasons for divorce .
Analyze marital success factors and Gottman’s predictors of divorce.
Impact of divorce on child’s mental health .
Change of divorce law throughout history.
Positive and negative changes in children’s behavior after divorce.
Divorce : a disaster or a benefit?
Is cheating one of the main reasons of divorce?
Gender stratification impact on divorce trends.
Effect of divorce on family relationship .
Do divorced parents change their child-rearing styles ?
List of factors typically associated with higher divorce rates .
The support required for all the members of divorced and single-parent families .
Analyze the reasons for high divorce rates .
Does divorce only impact adolescent in a bad way?
Effect of poverty on divorce rates.
Specifics of divorce in the UAE .
Does divorce lead to depression ?
Family therapy and its role in decreasing divorce rates.
The impact of divorce on children-parents relationship.
Evaluation of child custody in divorce proceedings.
How to manage the stress of divorce.
Effect of divorce on children’s self-esteem.
How to minimize the devastating consequences of divorce .
Addiction as the reason for divorce.
Effective communication in marriage and its role in preventing divorce.
Divorce as the only way out of an abusive relationship .
Financial issues of divorce and how to overcome them.
Parental support is the best way to help children to go through divorce .
How do adolescents adjust to parental divorce?
Do boys and girls react to the parental divorce the same way?
Social media can destroy relationship and lead to divorce.
Can Christian counseling help couples to resolve their issues and avoid divorce?
Poverty among divorced women.
Young marriage has more chances to break-up.
Respect is the best way to get marriage satisfaction and avoid divorce.
Is interfaith marriage doomed to divorce?
Why a successful marriage may end in divorce?
Marriage contract will help to facilitate the legal side of divorce process.
Reduction of the number of divorces .
Personal development after divorce.
How family relationships influence future marriage and divorce chances of children.
Child support in case of marriage divorce.
Will lack of family and work balance definitely result in divorce?

If you are stuck on writing, you can always ask us for help! Whether you need a persuasive essay on divorce or any other paper, we are here and ready to assist.

Thanks for reading the article! Share it with friends who may need our tips or assistance.

🔗 References

Essay Introductions
Transitional Words and Phrases
Argumentative Paper Format
The Writing Process
Divorce Argument Essay: Bartleby
Cause and Effect Essay: The Online Writing Lab (OWL) at Roane State Community College and UNC at Chapel Hill Writing Center
Counterargument: Gordon Harvey, the Writing Center at Harvard University
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Wow! Thanks for this! This will help me on my speech topic a lot! Thank you Jack‼️

Hi, Caresse! Thank you for the feedback. Glad you found the post helpful! Come back for more 🙂

Glad you enjoyed reading the post!

Is it a bad idea to talk about family problems in your essays?

For the essay about describing the environment in which you were raised, I am considering talking about my parents’ divorce. Their divorce is the biggest thing that has happened in my life, and I wouldn’t be who I am today if it wasn’t for it. The main thing that I am struggling with is how I’d organize the essay. Does anyone have any tips? I’d really like to share specific ideas with someone, but I’m not sure who would be a good person to go to. Thanks!

“I wouldn’t be who I am today if it wasn’t for it”

This is what you need to focus on. How have you behaved differently (specific example(s)) than you would have without having gone through this? These should be positive things.

The general consensus here seems to be that, if you want to PM specifics to someone, choose an adult with posting history. I am a college freshman, so that would leave me out.

You certainly could discuss your parents’ divorce, but about 50% of all marriages end in divorce. Maybe you could try focusing on something else unique about your upbringing?

Keep it about you, not the marriage/divorce. Can you think of an instance when you were affected and describe how you felt and what you came away with from processing that? Maybe a time when you wanted to share something with both of them but we’re with just one, when you were jealous of a new partner, took responsibility for a sibling, had to adjust to s new BF/gf/stepsibling, or learned something surprising about them, etc. Most of the really effective essays I have read revolve around one other two events, often mundane, that allow for some personal history to be revealed in the course of providing context.

I would try writing a couple of essays. Don’t worry about perfection. You’ll be surprised at what starts to come out and feel right.

^^ Exactly!!!

Lots and lots of kids have parents who have gotten divorced. But none of them shared your exact experience.

Instead of the big topic: DIVORCE, find one small example that illustrates what you learned: the time you got a flat tire and realized that dad wasn’t home anymore, and that you were going to have to change your own flat… that sort of thing. It’s not about your parent’s divorce, but about what you’ve learned about yourself as a result.

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Should college essays touch on race? Some feel affirmative action ruling leaves no choice

When the supreme court ended affirmative action in higher education, it left the college essay as one of few places where race can play a role in admissions..

Hillary Amofa listens to others member of the Lincoln Park High School step team after...

By The Associated Press

5:20 AM on Mar 28, 2024 CDT

CHICAGO — When she started writing her college essay, Hillary Amofa told the story she thought admissions offices wanted to hear. About being the daughter of immigrants from Ghana and growing up in a small apartment in Chicago. About hardship and struggle.

Then she deleted it all.

“I would just find myself kind of trauma-dumping,” said the 18-year-old senior at Lincoln Park High School in Chicago. “And I’m just like, this doesn’t really say anything about me as a person.”

When the Supreme Court ended affirmative action in higher education, it left the college essay as one of few places where race can play a role in admissions decisions. For many students of color, instantly more was riding on the already high-stakes writing assignment. Some say they felt pressure to exploit their hardships as they competed for a spot on campus.

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Related: Gov. Abbott issues executive order fighting antisemitism at Texas colleges

Amofa was just starting to think about her essay when the court issued its decision, and it left her with a wave of questions. Could she still write about her race? Could she be penalized for it? She wanted to tell colleges about her heritage but she didn’t want to be defined by it.

In English class, Amofa and her classmates read sample essays that all seemed to focus on some trauma or hardship. It left her with the impression she had to write about her life’s hardest moments to show how far she’d come. But she and some of her classmates wondered if their lives had been hard enough to catch the attention of admissions offices.

“For a lot of students, there’s a feeling of, like, having to go through something so horrible to feel worthy of going to school, which is kind of sad,” said Amofa, the daughter of a hospital technician and an Uber driver.

Hillary Amofa (second from left), practices with members of the Lincoln Park High School...

This year’s senior class is the first in decades to navigate college admissions without affirmative action. The Supreme Court upheld the practice in decisions going back to the 1970s, but this court’s conservative supermajority found it is unconstitutional for colleges to give students extra weight because of their race alone.

Still, the decision left room for race to play an indirect role: Chief Justice John Roberts wrote universities can still consider how an applicant’s life was shaped by their race, “so long as that discussion is concretely tied to a quality of character or unique ability.”

“A benefit to a student who overcame racial discrimination, for example, must be tied to that student’s courage and determination,” he wrote.

Scores of colleges responded with new essay prompts asking about students’ backgrounds. Brown University asked applicants how “an aspect of your growing up has inspired or challenged you.” Rice University asked students how their perspectives were shaped by their “background, experiences, upbringing, and/or racial identity.”

Do schools ‘expect a sob story’?

When Darrian Merritt started writing his essay, he knew the stakes were higher than ever because of the court’s decision. His first instinct was to write about events that led to him going to live with his grandmother as a child.

Those were painful memories, but he thought they might play well at schools like Yale, Stanford and Vanderbilt.

“I feel like the admissions committee might expect a sob story or a tragic story,” said Merritt, a senior in Cleveland. “And if you don’t provide that, then maybe they’re not going to feel like you went through enough to deserve having a spot at the university. I wrestled with that a lot.”

Related: Texas colleges risk millions if they break DEI ban, lawmaker says

He wrote drafts focusing on his childhood, but it never amounted to more than a collection of memories. Eventually he abandoned the idea and aimed for an essay that would stand out for its positivity.

Merritt wrote about a summer camp where he started to feel more comfortable in his own skin. He described embracing his personality and defying his tendency to please others. The essay had humor — it centered on a water gun fight where he had victory in sight but, in a comedic twist, slipped and fell. But the essay also reflects on his feelings of not being “Black enough” and getting made fun of for listening to “white people music.”

“I was like, ‘OK, I’m going to write this for me, and we’re just going to see how it goes,’” he said. “It just felt real, and it felt like an honest story.”

The essay describes a breakthrough as he learned “to take ownership of myself and my future by sharing my true personality with the people I encounter. ... I realized that the first chapter of my own story had just been written.”

Ruling prompts pivots on essay topics

Like many students, Max Decker of Portland, Ore., had drafted a college essay on one topic, only to change direction after the Supreme Court ruling in June.

Decker initially wrote about his love for video games. In a childhood surrounded by constant change, navigating his parents’ divorce, the games he took from place to place on his Nintendo DS were a source of comfort.

But the essay he submitted to colleges focused on the community he found through Word is Bond, a leadership group for young Black men in Portland.

Max Decker, a senior at Lincoln High School in Portland, Ore., sits Wednesday, March 20,...

As the only biracial, Jewish kid with divorced parents in a predominantly white, Christian community, Decker wrote he constantly felt like the odd one out. On a trip with Word is Bond to Capitol Hill, he and friends who looked just like him shook hands with lawmakers. The experience, he wrote, changed how he saw himself.

“It’s because I’m different that I provide something precious to the world, not the other way around,” he wrote.

As a first-generation college student, Decker thought about the subtle ways his peers seemed to know more about navigating the admissions process. They made sure to get into advanced classes at the start of high school, and they knew how to secure glowing letters of recommendation.

If writing about race would give him a slight edge and show admissions officers a fuller picture of his achievements, he wanted to take that small advantage.

His first memory about race, Decker said, was when he went to get a haircut in elementary school and the barber made rude comments about his curly hair. Until recently, the insecurity that moment created led him to keep his hair buzzed short.

Related: Dallas approves more than $30 million in contracts to improve sidewalks citywide

Through Word is Bond, Decker said he found a space to explore his identity as a Black man. It was one of the first times he was surrounded by Black peers and saw Black role models. It filled him with a sense of pride in his identity. No more buzzcut.

The pressure to write about race involved a tradeoff with other important things in his life, Decker said. That included his passion for journalism, like the piece he wrote on efforts to revive a once-thriving Black neighborhood in Portland. In the end, he squeezed in 100 characters about his journalism under the application’s activities section.

“My final essay, it felt true to myself. But the difference between that and my other essay was the fact that it wasn’t the truth that I necessarily wanted to share,” said Decker, whose top college choice is Tulane, in New Orleans, because of the region’s diversity. “It felt like I just had to limit the truth I was sharing to what I feel like the world is expecting of me.”

Spelling out the impact of race

Before the Supreme Court ruling, it seemed a given to Imani Laird that colleges would consider the ways that race had touched her life. But now, she felt like she had to spell it out.

As she started her essay, she reflected on how she had faced bias or felt overlooked as a Black student in predominantly white spaces.

There was the year in math class when the teacher kept calling her by the name of another Black student. There were the comments that she’d have an easier time getting into college because she was Black.

Related: Federal appeals court questions legality of Texas immigration law

“I didn’t have it easier because of my race,” said Laird, a senior at Newton South High School in the Boston suburbs who was accepted at Wellesley and Howard University, and is waiting to hear from several Ivy League colleges. “I had stuff I had to overcome.”

In her final essays, she wrote about her grandfather, who served in the military but was denied access to GI Bill benefits because of his race.

She described how discrimination fueled her ambition to excel and pursue a career in public policy.

“So, I never settled for mediocrity,” she wrote. “Regardless of the subject, my goal in class was not just to participate but to excel. Beyond academics, I wanted to excel while remembering what started this motivation in the first place.”

Will schools lose racial diversity?

Amofa used to think affirmative action was only a factor at schools like Harvard and Yale. After the court’s ruling, she was surprised to find that race was taken into account even at some public universities she was applying to.

Now, without affirmative action, she wondered if mostly white schools will become even whiter.

It’s been on her mind as she chooses between Indiana University and the University of Dayton, both of which have relatively few Black students. When she was one of the only Black students in her grade school, she could fall back on her family and Ghanaian friends at church. At college, she worries about loneliness.

“That’s what I’m nervous about,” she said. “Going and just feeling so isolated, even though I’m constantly around people.”

Hillary Amofa is shown at Lincoln Park High School in Chicago on Friday, March 8, 2024.

The first drafts of her essay focused on growing up in a low-income family, sharing a bedroom with her brother and grandmother. But it didn’t tell colleges about who she is now, she said.

Her final essay tells how she came to embrace her natural hair. She wrote about going to a mostly white grade school where classmates made jokes about her afro. When her grandmother sent her back with braids or cornrows, they made fun of those too.

Over time, she ignored their insults and found beauty in the styles worn by women in her life. She now runs a business doing braids and other hairstyles in her neighborhood.

“I stopped seeing myself through the lens of the European traditional beauty standards and started seeing myself through the lens that I created,” Amofa wrote.

“Criticism will persist, but it loses its power when you know there’s a crown on your head!”

By Collin Binkley, Annie Ma and Noreen Nasir of The Associated Press

The Associated Press

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Should college essays touch on race? Some feel the affirmative action ruling leaves them no choice

Hillary Amofa listens to others member of the Lincoln Park High School step team after school Friday, March 8, 2024, in Chicago. When she started writing her college essay, Amofa told the story she thought admissions offices wanted to hear. She wrote about being the daughter of immigrants from Ghana, about growing up in a small apartment in Chicago. She described hardship and struggle. Then she deleted it all. "I would just find myself kind of trauma-dumping," said the 18 year-old senior, "And I'm just like, this doesn't really say anything about me as a person." (AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast)

Hillary Amofa listens to others member of the Lincoln Park High School step team after school Friday, March 8, 2024, in Chicago. (AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast)

When the Supreme Court ended affirmative action, it left the college essay as one of few places where race can play a role in admissions decisions. (AP Video: Noreen Nasir)

Hillary Amofa listens to others member of the Lincoln Park High School step team after school Friday, March 8, 2024, in Chicago. When she started writing her college essay, Amofa told the story she thought admissions offices wanted to hear. She wrote about being the daughter of immigrants from Ghana, about growing up in a small apartment in Chicago. She described hardship and struggle. Then she deleted it all. “I would just find myself kind of trauma-dumping,” said the 18 year-old senior, “And I’m just like, this doesn’t really say anything about me as a person.” (AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast)

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Hillary Amofa, laughs as she participates in a team building game with members of the Lincoln Park High School step team after school Friday, March 8, 2024, in Chicago. When she started writing her college essay, Amofa told the story she thought admissions offices wanted to hear. She wrote about being the daughter of immigrants from Ghana, about growing up in a small apartment in Chicago. She described hardship and struggle. Then she deleted it all. “I would just find myself kind of trauma-dumping,” said the 18 year-old senior, “And I’m just like, this doesn’t really say anything about me as a person.” (AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast)

Hillary Amofa stands for a portrait after practice with members of the Lincoln Park High School step team Friday, March 8, 2024, in Chicago. When she started writing her college essay, Amofa told the story she thought admissions offices wanted to hear. She wrote about being the daughter of immigrants from Ghana, about growing up in a small apartment in Chicago. She described hardship and struggle. Then she deleted it all. “I would just find myself kind of trauma-dumping,” said the 18 year-old senior, “And I’m just like, this doesn’t really say anything about me as a person.” (AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast)

Max Decker, a senior at Lincoln High School, sits for a portrait in the school library where he often worked on writing his college essays, in Portland, Ore., Wednesday, March 20, 2024. (AP Photo/Amanda Loman)

Hillary Amofa, second from left, practices with members of the Lincoln Park High School step team after school Friday, March 8, 2024, in Chicago. When she started writing her college essay, Amofa told the story she thought admissions offices wanted to hear. She wrote about being the daughter of immigrants from Ghana, about growing up in a small apartment in Chicago. She described hardship and struggle. Then she deleted it all. “I would just find myself kind of trauma-dumping,” said the 18 year-old senior, “And I’m just like, this doesn’t really say anything about me as a person.” (AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast)

Max Decker, a senior at Lincoln High School, stands for a portrait outside of the school in Portland, Ore., Wednesday, March 20, 2024. (AP Photo/Amanda Loman)

*Hillary Amofa, reflected right, practices in a mirror with members of the Lincoln Park High School step team after school Friday, March 8, 2024, in Chicago. When she started writing her college essay, Amofa told the story she thought admissions offices wanted to hear. She wrote about being the daughter of immigrants from Ghana, about growing up in a small apartment in Chicago. She described hardship and struggle. Then she deleted it all. “I would just find myself kind of trauma-dumping,” said the 18 year-old senior, “And I’m just like, this doesn’t really say anything about me as a person.” (AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast)

Max Decker, a senior at Lincoln High School, sits for a portrait outside of the school in Portland, Ore., Wednesday, March 20, 2024. (AP Photo/Amanda Loman)

Hillary Amofa, left, practices with members of the Lincoln Park High School step team after school Friday, March 8, 2024, in Chicago. When she started writing her college essay, Amofa told the story she thought admissions offices wanted to hear. She wrote about being the daughter of immigrants from Ghana, about growing up in a small apartment in Chicago. She described hardship and struggle. Then she deleted it all. “I would just find myself kind of trauma-dumping,” said the 18 year-old senior, “And I’m just like, this doesn’t really say anything about me as a person.” (AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast)

Hillary Amofa sits for a portrait after her step team practice at Lincoln Park High School Friday, March 8, 2024, in Chicago. When she started writing her college essay, Amofa told the story she thought admissions offices wanted to hear. She wrote about being the daughter of immigrants from Ghana, about growing up in a small apartment in Chicago. She described hardship and struggle. Then she deleted it all. “I would just find myself kind of trauma-dumping,” said the 18 year-old senior, “And I’m just like, this doesn’t really say anything about me as a person.” (AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast)

FILE - Demonstrators protest outside of the Supreme Court in Washington, in this June 29, 2023 file photo, after the Supreme Court struck down affirmative action in college admissions, saying race cannot be a factor. (AP Photo/Jose Luis Magana)

CHICAGO (AP) — When she started writing her college essay, Hillary Amofa told the story she thought admissions offices wanted to hear. About being the daughter of immigrants from Ghana and growing up in a small apartment in Chicago. About hardship and struggle.

Then she deleted it all.

This year’s senior class is the first in decades to navigate college admissions without affirmative action . The Supreme Court upheld the practice in decisions going back to the 1970s, but this court’s conservative supermajority found it is unconstitutional for colleges to give students extra weight because of their race alone.

“A benefit to a student who overcame racial discrimination, for example, must be tied to that student’s courage and determination,” he wrote.

*Hillary Amofa, reflected right, practices in a mirror with members of the Lincoln Park High School step team after school Friday, March 8, 2024, in Chicago. When she started writing her college essay, Amofa told the story she thought admissions offices wanted to hear. She wrote about being the daughter of immigrants from Ghana, about growing up in a small apartment in Chicago. She described hardship and struggle. Then she deleted it all. "I would just find myself kind of trauma-dumping," said the 18 year-old senior, "And I'm just like, this doesn't really say anything about me as a person." (AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast)

Hillary Amofa, reflected right, practices in a mirror with members of the Lincoln Park High School step team after school, March 8, 2024, in Chicago. (AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast)

WONDERING IF SCHOOLS ‘EXPECT A SOB STORY’

Those were painful memories, but he thought they might play well at schools like Yale, Stanford and Vanderbilt.

“I was like, ‘OK, I’m going to write this for me, and we’re just going to see how it goes,’” he said. “It just felt real, and it felt like an honest story.”

Max Decker, a senior at Lincoln High School, sits for a portrait in the school library where he often worked on writing his college essays, in Portland, Ore., March 20, 2024. (AP Photo/Amanda Loman)

A RULING PROMPTS PIVOTS ON ESSAY TOPICS

Like many students, Max Decker of Portland, Oregon, had drafted a college essay on one topic, only to change direction after the Supreme Court ruling in June.

But the essay he submitted to colleges focused on the community he found through Word is Bond, a leadership group for young Black men in Portland.

“It’s because I’m different that I provide something precious to the world, not the other way around,” he wrote.

As a first-generation college student, Decker thought about the subtle ways his peers seemed to know more about navigating the admissions process . They made sure to get into advanced classes at the start of high school, and they knew how to secure glowing letters of recommendation.

Max Decker reads his college essay on his experience with a leadership group for young Black men. (AP Video/Noreen Nasir)

If writing about race would give him a slight edge and show admissions officers a fuller picture of his achievements, he wanted to take that small advantage.

FILE - Demonstrators protest outside of the Supreme Court in Washington, in this June 29, 2023 file photo, after the Supreme Court struck down affirmative action in college admissions, saying race cannot be a factor. (AP Photo/Jose Luis Magana)

Demonstrators protest outside of the Supreme Court in Washington, in this June 29, 2023 file photo, after the Supreme Court struck down affirmative action in college admissions, saying race cannot be a factor. (AP Photo/Jose Luis Magana)

SPELLING OUT THE IMPACT OF RACE

Before the Supreme Court ruling, it seemed a given to Imani Laird that colleges would consider the ways that race had touched her life. But now, she felt like she had to spell it out.

As she started her essay, she reflected on how she had faced bias or felt overlooked as a Black student in predominantly white spaces.

In her final essays, she wrote about her grandfather, who served in the military but was denied access to GI Bill benefits because of his race.

She described how discrimination fueled her ambition to excel and pursue a career in public policy.

Hillary Amofa stands for a portrait after practice with members of the Lincoln Park High School step team Friday, March 8, 2024, in Chicago. When she started writing her college essay, Amofa told the story she thought admissions offices wanted to hear. She wrote about being the daughter of immigrants from Ghana, about growing up in a small apartment in Chicago. She described hardship and struggle. Then she deleted it all. "I would just find myself kind of trauma-dumping," said the 18 year-old senior, "And I'm just like, this doesn't really say anything about me as a person." (AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast)

Hillary Amofa stands for a portrait after practice with members of the Lincoln Park High School step team, March 8, 2024, in Chicago. (AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast)

WILL SCHOOLS LOSE RACIAL DIVERSITY?

Now, without affirmative action, she wondered if mostly white schools will become even whiter.

“That’s what I’m nervous about,” she said. “Going and just feeling so isolated, even though I’m constantly around people.”

Hillary Amofa reads her college essay on embracing her natural hair. (AP Video/Noreen Nasir)

The first drafts of her essay focused on growing up in a low-income family, sharing a bedroom with her brother and grandmother. But it didn’t tell colleges about who she is now, she said.

Her final essay tells how she came to embrace her natural hair . She wrote about going to a mostly white grade school where classmates made jokes about her afro. When her grandmother sent her back with braids or cornrows, they made fun of those too.

Over time, she ignored their insults and found beauty in the styles worn by women in her life. She now runs a business doing braids and other hairstyles in her neighborhood.

“I stopped seeing myself through the lens of the European traditional beauty standards and started seeing myself through the lens that I created,” Amofa wrote.

“Criticism will persist, but it loses its power when you know there’s a crown on your head!”

Ma reported from Portland, Oregon.

The Associated Press’ education coverage receives financial support from multiple private foundations. AP is solely responsible for all content. Find AP’s standards for working with philanthropies, a list of supporters and funded coverage areas at AP.org .

Should college essays touch on race? Some feel the affirmative action ruling leaves them no choice

When the supreme court ended affirmative action, it left the college essay as one of few places where race can play a role in admissions decisions.

Max Decker, a senior at Lincoln High School, sits for a portrait in the school library where he often worked on writing his college essays, in Portland, Ore., Wednesday, March 20, 2024.

Amanda Loman / AP

Like many students, Max Decker of Portland, Oregon, had drafted a college essay on one topic, only to change direction after the Supreme Court ruling in June.

But the essay he submitted to colleges focused on the community he found through Word is Bond, a leadership group for young Black men in Portland.

As the only biracial, Jewish kid with divorced parents in a predominantly white, Christian community, Decker wrote he felt like the odd one out. On a trip with Word is Bond to Capitol Hill, he and friends who looked just like him shook hands with lawmakers. The experience, he wrote, changed how he saw himself.

“It’s because I’m different that I provide something precious to the world, not the other way around,” wrote Decker, whose top college choice is Tulane, in New Orleans, because of the region’s diversity.

This year’s senior class is the first in decades to navigate college admissions without affirmative action . The Supreme Court upheld the practice in decisions going back to the 1970s, but this court’s conservative supermajority found it is unconstitutional for colleges to give students extra weight because of their race alone.

Scores of colleges responded with new essay prompts asking about students’ backgrounds.

Jose Luis Magana / AP

Writing about feeling more comfortable with being Black

When Darrian Merritt started writing his essay, his first instinct was to write about events that led to him going to live with his grandmother as a child. Those were painful memories, but he thought they might play well at schools like Yale, Stanford and Vanderbilt.

“I feel like the admissions committee might expect a sob story or a tragic story,” said Merritt, a senior in Cleveland. “I wrestled with that a lot.”

Eventually he abandoned the idea and aimed for an essay that would stand out for its positivity.

Merritt wrote about a summer camp where he started to feel more comfortable in his own skin. He described embracing his personality and defying his tendency to please others. But the essay also reflects on his feelings of not being “Black enough” and getting made fun of for listening to “white people music.”

Related: Oregon colleges, universities weigh potential outcomes of US Supreme Court decision on affirmative action

Essay about how to embrace natural hair

When Hillary Amofa started writing her college essay, she told the story she thought admissions offices wanted to hear. About being the daughter of immigrants from Ghana and growing up in a small apartment in Chicago. About hardship and struggle.

Then she deleted it all.

In English class, Amofa and her classmates read sample essays that all seemed to focus on some trauma or hardship. It left her with the impression she had to write about her life’s hardest moments to show how far she’d come. But she and some classmates wondered if their lives had been hard enough to catch the attention of admissions offices.

Hillary Amofa, laughs as she participates in a team building game with members of the Lincoln Park High School step team after school Friday, March 8, 2024, in Chicago. When she started writing her college essay, Amofa told the story she thought admissions offices wanted to hear. She wrote about being the daughter of immigrants from Ghana, about growing up in a small apartment in Chicago. She described hardship and struggle. Then she deleted it all. "I would just find myself kind of trauma-dumping," said the 18 year-old senior, "And I'm just like, this doesn't really say anything about me as a person."

Charles Rex Arbogast / AP

Now, without affirmative action, she wondered if mostly white schools will become even whiter.

“That’s what I’m nervous about,” she said. “Going and just feeling so isolated, even though I’m constantly around people.”

Related: Some Oregon universities, politicians disappointed in Supreme Court decision on affirmative action

The first drafts of her essay didn’t tell colleges about who she is now, she said.

Her final essay describes how she came to embrace her natural hair. She wrote about going to a mostly white grade school where classmates made jokes about her afro.

Over time, she ignored their insults and found beauty in the styles worn by women in her life. She now runs a business doing braids and other hairstyles in her neighborhood.

“Criticism will persist,” she wrote “but it loses its power when you know there’s a crown on your head!”

Ma reported from Portland, Oregon.

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Sob stories? Trauma dumps? Black kids worry about writing college essays after affirmative action ban

When the Supreme Court ended affirmative action in higher education, it left the college essay as one of few places where race can play a role in admissions decisions.

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Then she deleted it all.

When the Supreme Court ended affirmative action in higher education , it left the college essay as one of few places where race can play a role in admissions decisions. For many students of color, instantly more was riding on the already high-stakes writing assignment. Some say they felt pressure to exploit their hardships as they competed for a spot on campus.

“A benefit to a student who overcame racial discrimination, for example, must be tied to that student’s courage and determination,” he wrote.

Wondering if schools ‘expect a sob story’

Those were painful memories, but he thought they might play well at schools like Yale, Stanford and Vanderbilt.

“I was like, ‘OK, I’m going to write this for me, and we’re just going to see how it goes,’” he said. “It just felt real, and it felt like an honest story.”

The essay describes a breakthrough as he learned “to take ownership of myself and my future by sharing my true personality with the people I encounter. … I realized that the first chapter of my own story had just been written.”

A ruling prompts pivots on essay topics

Like many students, Max Decker of Portland, Oregon, had drafted a college essay on one topic, only to change direction after the Supreme Court ruling in June.

But the essay he submitted to colleges focused on the community he found through Word is Bond, a leadership group for young Black men in Portland.

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“It’s because I’m different that I provide something precious to the world, not the other way around,” he wrote.

If writing about race would give him a slight edge and show admissions officers a fuller picture of his achievements, he wanted to take that small advantage.

Spelling out the impact of race

Before the Supreme Court ruling, it seemed a given to Imani Laird that colleges would consider the ways that race had touched her life. But now, she felt like she had to spell it out.

As she started her essay, she reflected on how she had faced bias or felt overlooked as a Black student in predominantly white spaces.

“I didn’t have it easier because of my race,” said Laird, a senior at Newton South High School in the Boston suburbs who was accepted at Wellesley and Howard University , and is waiting to hear from several Ivy League colleges. “I had stuff I had to overcome.”

In her final essays, she wrote about her grandfather, who served in the military but was denied access to GI Bill benefits because of his race.

She described how discrimination fueled her ambition to excel and pursue a career in public policy.

Will schools lose racial diversity?

Now, without affirmative action, she wondered if mostly white schools will become even whiter.

“That’s what I’m nervous about,” she said. “Going and just feeling so isolated, even though I’m constantly around people.”

The first drafts of her essay focused on growing up in a low-income family, sharing a bedroom with her brother and grandmother. But it didn’t tell colleges about who she is now, she said.

Over time, she ignored their insults and found beauty in the styles worn by women in her life. She now runs a business doing braids and other hairstyles in her neighborhood.

“I stopped seeing myself through the lens of the European traditional beauty standards and started seeing myself through the lens that I created,” Amofa wrote.

“Criticism will persist, but it loses its power when you know there’s a crown on your head!”

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5 Ways to Help Your College Student Cope With Parent Divorce

Helping Your College Student Cope With Divorce

Essays About Divorce: Top 5 Examples and 7 Prompts

1. Divorce Should Be Legalized in the Philippines by Ernestine Montgomery

Top 7 Prompts on Essays About Divorce

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Persuasive & Argumentative Essays about Divorce: Free Tips

✍️ Divorce Essay Topics

1. Thesis Statement about Divorce

2. Main Body

3. Conclusion

📂 Divorce Essays by Type

Argumentative Essay about Divorce

Persuasive Essay about Divorce

Cause and Effect Essay on Divorce

Narrative Essay about Divorce